New here!: Hello, I'm new to the group! I've recently... - NRAS

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Twinks80 profile image
Twinks80
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Hello, I'm new to the group! I've recently been diagnosed with RA by my pcp, I also have a pending upcoming rheumatologist appt. My symptoms of RA started shortly after I delivered my twins earlier this year on 1/1/2016. Before we were discharged from the hospital, I had to get an MMR booster because of decreased immunity along with a Rhogam shot since I'm RH B-. I've found a couple of articles that have linked the MMR vaccine to RA. Has anyone heard of this? I'm just trying to make sense of this. I'm a 35 y/o mom and wife to 4 kiddos and Im worried about my future with this condition.

Right now I'm on my second round of steroids, currently taking Prednisone 50mg daily, Meloxicam 15mg and Tramadol for pain. I've been pretty miserable for the last couple of months and it just seems like it keeps getting worse everyday πŸ˜”

Teresa

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Twinks80
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Twinks80 profile image
Twinks80

Thank you so much, Kai-- 😊

Clare26 profile image
Clare26

Hi Twinks80!

I can totally understand. I only just joined this group yesterday morning and have had such great support over the last 24 hours. I feel in a better frame of mind already. My condition is different - psoriatic arthritis (the think - still not 100% certain), but the symptoms are very similar and medications are usually the same. It's a really troubling time and our heads are full of all the information, struggling to understand the how and why and trying to look forward to see how our future will work out!! I don't have twins but I am a mum to a 5 yr old girl and a very active and boisterous 2 yr old boy. I feel guilty all the time as this just feels in the way of not just my life but theirs too. But I do believe, as these lovely people on here have told me, that there's hope and a positive future for us. It seems the beginning, the start of diagnosis is the hardest part - where we are at now. So I'm sure we can hang in there together. Cx

Ali_H profile image
Ali_H

Hi Twinks80,

Sorry to hear that you qualify for joining our merry band but a big welcome. Alas we won't be able to 'cure' you but hopefully the support will help you feel less down about things.

As you've 4 youngsters in tow I suggest you gracefully accept any family support and help from friends that is offered to see you through these extra difficult early days. At some point the right med regime will be found for you and things will ease up a bit. Some of us have used professional support in the form of a counsellor/therapist to see through the worst of it and it takes the pressure off all concerned... your GP should be able to make such a referral for you although there will probably be quite a waiting time... well worth it in my opinion!

I hope things look up for you soon,

All the best

Ali

Twinks80 profile image
Twinks80β€’ in reply toAli_H

Thank you, Ali_H 😊

Caspiana profile image
Caspiana

Hello Twinks. Oh how I so understand your worries. I was diagnosed with RA when my children were still young and in school plus I had a full time career and looked after elderly relatives. I thought my life was ending. But with patience, treatment and support my life didn't end. Sure, I had to make compromises and life style changes but it was doable.

Like everyone here has pointed out, this is a fabulous place for support. You'll make some great friends here who understand exactly what's going on.

Be patient with treatment. It takes time for the medication to work and also to find the right medication for you. Most importantly be kind and patient to yourself.

Hang in there. It does get better.

Cas xx πŸŒ·πŸŒΈπŸ’œ

Twinks80 profile image
Twinks80β€’ in reply toCaspiana

Thank you, Caspiana 😊

Twinks80 profile image
Twinks80

Thank you! I've been blessed with a wonderful hubby, parents and a sister who is very helpful with helping me 😊

I'm very interested in those articles, thanks again Kai-- !

Julia2009 profile image
Julia2009

Hi there, I've literally just been diagnosed with RA last week but been suffering for about 7 months now. My daughter is soon to be 2 soon so I know how you feel being worried about this conditions future as well as looking after your children. I have two older children 12 and 10 who have been great and supportive of my condition. I've learnt a lot about RA and know/hope once I get started on medication that my future will look brighter. So will yours. Hang in there and take each day as it comes. I turned 30 recently so didn't expect to be diagnosed with RA at all however trying to be positive is the way forward. The support on here seems great so feel free to post as much as you need.

Take care

sylvi profile image
sylvi

First off welcome and i am sorry you have to come here. This is a great group of people and someone will always have an answer for you and i am going to add my tuppence worth.

You haven't mentioned whether you have post natal depression or not,i am not saying that is the cause of your suffering,but it could add to your problems. It is a big dose of steroids and your still in pain,i think you should contact your dr and see what they can do to help you as with new babies you have your hands full as well as the othe two children you have darling. Big hugs from me a fellow sufferer.xxxxxx

PFKAAde profile image
PFKAAde

Hi Twinks80

As others have already said a warm welcome unfortunately offered.

Without going over what others have already said, I just thought I'd offer some more encouragement from a fellow parent (different gender) - but with 'only' the two of them.

I became ill 16 years ago and was still only 30 at the time. Since then my (then) girlfriend became my wife and we decided to have children. I had to stop taking virtually all of the meds I was on apart from prednisolone (almost identical to prednisone but different strengths I believe) and painkillers.

I had a 3 year spell of uncontrolled disease just as the first was born. Number two followed reasonably soon after so we had two under 3 years old. My wife went back to her full-time (and then some) job and I became main carer.

Now, I realise things are not identical for a mother / father, but the running around, nappy changing, feeding (post breast😳) etc all still need doing regardless of who has to do it. Now, if I can do it with 2 you can with 4. πŸ˜€ I am, after all, male. Some things don't come naturally to us, although we are quite capable in our own way.

Anyway the eldest (boy) is now 7 and the youngest (girl) 5 and they are both happy and healthy young children. I haven't yet dropped them with my painful wrists, they haven't starved or been neglected in any way, quite the opposite in fact. They have benefitted from having a parent around all of the time, who can give them the attention and love only a parent can. They are both excelling at school and are perhaps more considerate and understanding than some of their peers with 'normal' parents.

They understand that there are things I cannot do, and they adjust. They get used to you however you feel and they love you regardless of what illnesses you may have.

I know you know this already, having two older ones, but I'm just reinforcing the things you know yourself.

You will cope. You won't always feel this bad. Your children sound like they are very lucky to have 2 parents that love them and support each other. You are bound to feel overwhelmed in your situation, God knows twins are hard enough on their own, but with two older ones and an autoimmune condition to deal with, it is bound to be difficult at times.

This is a good place to come for reassurance and advice when things get tough, you may be surprised to find that there is usually someone who is feeling or has felt the exact same thing.

Good luck with finding g the right treatment regime for you, it exists it is just a case of finding it.

I've been in remission for 5-6 years now and other health concerns have taken over for now. But I will get through it.

And so will you.

Kind regards

Ade

Twinks80 profile image
Twinks80β€’ in reply toPFKAAde

Thank you so much, PFKAAde 😊

PFKAAde profile image
PFKAAdeβ€’ in reply toTwinks80

You're very welcome. 😊

Ali_H profile image
Ali_H

How the heck do you parents do it? You have my total respect living with RA and similar conditions and raising youngsters!

PFKAAde profile image
PFKAAdeβ€’ in reply toAli_H

You don't have much choice truth be told.

Actually you make a very good point. I think if I hadn't had my children to look after, in fact I know, there would have been a lot of times when I would have sat around feeling (painfully) sorry for myself.

There have been many, many times over the last few years where I have watched my wife walk out of the door in the morning with a sense of absolute dread and thought I can't do this. But you don't have a choice. Your kids don't understand (most adults don't so we can't expect children to) that everything hurts. They just know they're hungry / in need of attention / help / whatever. And somehow, you just cope.

I think it's a bit like the way that some people, usually those that are incredibly focussed and determined, never have a single day off work and then break up for holidays and get ill with a bad cold or whatever. You just don't allow yourself to give in. You can't.

It's amazing what people can make themselves do given the motivation. When you have children they become the most important things in your life, overnight. You realise how self-centred you were before you had them, and of course. Up till then you were the most important thing in your life. Most parents would die for their children, without hesitation.

That is purely opinion of course, not sure there's any scientific basis for any of that, but I suspect most parents would agree.

Regards

Ade

Welcome to the group Twinks80

As you can see, lots of help and support from everyone here.

Regards

Beverley (NRAS Helpline)

nad1611 profile image
nad1611

Hi Twinks when I first became ill they didn't really know what to label me with so I suffered for years until finally the Rheumatologist I have now worked it all out. I was 35 and had three kids 8 and under. I think it took me at least four years to finally accept what was going on. I resisted help, fought against it and was determined to carry on. All that did was make me worse. So my best advice is to say accept your illness, that doesn't mean giving in to it but more that you stop fighting it and find ways to enjoy and live your life in spite of it. The kinder you are to your body the more you'll be able to achieve. You'll also feel more in control at a time when you feel you have none. Your children will be fine. You will love them in just the same way as you would if well. Once your regime of medication gets sorted you will hopefully be able to manage more. Before I started Methotrexate I could hardly bear touching things with my hands even at rest they hurt. Now they still hurt if I use them for repetitive things but it's so much improved. It can be scary but like most things in life we find a way forward and you'll find yours, hopefully with a little help from others who have walked your path. I am nineteen years on from that thirty five year old and I survive. Life has been different than I planned but I don't think I feel that I've really lost out on anything. Good luck and congrats on the twins.

Twinks80 profile image
Twinks80β€’ in reply tonad1611

Thank you so much!

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