Hello everyone.
Yesterday I nearly burnt the house down, I was cooking bacon under the grill and forgot about it.
Flames from the oven and smoke. The fire brigade were great.
Its the second time I have done this, I was using cooking as a cognitive therapy thing. I am not going to cook anymore.
I guess I am a liability if I forget important things, could have burnt the house down. Cats ran out of the house but came back later, they were unhurt.
I guess I have learnt my lesson.
Jules
Oh not good, glad you and cats safe. Could you set a timer or reminder on your phone.
Hi
I think if i ever try again I will have to.
Will probably make sure I am not alone if i do now.
The smell of the fire isn't as bad tonight, horrible smell.
Jules
That must have been very frightening for you and I guess you must also be feeling quite dispirited and that your confidence will have taken a huge knock. If you are attempting cognitive testing/therapy, you need a professional to work with you to assess, so that safety checks/aids can be put in place. It may be possible to proceed after that. Meantime, you are right to call a halt. Not only your safety but also people living with you or nearby, may be compromised. Best wishes.
Hi Calceolaria
Jules here
Yes, I know you are right - i do have an OT and that is what she is going to say.
Funny, I never enjoyed cooking before the accident.
Plenty of other things for cognitive I suppose.
Just the thought of the hurt I could have caused to my animals is enough to put me off.
Regards
Jules
I try to help out with food, but have to go sit down and try to distract myself from pain /allow worst to pass. Things burn ! But I agree with the timer idea and have moved a chair into kitchen. Never stop.
Hi
Yes, I have agreed with my husband I wont use cooker if he isn't there.
Makes you feel like a child tho.
Better than feeling like an adult with 60% burns and homeless.
Go with the plan. I know it is hard but wait and cook safely and any other cognitive therapies that can lead you into danger. The road to recovery is a slow one but it is worth taking those little steps again. Hopefully they are going to be able to a far better quality of life once you have worked through them.
Remember that however small, each step is a stride forward and that is far better than these unsupported falls backward.
Go luck. Rib
All true 'Rib'.
Life is what we make it - nobody seems to direct you tho.
Jules
My dinner gong was the smoke alarm going off for a long time. I would forget to set timers so that didn't work - it still doesn't. I even got a timer that hangs around your neck as I would set it and leave it in kitchen and be distracted by other stuff going on and not hear it.
I always sit in the kitchen now whilst cooking and only cook when there are other family members around.
It's nice to cook together with your family and I enjoy the food more because we all chip in and no one can complain about not liking it!
Hi Danslatete
Jules here.
Yes, I think thats the way forward for me.
Its the second oven thats ended in flames.
Your words gave me a little giggle - I haven't got a dinner gong apart from smoke either !
Worst thing is I know he will be watching me closely now when I cook and it just makes me feel like a child, I was going to say someone with learning difficulties - but I guess I have now.
If thats true then that is pretty hard to accept. I wonder if thats how others see me.
How do you deal with it ?
Jules
I'm forgetting things all the time and its a pain can't rembember what I had for my breakfast did I have a cup of tea take my meds ??? Even brush my teeth I loose things around the house glasses if I take them off
Hi Progrock
My head gets so full and tired sometimes that I go into a daze. Lasts a couple of hours.
I thought if I distracted my brain with something completely different, like cooking, I might improve.
Seems that was a bad idea when it involved a cooker.
Cant sleep.
Jules
Jules try not to be hard on yourself at least you tried hey! Gave the cats a new smell to explore!!!! Next time you cook make sure someone's there but if your not really into cooking then through it out the window!!! Any good at knitting? I bought a basket making kit so today I'm trying to make a cute basket for all my meds 
Hope you got some sleep in the end.
Charli x
Hi Charli - jules here.
Thanks for that - i think if i do cook again then someone will have to be around.
I always hated cookery anyway.
Doing something creative but productive is good for the brain isnt it - makes you feel better anyway.
I cant knit, but I have half stripped the varnish off the living room table (old table) and its starting to look nice back to the natural wood.
Slept for an hour or so - same every night. Maybe thats just the way I am now - do you sleep well ?
Regards
Jules
Hi Jules
Table sounds lovely, maybe once it's all stripped you could use bees wax to get a really nice sheen without the horrible varnish. Sounds a nice little project for you. Your right it does make you feel better, well it distracts you for a while anyway! I love painting and drawing but unfortunately I'm rubbish!!! I don't sleep well in the nights at all. Always broken never feel restored and usually end up napping in the day. Grab some sleep back but it does catch up with me in the evenings. Pain has been much worse this last fortnight so that's not helping at all! How's your day been?
Charli x
Hi Charli
You sound very similar to me.
I love drawing and painting but am rubbish !
My pain is mostly under control now, taken 4 years to settle on right dosages.
I live in some sort of other world with my sleep pattern - sometimes i wake up thinking its 6am when its 6pm. Not getting used to it, more expect it now.
I suppose like everyone, I keep pulling myself together. There are people on this site a lot worse off.
I was trying to remember what it was you use on wood instead of varnish - beeswax - thank you.
Are you still working at all ? I am part-time from home now, trying to produce something of value. I find it difficult to 'see' if what I am working on is great or absolutely and obviously flawed/rubbish.
Hope you have a good day whatever you are doing
Jules
Pain and spasms in feet
Total Pain Meltdown 
I felt I failed as a mum because of my pain.
Concerned about medication long term effects.
Help? I can't use paper to clean myself and need advice to change a wet room.
