THE C WORD!!: I'm trying to lighten the load a bit with... - NRAS

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THE C WORD!!

Jeanabelle60 profile image
48 Replies

I'm trying to lighten the load a bit with something light hearted.......I want to know how many of you hate that Christmas starts in November......

Seems like we have just shaken the sand out of our knickers when Christmas cards appear in the shops!!!

"Wasn't like that in my day"......people putting up C'mas decorations after Halloween.......Santa in shopping centres from early November.......whats going on?

What do you think of all this.....I want to hear from all the young ones on here too and not just the auld carmudgens........get it all off your chest.......

Personally, I love C'mas, I love it through my three grandchildern. Watching them takes me back to my own childhood C'mas's. I can do without all the commercialism......having said that I do look forward to some of the C'mas advertisments on the telly.....

I do know that C'mas can be a very challenging time for a lot of people. It can be very lonely and sad...... I just want to acknowledge that before we go any further. I have had my share of those too so I can understand......this is meant to only bring a bit of 'normal' chat on the site......

XXXX

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Jeanabelle60 profile image
Jeanabelle60
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48 Replies

I got my first Christmas card a week ago .I am dreading Christmas this year its ok for the kids haaaa humbug

Jeanabelle60 profile image
Jeanabelle60 in reply to

I don't believe you!!!!! Now that really is overdoing it I think.......very OTT

Barrister profile image
Barrister

I love Christmas! Mind you, I'm in Saudi Arabia at the moment and so im missing it all in the shops at the moment but so looking forward to coming home at the end of the month. I plan to spend 1st December listening to Christmas carols and writing my Christmas cards. So excited! Clemmie

Jeanabelle60 profile image
Jeanabelle60 in reply toBarrister

Lovely.....

Philip profile image
Philip

It started in September here lol and I hate because it's way too early.

Jeanabelle60 profile image
Jeanabelle60 in reply toPhilip

'SEPTEMBER'!!! no way.....not in my house......you poor thing.

Jaynes profile image
Jaynes

I work in a large supermarket, decorations are being put up this week and xmas songs will start next week. I think its soo too early to listen to white Christmas and the pogues every day until Christmas. Oh and the pogues song used to be my favourite but dont like to listen to it continually. Lol.

Jeanabelle60 profile image
Jeanabelle60

Before my son went into business for himself he worked for a large Irish supermarket chain.....he hated C'mas after that....the piped music, women fighting over turkeys and toys, opening hours to late at night, children running everywhere...well more than usual it seemed at the time, no parking places and people shopping like the world was going to come to an end!!!

Sorry but the Pogues are still one of my favorites at C'mas....just love them.

I also used to love taking my son up the town to see the C'mas light getting turned on after Santa climbed out of the clock tower.....loved it!!

nomoreheels profile image
nomoreheels

Years ago the first company I worked for played Christmas music from about this time of the year & I was fed up of it by the time the big day came. My second job was in an office & remember going to the Christmas party at a big hotel, walking into the function room & hearing Christmas music for the first time that year. It felt such a thrill, like Christmas as a kid..... at 31!

About a fortnight ago Tesco had some cards I thought I'd have but as it was so early didn't buy them. Went back last weekend & they'd sold out of that design! Went online, thought I'd click & collect, they're out of stock too. Crazy. ;)

Jeanabelle60 profile image
Jeanabelle60 in reply tonomoreheels

Like paulywoo below, no matter how much we give off about it all there is just something about this time of year, even if it does start far too soon.

Actually my favourite part of it is St Stephens Day.....Boxing Day to some. On this day all hands gather in my son's house and we have a great day. It is this day that my grandchildren get their presents from me so it is like a second C'mas day to them. Lots of friends, a wee drink or two and loads of lovely food.....sure you couldn't ask for more.

Once again I think we have to mention those that don't have these thing to look forward to. I'v had a few of them so I know what its like. I was at my physicial and emotional worst with RD one C'mas and wasn't able to move off the bed. I had to just tell myself that it was only one day and that it would pass. Of course C'mas isn't really one day anymore and that really doesn't help those who are for one reason or another not at their best at this time of year and our thoughts go out to them.

nomoreheels profile image
nomoreheels in reply toJeanabelle60

Oh yes, I love it Jean. In fact I really missed it when we lived abroad as it's so different. I love seeing the trees appearing people's houses, one by one & sending & receiving cards. Though again, that was quite different as they don't go a whole bundle on cards so only sent to & received from the few Brits we knew.

I went to town on our first Christmas back here last year but it was tinged with sadness as my m-i-l was fading in a nursing home & her gift was the only one left under the tree. Unfortunately she never got to open it so it will be strange this year with just the three of us again. Nevertheless we'll celebrate but hoping that my f-i-l won't be too upset having had nearly a year without her there sitting beside him. Boxing day certainly won't be the same as we all used to pile to them for a buffet so just wondering if I should invite everyone to us but not sure if that's such a good idea as h's brother & wife didn't invite us or his dad to his house when he had a buffet last year. Can do without the stress tbh!

Jeanabelle60 profile image
Jeanabelle60 in reply tonomoreheels

mmmmmm, families and C'mas, can be a bit dodgy......smile, be civil and move on is my advice......keeping the peace in the season of 'peace and goodwill'......again, I think many of us have been there once or twice.....still maybe its time to start a new tradition!

nomoreheels profile image
nomoreheels in reply toJeanabelle60

Oh I will certainly be civil. Managed to last year when we agreed as they were a bit strapped we wouldn't buy one another gifts yet they spent loads on one another (I know because we got two or three of b-i-l's gifts on behalf of his wife & stored them at our house til she was ready to wrap them! And they bought her brother a gift.......& told us they had!!!! Not bitter for me I couldn't give a monkeys but for my h. He's already said it won't be forgotten this year, oh dear lol! ;)

I love love love it!! The weather's miserable. The nights are drawing in and all feels damp, dark and gloomy. Just when all feels lost the fat man in red appears, bringing promise of turkey dinner with the family, Christmas movies on tv, cheesy music and falling asleep wearing a wonky Christmas cracker hat with a full tum, tin of Qualiy Street on my knee and glass of Baileys in my hand :-) Oh and lets not forget opening presents. Feeling warm and fuzzy now x

bencar profile image
bencar

Don't post much, feel I must wish you all a Merry Painless Christmas (or is it too early). There has been times after reading some of the posts on here I have felt so much better, so thanks to all of you that post regularly.

Jeanabelle60 profile image
Jeanabelle60 in reply tobencar

Awh Bencar, that's lovely and thanks for my first C'mas greeting of the year and the very same back to you. Glad you have found this site so helpful. XX

hatshepsut profile image
hatshepsut

I've always loved Christmas. When my children were small, we used to put up the decorations on Christmas Eve, after they had gone to bed, so that it was magical on the day, with presents as well! And there's nothing to compare with the thrill of the piles of knobbly shaped parcels, in exciting coloured paper......even if most of them are for the children. The excitement in everyones' faces, and the delight when a longed for gift emerges

Christmas dinner was always turkey, plus pork for my oh, with two types of stuffing, roasties, and piles of veg aand all the usual trimmings Then

Homemade pudding, mince pies.

Turkey sandwiches for supper, washed down with a glass of wine, then fresh coffee and large baileys on ice

And then boxing day, when there were so many leftovers, that everyone could help themselves, and I didn't have to do anything!!

Nowadays, I think that it goes on for too long, and it diminishes the magic!!!

However, there's still the little girl in me , that loves it all! M x

nomoreheels profile image
nomoreheels in reply tohatshepsut

The decks didn't go up til Christmas Eve when I was still at home though I used to help(!) mum & dad. More hindrance than help probably but I loved it. Mince pie & a glass of sherry for Santa & a carrot for Rudolph & my empty stocking beside them on the hearth then off to bed. Always heard him arrive (that was spoilt when I grew older & found the sleigh bells mum (or dad, not sure) used to jingle to announce his arrival. Butterflies in tum & then off to sleep content there'd be something there in the morning. Crumbs, empty glass & carrot top left next to my stocking full of nuts, satsumas, bag of chocolate money & shiny new pennies! Then the presents..... wonderful memories!!! I still have those sleigh bells threaded on ribbon & they always have a place towards the front on the tree.

Jeanabelle60 profile image
Jeanabelle60 in reply tonomoreheels

Beautiful......and so innocent too. When my brothers and I were small we all slept in the one big room, there was four of us one after the other, with slanted ceilings.....I can remember saying "I can hear hoofs on the roof"....my brother at the other end of the room said "I can here them too"......talk about innocent!

Jeanabelle60 profile image
Jeanabelle60 in reply tohatshepsut

As I think there is in all of us......thanks. XX

I sing in a small choir so it's been full on with rehearsing Christmas songs for months now as all the concerts start at end of this month so we have to be ready. I love this side of it even though I'm not religious. But the side that worries me always is the financial side and the fact that we spent our budget for about four years, holidaying last month means that we are having to tell our sons that this year things need to be homemade and be frugal about all aspects - which might not go down too well!

Our oldest son is on the autistic spectrum and Christmas was very difficult for many years when he was younger - he hated surprises and the whole suspense thing as it disturbed his routine. He still behaves like an angry bee on the day itself which makes things tense but he's a young adult now so we can chivvy him out of it usually now. Also my hubby is working on Christmas day and New Year's Day this year and he's the family chef so he'll be sleeping most of the afternoon and Boxing day too.

Not very enthused this year I have to admit!

Jeanabelle60 profile image
Jeanabelle60 in reply to

God, you have your hands ful don't you? It is interesting though what the holiday actually means to different people. I love the idea of singing in a choir though like you I'm not religious, in fact I'm an aethist but i was brought up in an Irish Catholic family so my memories are very much of the majicial Midnight Christmas Eve Mass and a Nativity scene under the tree. These are still part of my C'mas just like a tree, presents, a nice Brandy. There are people who have the same ethos as me that want to take the 'Christmas' out of C'mas but for me it is part of the holiday.....

I was brought up C of E and husband RC but he is an aetheist and I'm an agnostic. I think singing religious music stops me from being a proper aetheist and I am fascinated by religious rituals of all types. Mum would drag us to church on Christmas Day and for me this meant I could sing and I loved it - although it was dull for my sisters as they are both deaf. I like the run up to it all with all the music and visuals and food but rarely enjoy Christmas itself because of husband's shifts and eldest son tensions! X

Jeanabelle60 profile image
Jeanabelle60 in reply to

No matter what your beliefs it does eave a lasting memory from childhood....XX

Yes I agree. The reason I still have romantic associations of Christmas despite more recent tensions are because mine were always spent at my Scottish grandparent's house near Edinburgh and that was fantastic for a child as they had a big old fashioned house surrounded by moorland and forests and Edinburgh for panto. I can see that growing up in the Irish RC household would have given you a lot of good Christmas associations too. Tx

Jeanabelle60 profile image
Jeanabelle60 in reply to

Yes, I'm grateful that I have such lovely memories, I'm very lucky, there are many that through no fault of their own don't have them and we need to be aware of them coming up to this time of year too.......I was sitting in a neighbours kitchen earlier today and she is dreading C'mas as she literally has no family members left and is dreading all the 'family feast' that is coming up.....I do feel for them.

in reply toJeanabelle60

My parents used to always have neighbors and friends less fortunate than them over for the big family dinner and this made it more fun for us too usually. But they (my parents and grandparents) have all died suddenly near to Christmas time so that's another aspect of winter that I find quite hard now.

If the boys are ever not with us for Christmas I would really like to have friends who don't have anywhere to go over for the big meal just as my parents did. I think this would make it more joyful all round as to me it feels very indulgent these days with boys hungover and sleeping all morning and opening their presents in a stupor or grump! But our house isn't big enough to have anymore round the table and eldest is bringing his girlfriend here this year too. And she's got lots of eating issues so that's not going to the sense of harmony much either. Oops sorry you wanted to bring cheer didn't you Jean?! I should have stayed away!!

Jeanabelle60 profile image
Jeanabelle60 in reply to

Sharing your C'mas memories does bring a lot of cheer I'm sure to many reading these replys. Nothing stays the same though does it......someday your boys will have a great laugh at opening their presents 'under orders'.....you are making their memories!

Don't ever stay away, please. XX

in reply toJeanabelle60

Thanks Jean xx

Carolsos profile image
Carolsos

Christmas is magical and even at this age I feel like a kid on Christmas Day, even though I will be working all over the the festive period and new year. My kids are coming over the weekend after Christmas and we are having special dinner then.. My birthday is 3 days before Christmas and I go over to my twin sisters and we have a big party with all the other relatives so really its like a Christmas party early. I am hoping everyone has a special time sometime over the holidays and we are all pain free for a part of them. Christmas was always special at home with mum and dad, we had a big family and even though we did not have much money we never missed out on things that is being part of a loving family!

Jeanabelle60 profile image
Jeanabelle60 in reply toCarolsos

Now we know why your called 'Carol'......thats a great point you made about how back in the day it wasn't all about £££££££££.

The part of Ireland I'm from has always been and still is the most deprived part of the country. Historically it has been very poor and so when C'mas came around presents tended to be things you 'needed' like a new pair of shoes, a jumper or as I'll never forget my lovely Aunt Sadie, that I lived with, buying a quarter tonne of coal to close elderly relatives as C'mas presents.....the young people now would be horrified!

Carolsos profile image
Carolsos in reply toJeanabelle60

Yes kids nowadays would be mortified about that present. Over the last few years everyone in my family now get either homemade sweets,cookies or something made for them. I like to make something and enjoy doing that instead of trying to figure out what to buy them. It is a joyful time but if Christmas could stay in December that would be better. I don't enjoy the snow unless am not at work sat near a roaring fire. Lol

Thanks for replying

Jeanabella60

Am new to this site

Jeanabelle60 profile image
Jeanabelle60 in reply toCarolsos

Awh Carol, I'm really glad you have come on the site......every now and then someone will introduce a question that isn't really related to RD......just to bring a bit of humur and to get people talking. Really glad your here.XX

Carolsos profile image
Carolsos in reply toJeanabelle60

Thank you jean for saying that. My brother found this site for me as I had just been told got RA about 9weeks ago. Have seen the counsulton and he gave me a steroid injection but did not work so in the meantime I have had to come off work for these last 2weeks my knee swelled up and my doc ordered me to have time off. Was so desperate for the pain to sop agreed. But am back on Tuesday and on Monday I start my new drugs at last. Sorry to go on but just wanted to tell some one. My doc gave me steroids in tablet form for 6days. Brilliant at the time. This site is brilliant,so caring and you and everyone on here are a blessing. Thank you for listening.

Jeanabelle60 profile image
Jeanabelle60 in reply toCarolsos

Darlin, you are very, very welcome hhere. You are amoung peolpe who know exactly what you are going through. We have all started off bewildered, confused, fulll of questions, angry, depressed......

I may not have had your exact experience but the feeling are all the same and if I didn't heve your experience someone else on here will have.

You are in the very early stages oof RD and I want you to know that if you are going to get this disease it coudn't have happened at a better time..... I know that doesn't sound right but there is so so much available to us now that many other sufferers didn't have on times gone.

I have this disease now for nearly 4 years and althought it took a while I am now on a wonderful drug that has given me back almost 95% of my 'normal' life.

Our Dr's now have so many drugs that can work wonders for RD patients. There is much that can be done so please try not to get too down hearted.

Use this site as often as you need to. You can come on here and rant and rave like a lunatic if you need to, compalin about Dr's, hospitals, polititians, drugs, people.....anything you want to shout about. Feel free to ask any question you need to......and you will have ??????'s.

All the best, Jean. XX

allanah profile image
allanah

I hate Christmas, loads of work, loads of buying stuff no one really wants, just watching tv or trying to get people to have a half hearted game of charades. Then I got RA!! The kids started doing Xmas dinner for me. I started internet shopping and amazon wish lists, my friends come round and I do tea and biscuits and they wrap my presents. And I go yo the wonderful nras newcastle Xmas lunch! Now I enjoy Christmas!!!!

Jeanabelle60 profile image
Jeanabelle60 in reply toallanah

Now this is they way to turn a negative into a positive......good on ya! XX

Hobbits profile image
Hobbits

Well I will chime in here. Why do I like Christmas??? because that means Spring is that much closer...I live in Canada and I am not a winter person, the cold aggravates my RA to no end, so winter means suffering.

I wish it was all magical and happy and all that! Dont get me wrong, its a great day for kids and family...but I wait for the warm weather......I wish for Xmas in July!!

Jeanabelle60 profile image
Jeanabelle60 in reply toHobbits

Canada is hardly the place to live if you don't like winter weather.....does it not be lovely at C'mas with the snow?

Hobbits profile image
Hobbits in reply toJeanabelle60

lol jeans, oh don't I know it!

About once every five years or so we get a White Christmas but usually is a freezing wet rain Green Christmas, the snow we get up until mid January usually isn't enough to stay on the ground.

We get huge dumplings which takes day to shovel out, then it all melts till the next dumping.

Around mid January -March we get tons of snow.....I will admit the giant flakes that fall really slow are beautiful but for some reason the cold makes me flare.... My guess is my joints contract causing pressure but this is certainly not a scientific explaination!

Since my RA I unfortunately have come to see winter as the bane of my existence....I dream of living somewhere one day with warmer winters.

OMG looking out my window it's now snowing....weather forecast predicted it, I didn't believe it.... It wont stay, it will melt when it hits the ground.... Wow no that's irony... Will teach me not to bad mouth the snow! Bawhaha

nomoreheels profile image
nomoreheels

Thanks for posting this Jean. I'm really enjoying the different memories & takes on Christmas. I hope you have a lovely time on Boxing Day with your family but what will you be doing on Christmas Day itself?

Jeanabelle60 profile image
Jeanabelle60 in reply tonomoreheels

I was in the middle of this reply yesterday when my iPad just went blank......on C'mas Day I just spoil myself rotten.....the best wine I can afford, all my favorite films recorded on the telly and of course any amount of chocolate, cakes, biscuits, deserts etc, etc, etc......if I'm fit to walk and the weather is willing I will take the two dogs to the park for a bit of a run around.....believe me I have a lovely day, it suits me and of course I have the next day to look forward to.....I have a llovely time all snuggled up with a new fleece and jammies that I also treat myself to every year......

nomoreheels profile image
nomoreheels in reply toJeanabelle60

That's wonderful Jean! You see such sad situations on the tv leading up to Christmas so it's lovely to hear that. I bet Barney & Kells don't go without either! Our 3 love ripping open their pressies, in fact bought them some turkey chews the other day & put them in their cupboard (where we keep the dog biscuits) & found my h had already bought them a squeaky toy each!

So which films will you have lined up to watch on the day....... or how about starting another thread next week "Favourite must-see Christmas films"? x

Jeanabelle60 profile image
Jeanabelle60 in reply tonomoreheels

Where do I begin....'Gone With The Wind', 'Wonderful Life', the origional 'Scrouge' with Alistar Simm. The dorr knocker changing to Marleys face terrified me as a child. I bought the dvd as it doesn't be on to often. Another film I love is 'Watership Down' but again its doesn't be on often. I don't normally do the mass produced 'Home Alone' etc type of film I'm afraid......but as it is my day, its my decision.....don't have to pease anyone else but myself......being single has its componsations!

What about you? What do you like to see every year?

nomoreheels profile image
nomoreheels in reply toJeanabelle60

Not telling!!!! ;)....... I'll save them for when we do a new thread!

Jeanabelle60 profile image
Jeanabelle60 in reply tonomoreheels

Right, off you go then, I started the last one, your turn now.

Eisbaerin profile image
Eisbaerin

I love christmas and although one of my jobs involves starting on christmas in July (I am a cardmaking tutor/designer), I do like to get into it fully. Saying that I like starting things like making presents/cards,baking etc. from late October/early November, the actual decorations won't come out in our house before December! And I don't like seeing too much christmas stuff before Mid November either... But I don't moan about it, I just ignore until I'm ready :-)

Jeanabelle60 profile image
Jeanabelle60 in reply toEisbaerin

I used to bake for C'mas when my big son was a wee boy......C'mas fruit cake, Cherry Midera, biscuits, C'mas puddings. The problem was hiding them.....I always started this in October too.

I think we will just have to let people be the people they are, sure it would be a very dull world if we all thought and behaved the some.

I want to thank everyone for all the great replies. Your stories about your childhood memories were really lovely and brought back many memories for me too of the season.

I wish all on this site a very happy and of course healthy Christmas.

Also, thank you too to the workers behind the scenes for all their hard work too.

Have a wonderful time, no matter how you celebrate. XX

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