i didn't know what to expect, and for four months i've been dreading it but it wasn't as scary as thought it would be.
i have a thing about needles, and i was dreading him jabbing them into my joints for a sample of synovial fluid but thankfully that didn't happen yesterday.
i listed all the joints which gave me grief - shoulders, elbows, wrists, hip knees, ankles, and a couple of fingers and after taking my medical history, and the joints which are effected, i wS told that the arthritis which i most likely have, is psoriatc arthritis - which is similar to rheumatoid as it is also an autoimmune inflamatory condition.
after a quick examination, he dissapeared out of the room and came back with an ultra sound machine.
i cant even remember which joint he looked at first - the knuckle on my index finger i think, not a joint thats bothered me much so i wasn't too surprised when nothing sinister showed up but i was shocked when the ultra sound didn't show any inflamation in my joints which are agony.
i don't even think there was that much inflamation in my achilles heels even though i now find it hard to walk because of pain!
i was frustrated! why the pain when there is no inflamation? i swear down that i'm not lying - the pain is horrible - it feels like something is trying to cut me up at my joints with a blunt knife!
he asked if i was having a good day, and i answered yes, it was a good day, because the day before i was really struggling, i nearly wet the bed in the morning because my joints refused to let me move - i crawled to the toilet on all fours that day!
i have another apointment for three months time, during my blood test (i can't remember what this one was for) asked the nurse if not finding inflamation was common in an inflamatory arthritis, as i have a lot of pain, but no inflamation showed up! and she said 'oh yes' i guess this is something she's used too.
so now it feels like my journey with this awful disease has 'officially' began.
i don't know what to expect, ive already hobbled down stoney roads and tripped a few times, i guess it's going to be a road where i won't see where i'm going so i'm going to take one step at a time, sometimes walking, sometimes crawling.