I just want to be a mum...

My wee girl was up all night last night being sick, and has not been in a good way all day today. She has been lying on the sofa all day drifting in and out of sleep, mild temperature and generally feeling a bit rubbish. I've felt so guilty all day as all I've wanted to do is to let her cuddle into me and sleep, just as any mum would. However, as I'm now on a biologic and have been told I should stay away from anyone with an actively contagious illness, I've been so wary about spending loads of time close to her whilst she's ill. If she's asked for a hug, I've hugged her for a short time then reluctantly had to let her go. It goes against every instinct I have as her mum. Just feel so guilty that I'm not being the mum I should be to her at the moment.

12 Replies

  • I don't think a few cuddles with you wee daughter will make that much difference seeing as you have been up with her all of the night with her. If your going to catch it it won't be because of a few cuddles, it will be when your trying to clear up after her.xxxxxx

  • I am so sorry I can only imagine how bad it must feel:(

  • I agree with Sylvi....It will always be a balancing act, keeping ourselves well and being able to care for our family. You're a loving mum doing your best. Hope she's feeling better now. Love and light to you both 🤗😘 💐💐💐

  • I can understand how you feel, but as Silvi says you are already in close contact with her, you will be handling the the things she touches and the germs are in the air, wash you hands or use antibacterial gel as much as possible. I have been on Humira for 8 years and in contact with family and grandchildren with infections and not been infected, I do get colds and sickness at times and wonder where I caught them. Have to say I do feel pretty rubbish when I do. But you get over it. Go with how you feel. Hope your daughter feels a lot better today. X

  • Dont worry too much i have 2 lads still at home one is autistic so hes always around me and gets childrens illnesses iv been on biologics for 7 years came off them then went bk on them and never really made me ill just give her a cuddle im sure youll be fine if its chicking pox thats diffrent the only illnesses i got was allgeys from medications good luck dont worry too much tho you still have to be a mum and live a normal life love xxxx

  • I have been on different biologics for years with young children. I don't think the everyday sickness and coughs are the problem (yes you pick them up quicker and possibly they last longer) but the bigger issue is with the chicken pox, mumps, german measles type childhood illnesses. If the sickness virus is in your house it is very unlikely you will not get it anyway so for me I would still cuddle and take my chances. I don't cope well with anybody being sick so mine very quickly got used to having an ice cream tub pushed at them to save too much clearing up. Farm

  • Plus you still have an immune system , it might be dampened but you still have one.

    I would be the Mum you want to be just wash your hands more regularly.

    As the others have said, you are in what would be considered close contact anyway.

    Hope your daughter feels better very soon.


  • Hi I'm not in a biologic but agree with what has already been said.

    I work in a hospital so in contact with infections all the time.

    I would cuddle your wee little one as much you want

    All the best


  • She's much better today thankfully. She had a good sleep last night, and willing to drink this morning. Yesterday was a battle to get her to keep taking sips of juice. Was horrible to see her like that.

    As I've only been on the biologic for a few months, I'm probably just on that initial paranoia stage regarding infections. Hopefully that will settle over time! My husband had a D&V bug a few days ago too. Keeping everything crossed it doesn't spread to us! Thank you for all your kind words. x

  • Oh bless you both. I can't add anything to the excellent advice already given and I'm sure all will be OK. Just a small tip though. If your little one doesn't want or finds it difficult to drink try a small ice lolly or icepop. They maybe not something you would normally give as they tend to be high sugar but I have found them useful in getting some fluid into them. Perhaps putting a few healthier home-made ones in the freezer cold be an option. They're also good for bumped mouths. Wishing you both a happier day today


  • Great tip! I'll try that!

  • cuddles 4u and agree with advice given xx

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