Just want to say a huge thank you for your supportive advice and words, and parting some of your strength to me, and at a time when some of you are are clearly battling it.
I will be specific about my recent investigations, to hopefully offer reassurance to others who may be equally experiencing the worry I had.
6 weeks ago I had an u/s which show a blocked tube, cyst on uterus and cyst on ovary. 3 weeks ago I had a CA125. Today I attended my first gynae appointment.
Pleased to say CA125 is normal. I have a hydrosalpinx and they are not sure whether cysts are cysts, polyps, fibroids or n.a other. The general thoughts are of non-urgency and that there is possible endometriosis/adhesions causing these things. I am to have a hysteroscopy to investigate further the cysts. The consultant is considering if a laparoscopy may be warranted.
Past investigations due to infertility, never informed me of endometriosis but a radiologist during a previous u/s, once said straight away, did I suffer this. I always thought my symptoms for years were that of endometriosis.
The positives today is an indication of no major concern or urgency, and I hope these continue.
My worse fear was the big 'what if'? I have gone thro' some major turmoils in my life and am regarded as a fighter and strong person. But I felt today if the 'what if' became more evident I couldn't be that strong person. I wondered why I felt this way and concluded because I wouldn't know what I was bl.....y fighting or have any control over it. The strength and spirit that some ladies on this site have clearly shown following major surgeries and treatments, is hugely admirable.
I guess an important message for both newbies and existing members is to never give up hope, to try as much as you can to focus on hope rather than the 'what ifs'. My own personal motto in life has been there is always some good, no matter how small, comes out of bad, and that is what has steered me throughout my life.
Wishing you continued strength and hope, and immense thanks to members and this very valid web support.