Are we ever really free???

I,ve so been thinking, are we really ever free of this terrible addiction? It seems to me we have so many long term quitters, do we use this forum as a sort of resolve, in our quest to stay smoke free.??? It's like I have a trap door that's bolted on the out side, if I undo it I could easily smoke I know I could while I don't want to smoke, I,m not sure if freedom ever really happens, do we fight it for ever?

I,m just wondering what our penthouse members thoughts are on this subject ?

9 Replies

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  • Basically what Kat said, not much more to add to that if you wanted the template quit feeling after a certain length of time.

  • Hi Tracy I am on day 124 and I was feeling exactly like you. But recently I remembered that when I used to smoke a cigarette I really wanted to finish it quick....so I could have my next one really soon. I know that might sound stupid but it was how I was thinking.I smoked around 22 a day so obviously I wasn't lighting up straight away but that was how I felt. It's one of the things I think of now when I get a crave,and I think....what's the point I know I would want another one quickly after that one...and so on.... That's how I'm staying free...for the moment anyway.

  • I can sympathise with you Tracey, that was a total shocker to me. I thought we are different from people who quit drinking or using drugs. I don't believe I'll ever be truly free in that sense. On the other hand, it seems like some successfully changed their attitude and mindset, so what is not possible for some, might be for others.

    All that is directly connected with Kat's thoughts - it all depends on how you approach your quit. I now see that this is my first truly serious quit and how little I knew about all this when I decided to stop smoking. I can honestly say I would probably wait a couple of more years if I knew how serious quitting is...for me! Don't get me wrong, I am glad I quit. It just gets some time getting used to, like all things in life - weather you consider them good or bad. And once you do, you reach the freedom. At least that's how I imagine it.

  • I don't think we have to battle forever. I very rarely think about it now and when I do it's with a sense of relief that I don't have to do it. I think the longer your quit the more you see the true reality of smoking when you do encounter it. I find the smell on people disgusting and having to visit a 'smoking house' is now unpleasnant for the first few minutes til I get acclimatised!

    I think the 'rose tinted glasses' rears it's head occasionaly and can derail a long term quit, as Kat said that cigarette on holiday appears attractive. I am still very much actively protecting myself against this one and might well be for a few years to come BUT it's not a battle like the first 3 months it's more a defensive stance and I didn't need it at all over Xmas and New Year.

  • Sue has put it very well when she says it is less a battle and more a defensive stance as you get further down the quit road. I'm approximately three months ahead of you Tracey and I can say without a shadow of a doubt that I know- fundamentally- that I will never smoke again. The switch in my head flipped and I can see no reason why it should ever flip back the other way. Having said that, I also know that the receptors in my brain could be reawakened all too easily if I ever let that background defensive stance slip. I think your analogy of the trap-door is an excellent one- we've succeeded in locking the door tightly shut and have no intentions of ever opening the door again, but for us former smokers the door will always be there.

    I can, however, say hand on heart that any thoughts of smoking these days are extremely fleeting and (thankfully) very easy to deal with. :)

  • Yep you become free, you don't forget but even when I get off my face on beer there isn't a risk of me smoking. Smoking is something from a past life, a memory but not a temptation.

    Quitting the forum can be a little tougher.

  • Bit of both Lostie, I'll drop you a PM

  • THANKYOU all. It is so very helpful to be for armed for the future, with more knowledge.

    It would appear we all DSL with this situation differently, as I would expect, as indeed we are all very individual people.

    Thanks again

  • I never think about smoking at all. I'm just glad I don't smoke anymore and it doesn't bother me one bit. I can be around smokers all day and I couldn't care less.

    To be honest, after I hadn't smoked for about 3 weeks, it was just a relief to me. I badly didn't want to smoke while I was smoking, and as soon as I got over the main withdrawal symptoms, I was just so glad to not be doing something so harmful anymore.

    I use this forum to pass the time and offer the odd bit of advice.

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