Day from Hell: what a day My arrogant boss - he... - NRAS

NRAS

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Day from Hell

susanh profile image
21 Replies

what a day

My arrogant boss - he doesnt want to know how I feel about my job. All my suggestions have been ignored, because I smile most of the time and don't show my RA most of the time. Therefore in his eyes I am not ill.

Oh well life is not so bad just got to keep going as long as I can, maybe tomorrow will be a better day

Susanh xxx

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susanh profile image
susanh
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21 Replies
sciqueen profile image
sciqueen

Hi Susan

that's the spirit, you don't know what tomorrow will hold in store for you.

So until tomorrrow; say 3 sware words in quick succession, ensuring that no kids are around as penance for your bad thoughts!

Keep the faith and good luck for tomorrow

Sci x

susanh profile image
susanh in reply to sciqueen

bolyollocks woops now how much penance will I have to do, My daughter says she is going to buy me a punch bag perhaps I can take some of my flustration out on that

Tomorrow is another day xx

sciqueen profile image
sciqueen in reply to susanh

Hi Susan

How was the ogre today???

Glad you saw the funny side to my reply, sometimes it helps to make light of a very serious situation.

But I think he's an ass, lots of us on here work for ass's!

Keep smiling

Sci x

susanh profile image
susanh in reply to sciqueen

The bully was in for an hour then he made his way to teeside office, so peace for a few days. I have now found out that I am to go onto transport planning with all the long hours that go with it

I think a new job is in order, part time as soon as I can arrange

Susan, can you go over his head or is he the head? Is there a possibility to get an occupational therapist in to look at your workplace?

I think most of us on here who work know the feeling - unless you are stooped, limping and screaming in agony you are considered well and if you complained you are considered a moaning hypochondriac. Life can be made so much more miserable because of work. I rarely say anything in work about my ra anymore but i did get working from home on a monday which is great but that is due to run out soon.

Its not fair and there are laws against it but I know that i found it too hard to continually fight, it was easier just going into work, saying nothing, trying to get all my appointments on Mondays so that i didn't have to explain. I have been diagnosed a year now and i have found just lately that i am able to say that i am tired or ask for help moving things - I think as i get more familiar with this disease it gets easier to speak about my limitations in a confident way and not with an apology.

There are so many people on here who know about where you are legally - I really hope you get something sorted soon.

susanh profile image
susanh in reply to

He is the boss, The only place I could go is HR but I don't think I can go there and they would not relay what I want to say direct to my boss. I know there is OC at my place but they feel they have doen enough by providing me with a wrist rest.

I am seeing my RA nurse in March so I will see what I can do

Treesha profile image
Treesha

Hi susan, what an ass your boss is but it seems nearly every boss is the same. my hubby is disabled and had never been unemployed. he always gives more than the ablebodied staff. never has time off, goes in early, stays late even when in agony etc etc.but just recently he was told he may have to have an amputation and he was honest and upfront with his boss. He lost his job soon after. nobody wants to have troublesome staff. unfortunatley i have seen this many times over throughout my working life and no matter what laws there are in place reality is something altogether different. good luck with your boss, i hope things improve for you. xxxxx

susanh profile image
susanh in reply to Treesha

Thank you

That is exactly how I feel at the moment troublesome but I would like to see my boss smile through what I am going through. I would not wish it on my worst enemy.

Tomorrow is another day

Hoping tomorrow is a better day xx

I really hope you can rise above this stupid boss. I am self employed but my husband's workplace had a woman with RA working there and she had to quit finally - mainly because of the very physical nature of the work and because she was always off sick. It's only now we know that she had RA that we have realised how daunting that must have been for her in retrospect.

I believe we all need to keep supporting NRAS to campaign to increase the general public's awareness about what having this disease means. I also think, as others have said many times, that emphasising the arthritic element creates a problem with how the disease is perceived. But as that is unlikely to alter anytime soon it is good that it's known as RA and the more widely it's symptoms are publicised the better for all of us.

I observed that when the Mail covered the topic last month the comments got hijacked by people with other diseases such as MS and OA. It's not that those diseases aren't as bad in their own way but they are very different and the thing that makes RA so hard is other people's lack of awareness of what it means to have it and implications on the workplace for many. The other night someone who sits on our health board commented on my splints at a party. I explained and he said "oh snap I have diabetes!" I know diabetes is another rotten disease (3 members of my family had it) but I don't think it brings with it chronic pain or disables you- nor does it get treated by such toxic drugs.

There might come a time to stop smiling and tell people at work how it really is for you Susan? Good luck x

susanh profile image
susanh

There is smiling and there is a time just to give up. Hard to judge

I will just have to smile at the moment and find the right moment

Susan xx

I know exactly what you mean - but if we can smile in a steely manner before administering a lethal sting to those who are messing about with us surely? These people need to learn the hard way sometimes. TTx

Gina_K profile image
Gina_K

My boss has never even mentioned it to me about Ra if I'm there he expects 100 per cent that why I don't feel one bit guilty now I'm on certified sick since October, he never even sent me a card! ' What goes around comes around 'as my dear old nana used to say, I sure won't be rushing back there. Big meeting with my GP on Wed to discuss, er why I won't be going back to work for the forseeable, well not till the money runs out anyway!!!

Xx Gina.

Sorry to hear your boss is being unsupportive!

Mine were pretty good to start, but are now showing there true colours, so I know how you feel!

After working for them for almost 18 years I find it heartbreaking that they treat me like a number! No compasion just got to be seen to treat everyone the same they say! Well sorry but Im not missing monday morning cause I have handgover (chance would be a fine thing) Im missing it cause I cant bloody walk or get out off bed, and If I miss the morning I normally try to get in the afternoon and am totally willing to work from home, which they were fine with at first until some off the other girls started getting bitchy and saying they would like to work from home!

Well I'll swap them my ra for there wishes!!

Hope your ok, try not to let the b**stools get you down!

susanh profile image
susanh in reply to

b***stools just about covers it. I have had to beg to get Friday off to take my husband to a scan for his MS. I am just a little sick of how people peak to me. I wore my pressure gloves in the office today and the looks. One comment was is she competing with her husband and try to get off work sick nice eh.

You are so right I would sway RA for their moans any day

in reply to susanh

Omg!!

I cant beleive you are putting up with crap like that!!

I would report whoever is saying comments like that to your boss and if your boss dont do anything about it I would seak advise from citezens advise.

susanh profile image
susanh in reply to

I think a trip to the CAB would be a godd idea. i am trying to get out but not getting much luck at the mo

Try try and try again eh!!!!

Hi, just wondering if you belong to a Trade Union.

I had a similar miserable time at work, always the one with the brave smile!! Trying my best! Perhaps that's why no one took my problems seriously enough. We don't like to make a fuss do we? (I sometimes think we RA fighters are so much stronger than the ordinary able-bodied.What we have to put up with! )

Anyway, I needed help but had a bully-boss. So luckily my Union rep was prepared to speak up for me. Its amazing the difference having the union behind you makes. I got equipment, and some funding so I could do less hours for full pay. It was called "Access to Work" but I don't know if it still exists.

Hope things improve for you.

susanh profile image
susanh in reply to

Mo i am not in a trade union although at the mo I think it would make things worse.

I have decided to look for part time work as I am not going to get any where

cathie profile image
cathie

I wish I'd scaled down my working hours when I first had RA. Its so important to sort yourself out. Good luck,

Cathie

susanh profile image
susanh in reply to cathie

I am trying but as the only wage earner the discisson is hard

will get there eventually

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