Please help

I am not doing well at all I've read Allen Carr and have 25g patch and brought mini tabs but been trying for a 2 week and just keep breaking down I had a abnormal smear about 3 weeks ago and am waiting on results convinced I have cancer and has brought on major anxiety attacks I'm on medication for it and in process of receiving counselling but I can't stop smoking 😢 even though I'm terrified of having cancer and know I have to I keep asking doctors and they just say it's not a good time but every time I smoke I cry I need to stop and I want to stop but I just don't believe I can ...has any one please got any advice I want to see my kiddies grow up x

9 Replies

  • Quitting smoking is a massive decision to make, most of us were frightened of coping with life without cigs but I can assure you life is better without them. You are in a worrying and stressful time just now but you know smoking is adding to your stress not helping at all. Read Allen Carrs book again, it took me a couple of reads to get the message and found it tremendously helpful. Joining this forum is a great idea too so much help and support from other quitters who have all struggled in those early days of quitting so understand what your going through. I am sure others will post and offer you support and advise.

  • Thank you x I did quit as soon as my results were in and didn't smoke for just over a week had the colposcopy appointment and that night anxiety kicked in big time ended up at crisis they prescribed medication as they said it's just the tipping of the iceberg and I've burnt out through stresses in life but I just wanted a smoke 😢 so brought some before calling 111 and getting refered now I'm struggling to stop again im in a permament state of anxiety and can't handle the peaks so grab a roll up im so stupid I know it doesn't help and it's causing the anxiety but I can't seem to get through a peek without panicking hence I thought I join here maybe try and see that anxiety is normal part and try and rationalise it rather than thinking I'm going insane 😢 but thank you for taking the time to reply x

  • Shellymummy, so sorry to hear you're having such a horrid time.

    It's no comparison, but when my dad was initially diagnosed with cancer, I stopped smoking immediately. For 5 days. Then more results came back, and stressed me out, and I started again. And like you, every time I lit up, I cried, fought with myself, knew exactly how stupid I was being. But I just couldn't stop then, because I was in too wobbly a state of mind. We all know how risky smoking is, we all know it's a horribly dangerous game to play, but it's not as if we really DECIDE to keep smoking. It's an addiction. So please don't beat yourself up over it. You need to be in a strong frame of mind to fight this effectively.

    I used my dad's illness to strengthen my resolve. But it took time to prepare myself for the Final Quit. And when I was ready, a few weeks later, I stopped, and that was that. I just didn't allow myself to contemplate smoking again - I think Allen Carr says something about that - the only way to be happy about not smoking is to not consider it an option (massively paraphrasing, haven't read it for a year or so! But so much of what he says makes total sense, and I owe a lot of my quit to the several times over several years that i read him).

    So I really think you can do this, and I think the time's near.

    Stick with us, we'll help as much as we can. I found reading and posting really beneficial - still do.

    Take care, and I hope things look up for you. x

  • Hello shelly, So pleased to have you with us.

    It's good to deal with own situation at a time my lovely.

    Now abnormal cells, are just that, abnormal, abnormal cells are quite common in women including my self, I was treated years and years ago, all was ok, and while I can't stop you worrying., I,m sure you will feel so much better when results are in.

    It's like all has come crashing down on you all together.

    You can quit smoking, we've all had those horrid craves, and have learned to over ride them untill they become less and less, and indeed they do. We ar e no different to you, I also used the patch method, was great for me.

    Please please post and read often, if you want to quit those fags, it's only ever a good thing.

    I,m wishing you well , take it hour by hour, lots of water and boild sweets

    Please keep us posted

  • Hi Shellymummy, I agree with incy on this one, perhaps give it a couple of weeks while you prepare to stop. I had a v similar experience a few years back, worrying about abnormal cells and trying to stop smoking - I just couldn't do both at the same time. Be gentle with yourself it's not an easy time x

  • Thank you everyone for your kind words I have decided tomorrow is quit day and am currently reading Alan Carr again and just go for it, I need to stop for my own sanity I think 60% of it is because I'm smoking rather than life but I'm determined to give it 100% it's hard as I have no one to talk to hubby doesn't smoke and with 5 kids at home hardly a relaxing atmosphere and all my friends either tell me just to carry on till results are back or think I'm insane to even still be smoking and worried, this morning was just too hard I worked myself into a frenzy within 30minutes of waking but I think this will help talking here and reading others it's just hard to think rational at the minute xx but thank you again it's helping me make my mind up I can do it I just have to get the courage to jump

  • Morning Shelly, how are you feeling today?

    I'm hoping you have a better day to day

  • Hi sorry didn't see this yesterday had a awful day with anxiety etc have decided to stop taking my tablets as the side effects are horrendous spent the day sweating, feeling ill and like I was drunk...not good with 5 kids so now I'm soooo unsure what to do as I obviously still have anxiety problems but their mainly caused by bad thoughts about colop so then I'm smoking and feeling like a huge failure keep trying to stop brought some patches the 24 hour ones but still woke this morning and have had 3 since 5.30 am I want to stop I just can't make myself belief I can stop :-( but thank you for asking x

  • Morning Shelly ☺ it sounds like you are having such a difficult time. Look up the medication you are taking online (or check with docs tomorrow) sometimes the side effects only last a week or so. Why not let the medication take effect, have your hospital app and make a date to quit after that?

    What I'm starting to learn is that I can only deal with one thing at a time, that way you give yourself a chance to make progress in each thing.

    Hope your day improves ☺

You may also like...