hey everyone, bit of a downer of a post but i’m simply fed up!!
i’m finding it so difficult to lose weight. i hate they way my body looks and i’m crying writing this post because i looked at some pictures of myself taken at the weekend and i cannot believe i look as big as i do
i have been going to the gym since lockdown restrictions lifted in april and i try to go daily. or atleast 3-4 times a week between work and university. or sometimes less when my fatigue and pain is bad. i haven’t seen any changes in my body, i feel like i look more fatter and gross than i did before i started working out. it’s so disheartening because i try so hard to be active and walk and swim etc.
i’m a very fussy eater so i think this is my downfall. i have cut some bad food habits out (like starting to take my own healthy lunch to work and not snacking on subway cookies during a shift) eating more fruit and veg etc however it isn’t enough. i don’t know what to eat because i’m picky, i got referred to a dietician but they were no help. all the meal plans they gave me to try i didn’t like. they also said they don’t deal with people who want to lose weight which was abit odd.
i take hydroxychloroquine and citalopram. i want to come off my antidepressants because i have only started gaining this weight since being on them. but i cannot risk relapsing and being in that dark dark hole i was before i stared taking them. i hate having to choose between my mental health and body image. i wish i didn’t have to take medication i’m so fed up of this illness i just want to curl up in a ball and not let anyone look at me ever again. i feel so sorry for my boyfriend because i’m too insecure to be intimate anymore. i feel so huge and disgusting. he loves me for who i am and no matter what size i am but it’s hard because whenever i look in the mirror i want to be sick. i’ve been offered leflunomide to take for my arthritis and i’ve heard many people lose weight on this drug. i’m not sure if that’s something to consider?
i hope this isn’t too dramatic and annoying but i needed to vent and express how i feel. i’m really stuck on what to do, i have stretch marks everywhere and bio oil takes too long to work 😩😂 i’m such a negative nancy i apologise xx
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oliviagodfreyxx
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Olivia don’t be so hard on yourself. We all go through waves of this at any age . For me I am doing Weightwatchers as I find it easy to stick too. The past week I have been off plan due to stress and feeling a bit low. However I don’t beat myself up as I know I will get back on track. Many of us including me put on weight due to drugs.
So my RA nurses have been great as I email them when I lose weight which keeps me focused and I also know some of my pills when I have to increase the level I want to eat more.
Just keep what you are doing eat as well as you can. Exercise when you can and don’t look to how you looked just focus that the antidepressant is working which is a huge plus.
Olivia, many of have done or still do struggle with our weight, so don't be so hard on yourself. Some of the medications we take don't exactly make things easy. You mentioned leflunomide, I found it easier to loose the weight when I cam off MTX and started leflunomide and toficinitib, it seems, for me anyway, that when my RA is better controlled I can keep the weight off. When I'm not so good the weight starts to creep back on.Sometimes having the support of a club, such as weightwatchers helps and make you feel less alone in your drive to lose weight.
Great advice from everyone. I would also like to add that the way we look at ourselves changes what we see. It’s a bit of an odd statement but hear me out. If you show a picture of the same person to different people they won’t see the same thing. What they see will depend on many things like the feelings they have for that person.
So when your boyfriend looks at you with love, affection, desire he will see something completely different from what you see because your feelings for yourself at the moment are negative.
Additionally, when you are a woman, your hormonal balance can have a huge influence on how you look at yourself. I know that once a month for a few days I feel fat, stupid and ugly so badly that I find it hard to get out if the house😬but I know it will pass so it helps.
One last thing. If you had a friend who had a nasty chronic disease and was struggling with mental health, would you berate her for not loosing weight ?
Sending lots of hugs and, as others have said, try to be kind to yourself 🌸
Not a negative nancy that’s for sure xx sometimes you have to say how you feel otherwise you just end up trying to keep it all in and end up feeling worse x
You’re allowed to feel fed up xx don’t feel bad for feeling that way x weight loss isn’t everything x feeling good is though xx try slimming world x lots of support and laughs along the way xx I go and am still aiming for that half a stone hahah I get near and com the other way 😂😂 but I keep going as it keeps me on track and everyone is understanding as they’re all there for the same reason xx
I get exactly how you feel. I have another condition that requires life long steroids. A couple of years ago they switched me from prednisolone to hydrocortisone, in 8 months I regained the 35lbs I’d lost whilst using prednisolone. I switched back and the weight gain stopped, but I cannot shift the 35lbs. My daughter got married in September, and I absolutely hate how I look and conscious of spoiling the photos I’m in, so I get it. I eat healthy do not use sugar, or snack between meals. I’m on 20 different meds for different issues, many of which have weight gain as a side effect. I used to go to the gym, but gave up when the pandemic hit. Too many people dripping sweat on equipment then not wiping it down. I’m on 5 immunosuppressants so felt it wasn’t worth the risk. I do go swimming, as well as walk or cycle most days. I would love to find a solution. I was a size 14, now a size 22 which at 5ft 1 inch is ridiculous. However all my healthy friends and family keep reminding me my health comes first. Maybe join a slimming club where you have support from others in a similar situation. I think we see ourselves more negatively than others see us. Take care 🤗
There is lots of evidence that you have to do an enormous amount of exercise to loose any weight and that your body tends to compensate for your energy expenditure.
Control of what you eat is the problem - and it is a problem! I've recently found that the book 'Spoon-fed: Why almost everything we've been told about food is wrong' by Tim Spector has been a help in putting things in perspective. It does seem as if some of us do have an individual difficulty due to the gut biome - the bacteria that live in our gut and finding out what foods are best for us as an individual is necessary to control our weight.
If you find groups help, then joining one does help but if like me you hate that kind of pressure, you can still do it by yourself. Just don't give up - it's just a long hard slog!
HiI’m so sorry you’re feeling low. I’ve been there too and still have days of looking at photos pre RA and then recent photos and can’t believe the difference in how I look.
It sounds like you’re doing great in making changes with diet and exercise BUT it is hard. It’s not an easy or quick fix. But you’ve made the decision to make changes, which is great.
I have recently stopped eating carbs after 6pm and it’s already making a difference to how I feel and look.
I’m lucky that I have a personal trainer who has seen me through pre RA days when I trekked to Everest Base Camp and recently when I cried in sessions cos I had no energy or strength.
I’m happy to give you some 1:1 support if you think this would help. No pressure 😊
You are surely having a hard go of it. Maybe you need a good psychologist to talk to and put thing in perspective for you.You need someone to turn to who has the knowledge to help. GPS can't do that. I think I you are trying very hard and nothing is going to happen over night. You need some guidance. It sounds like you have a great guy by you side. I wish you the very best. 💗
Hi Olivia, my mom has RA and she has gained weight a lot recently. We just started her on a non-inflammatory diet (using ingredients from the Plant Paradox book). It seems to help her as we are seeing some progress in her losing weight and also RA pains. Take a look at the book and see if it may be of any help to you.
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that is really kind of you. carbs really are my downfall!! i love them too much x
I want a new body! Stat!!!
Body feels off when I wake up
I think I rescued the wrong body.
So sore and tired from what oa/ra is doing to my body.
