Thank you for all you wonderful comments and support on my last post, they help so much.
Unfortunately things have taken a turn for the worse, hubby took me to A & E Monday morning was in agony stomach pain. Turns out bowel obstruction which I thought it could have been.
So major op yest and now have a stoma.
I am devastated and so scared right now.
Worse thing is hubby now been allowed in. Feel so lonely and can’t stop crying.
Sam
Bless you for this new challenge that its has been thrown your way. Good thing that the obstruction has been caught in time. Please don't be scared. I am sending you all the best wishes with a big hug. Just get your focus on getting better and stronger. I know it is easier said than done, we all have many of those moments, but you can do it.
A stoma can be there temporarily to let the bowel rest and it is reversed most of the time after 6-8 months. I met a lady at the hospital who was telling me that she was frightened the first time she heard that she had a stoma and after a few months when they have recently offered her the operation to have it reversed, she said that she wasn't sure if she wanted to go back to what it was previously.
Oh bless you it’s pants going through something like that alone. I can imagine it’s scary waking up with a new appendage but the upside is they cleared the blockage and there’s a solution. A friend’s husband had to have one and went through a range of emotions but laughs at Karen now when she’s looking for a loo! If you’re on SM then look up some accounts as there’s some folk living the life with stomas and of course I’m sure there’s a group on here too xx
Aw Sam... big hugs. Hopefully you will feel better soon and that will help you cope with this rough patch xx
Oh Sam - I am so sorry to hear this. I had a stoma after my 2nd chemo in July 2017 as my bowel perforated - it saved my life! I had it reversed in sep 2019 But I must admit I had got used to it by that time. I only had it reversed as I had a parastomal hernia which was causing blockage problems. If there’s anything you want to ask about it please feel free to message me. Big hugs x x
Sam I know what a shock it must have been for you mentally and you are having to come to terms with this emotionally I have had a stoma since Jan 18 re my OC cancer had gone to the bowel. To be quite honest when my surgeon said I may have to have a stoma and that he won't know know until the debulking surgery because spots of cancer on the bowel/spleen sometimes are not visible on the scan but only to the naked eye when he does the surgery. I ended up with a lot of bowel out hence stoma and my spleen removed and my gall bladder plus full hysterectomy and cervix and omentum and part diaphragm and lots of lymph nodes etc. When he told me I may end up with a stoma I was devastated and practically begged him not too unless there is absolutely no alternative. I just hated the thought of me with a bag for want of a better word. Well the surgery went ahead and I had to have a stoma. Well it didnt affect me mentally as bad as I thought it would and I did come to terms with it quite quickly but not everyone does and people do struggle mentally. My husband couldn't believe how quickly I come to terms with it . Perhaps it was relief that he'd took all the cancer away I just don't know myself. As far a living with a stoma I go abroad, I swim in the pools/sea as these days the stomas are discreate (I wear a ruched costume) a nice stylish bandana one. Believe me you can live a normal life and do all the things you did before. A few months ago I was diagnosed with a very small hernia and went to see the bowel surgeon and he said he could reverse it but the risk are there as with all surgery and he said to me the hernia is very small and if you can live with your stoma I'd recommend you do as these reversals carry risk. I didnt go ahead with the reversal as didn't think it was worth it as hernia is small and not giving me any problems the oncologist recommended I see bowel surgeon. The stoma nurse will come and visit you at home and there is help for you to come to terms with this mentally. You are not alone there is lots of help for you. Also someone mentioned they may be able to reverse after healing this may also be an option if you are struggling mentally with it and it is feasible. Also there is a lot of info on the ovacome web about living with a stoma. If you want to ask me any questions just messaged me. Always here for you. June.x
Morning xx I had an emergency Stoma last august two days after my hysterectomy as my bowel had twisted and collapsed. It saved my life . I can’t have it reversed but it’s fine as I got on with ‘him’ Stormzi, my son named him ! The support from the Stoma team was and is amazing and you will be surprised how many people have them . It is a new way of living , diet and being prepared with a small bag of supplies to go out but you will be fine and live your life as before . Take care and think of a name !! XX
So sorry you are alone after all that shock. Will be wishing you strength to cope today and afterwards, {especially in this heat!}. Thank goodness for the internet.
Hi Sam , sorry to hear you are feeling scared & lonely especially when your family can't comfort you when you need it most. You probably won't believe me when I say to you that in 6 months time you will look back &wonder why you were feeling so scared & devasted about having a stoma bag. I woke up after my op Feb 2019 with one & I won't lie I was very sick & couldn't eat anything. It took awhile to settle & get used to changing it, to know what is ok to eat or not but it won't take you long before your an expert. I was nervous at first about going out to eat but if you take small steps you will get more confident. When I met my doctor before the covid he told me that it can be reversed but not until I have fully recovered from last op so please don't be too upset, you will be ok & when you get home you will learn to manage it yourself. Hope you will feel better when you get home to your family & if you have any questions your welcome to message me & hopefully I can help. Stay strong & be kind to yourself Xx
Thank you everyone for your replies, as usual your the best ones to chat to. I’m coping slowly, can’t say I’m not still shocked or upset by this all. I’m
Having the odd meltdowns now and again but stoma nurse is wonderful and so supportive. By Thursday all drips etc were removed and physio took me for a good walk and told me he didn’t need to see me anymore! I’ve cleaned and replaced my own bag now and starting to eat little bits. Ate well Thursday and Friday but yest was rough day, tired and queasy. Been allowed toast today so hopefully will enjoy that! I know it’s gonna be a slow and steady recovery it’s like 2 operations I suppose. Thanks again
I’ll keep you posted
Have a wonderful Sunday xxx
Getting better every day !!!!
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