Never give up

It's nearly 24 hours since I 'signed the no smoking pledge' again and thanks to the wonderful support I've received from my friends on here since yesterday I am feeling ready to get on with my quit.

For those of you who are reading my ramblings for the first time I am the type of quitter who can abstain for fairly long periods of time without experiencing too many problems. Unfortunately it's my long term staying power that I seem to have trouble with.

I know that most ex-smokers are always going to experience the odd fleeting thoughts that it would be nice to have just one more smoke, and that these thoughts are usually triggered by stressful situations (more often than not the kind of situation that, after a good night's sleep, isn't really worth worrying about at all). Whatever the reason I think we all know that smoking is no solution to any problem, I certainly know that I should.

In my case though, and if I am brutally honest, I think I give in far too easily. I actually think I just use these situations (which are usually something and nothing) as an excuse to smoke again and I do think that probably quite a few would be quitters are exactly the same.

I am beginning to wonder if the initial part of quitting is the easiest and I never thought I would say that. It seems that nicotine is very clever and can hang around in our brain just waiting for any opportunity to lure us back to smoking. This is most likely to happen when we are feeling a bit vulnerable or fragile so we have to be on our guard continually.

I seem to be learning more and more about this quit business all the time though and, even if it takes me forever, I am determined never to give up on giving up.

Evie x

22 Replies

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  • Now thats more like the Evie i know :D

    Well said and yep your right and you also know its doable by doing it one min then one hour then 2 etc etc

    so onwards and upwards and never ever ever stop giving up

    sending hugs to you my brave friend :)

    Carol x

  • Evie well said and yes there is truth in the nic monster having a good way of playing the waiting game, but hopefully armed with these findings we'l be able to stay smoke free :D

    Sian xx

  • Well done for getting back on it Evie, your determination is inspiring, fingers crossed this time is your quit forever xx

  • one day at a time , small steps lead to big ones, only concern yourself with getting thru today worry about tommorow when it comes if you try looking too much into long term goals it can overwhelm and we can actually set ourselves up i feel the best way is to set yourself lots and lots of short term achievable goals that are easy thats what ive done you will get there you have done 2 and a half months so you have proven that you dont need nicotine stay focused and think more short term goals you can do this

    cheers

    gra

    Eleven months, 2 hours, 29 minutes and 5 seconds. 20166 cigarettes not smoked, saving $11,494.74. Life saved: 10 weeks, 30 minutes.

  • Good luck with this quit Evie, as Gra said take it one day at a time and never give up giving up:D

  • Only 5 weeks to Christmas and I'm looking forward to my first smokefree one for years - the best present I could wish for.

    It's great to be able to share this quit with people who are non judgmental and it feels good to know we're all in this together.

    Thanks everyone, your support and help is much appreciated.

    Evie x

  • Hi Evie

    Nice to meet you :)

    I know exactly what you mean about the "any little excuse" part of quitting.

    I think I am at that stage, looking for a way out, but it aint happening...so there! :)

    I wish you all the luck and determination in the world this time.

    And as you mentioned it, can I be the first to wish you a very merry Christmas!

    :D

    I was dreading Christmas coming but now I'm going to embrace it.

    Somebody crank up Slade! :D

    Good luck

    Greg

    x

  • I too am looking forward to my first non smoking Christmas in as long as I can remember. Me and the family are staying with other family in York for Christmas and it will be so nice not to have to sneak out for a smoke in the morning before we do the present opening etc with the kids. Can't wait.

  • I too am looking forward to my first non smoking Christmas in as long as I can remember. Me and the family are staying with other family in York for Christmas and it will be so nice not to have to sneak out for a smoke in the morning before we do the present opening etc with the kids. Can't wait.

    Hi Doug

    Now that to me sounds like a man that wants to quit for good :)

    Good for you

    cheers

    Greg

  • I think I'm quite a similar quitter, I've done it numerous times and on occasions for reasonable periods but if I'm not 100% focused then it doesn't take much to give in. Having said that, it's also taught me that smoking satisfies nothing apart from your craving and only briefly at that so therefore this time smoking is not an option. Good luck and stay strong, this time we can do it for good!

  • Hi Doug

    Now that to me sounds like a man that wants to quit for good :)

    Good for you

    cheers

    Greg

    As the old saying goes, "If you want to give up, you'll give up". I never believed that before when I failed on my last quit attempts but am beginning to believe it now. During my last attempts, I was miserable and would look longingly at smokers thinking how unfair it was that they could smoke and I couldn't. Now I look at smokers and think - I did that to myself for how long!!!I'm only about 10 days off and am still getting cravings but the last thing I would dream of is going to the shop to buy fags. Why would I do that? I've stopped smoking - for good.

  • Well done Doug, you're doing great.

    I have to admit that I never envied smokers. Even when I was 'enjoying' it myself I always felt a bit guilty and knew it was something I shouldn't really be doing - the price alone should have been enough to put me off before I even started to consider the damage I could have been doing to my health.

    I think I've got past the cravings stage or at least I'm able to manage them now so I hope my willpower will see me through this time.

    It's just so strange that I when I know I can go for months without smoking that I should be tempted back in a moment of madness or as some would say weakness on my part. I am trying so hard this time not to let myself down again.

    As I said, I'm aiming for a smokefree Christmas and it would be the icing on the cake if I could go into the New Year as an ex-smoker.

    Keep Going Everyone.

    Evie x

  • It's just so strange that I when I know I can go for months without smoking that I should be tempted back in a moment of madness or as some would say weakness on my part. I am trying so hard this time not to let myself down again.

    I'm starting to get intrigued by these "moments of madness" that you have (I don't think it's weakness by the way). What situations have triggered these moments of madness in the past? What exactly happens? What are you thinking/feeling? It would be interesting to know. :)

  • I'm not mad really Biggrin. The 'moments of madness' I referred to were really just a couple of unexpected, stressful situations that I was finding difficult to deal with.

    In my 'moments of madness' I stupidly resorted to smoking. I suppose I used it as my coping mechanism - well that was my excuse but of course it didn't solve anything except to make me feel a failure.

    I wouldn't care but I consider myself to be a fairly resilient and responsible person really, other than where my horrible smoking addiction is concerned.

    I do know that smoking is a double edged sword for me - I don't want to do it anymore but deep down, and if I'm honest, I obviously still miss it, especially when the going gets tough.

    It's really hard to explain but I will keep trying to quit for good and I know I will do it eventually.

    Evie x

  • hI Evie,.....your post could have been written by me.I am an all or nothing type so after paffing about with a quit every mon I had to stop kidding myself.I dont want to ever smoke again,but know I cant get complacent as it can rear it ugly head anytime.

    Its been too easy I sometimes think.

    Well done anyway.

  • I'm not mad really Biggrin. The 'moments of madness' I referred to were really just a couple of unexpected, stressful situations that I was finding difficult to deal with.

    I didn't think you are mad, Evie!

  • Hi! I got to day 5 without a ciggarette! But then caved - so I guess tomorrow I will be on day 1 again :( So annoyed, I was so pleased with myself, didn't think that I could do it. Problems with the taxman suddenly changing my tax code and not getting much money (£142 for a fortnight) and then sent proper tax code to work - but they say that they have not got it!! Who pays the bills? So stressed out I had a fag this evening :mad:

  • hI Evie,.....your post could have been written by me.I am an all or nothing type so after paffing about with a quit every mon I had to stop kidding myself.I dont want to ever smoke again,but know I cant get complacent as it can rear it ugly head anytime.

    Its been too easy I sometimes think.

    Well done anyway.

    Thanks CarolRose

    It's good to know I'm not the only one who this happens to.

    We're heading in the right direction though so let's hope we both get there in the end.

    Evie x

  • I am the very same, I have gotten a few weeks before and then stupidity or moments of madness as you call them would occure and I would smoke.

    I am on day one today, and every now and then the thought of a smoke enters my head and I go do something else. I am useing champix so hopefully they will help me to resist. Like Doug I am looking forward to a smoke free christmas. I will confess though I am not going to any christmas parties as they will derail my efforts, get a few beers on board and my will power on defeating the urge to smoke dissapears. I am going for a few days ski ing in Germany in january and I am looking forward to breathing the lovely mountain air and not ruining it by smoking. ( I am also looking forward to not smelling like an ashtray);)

  • Biddypat you sound just like me but please think you need to avoid those pleasures, such as the Christmas parties, just because you think you might be tempted by the smokers there.

    I just can't explain it - I hate smoking and everything it stands for When I see smokers standing outside their places of work in the cold and rain I think they look absolutely ridiculous and then I realise just how hypocritical I am because I was just the same. Granted I didn't stand outside my workplace or smoke in front of others, no because for the last few years everyone thought I had packed in my silly habit. Of course they didn't know that secretly I was still smoking only now I chose to smoke alone in my back garden or garage where nobody else could see me, something that didn't make me feel good about myself but that allowed me to continue indulging in what I used to describe as my 'one weakness'.

    I am the type of serial quitter who on reflection used to look for any excuse to light up again because, if truth be told, I didn't have the bottle to see my quit through - I did (probably still do) miss smoking but I know I will learn to get on with life without. I know it is just a senseless waste of time and money.

    Now I have finally come to my senses and I know that it is up to me to quit, I have got to WANT this enough.

    I would say to you "Do not avoid the smokers", not if it means denying yourself the pleasure of going to social events just as a means of avoiding them. There are always going to be smokers around and probably most of them are like you and me and wish that they could just pack it in once and for all.

    We can do it if we want to, we've just got to be ready for those times when the old nicotine urge raises its ugly head and try to remember what we are doing and why.

    I am doing okay and looking forward to a smokefree Christmas as well as a smokefree holiday at the beginning of next month - no secret smoking on the balcony when I'm supposed to be getting ready.

    We've just got to have the courage of our convictions (sometimes easier said than done) and grit our teeth and bear it - we can do it though.

    Good luck.

    Evie x

  • Biddypat, I meant to say "Please DON'T think you need to avioid those situations such as Christmas parties".

    I think my brain cells are suffering since I started my quit.

    Evie x

  • Ha ha, I understood you Evie. I know what you mean about not avoiding parties as there will be smokers. I know I will be meeting smokers, I just want to get myself to a stage though where I am comfertable with them. Christmas parties are the sort of thing I always want to give a miss anyway, out with people I normaly wouldn't go out with etc. So If I went, I probably would over do the drinking and would then let myself in self pity because I would rather be at home, etc, then go outside to join the smokers. I too hate that standing outside thing. I always feel embarrassed to be there , and while I am there I wish I was a non smoker.

    I also did the tell the world I am not smoking, and smoke in secret. I never enjoyed them, and I was always miserable trying to think of an excuse to get away from my husband just so I could go smoke. Sod that for a game of soldiers this time I am staying quit, and I won't ruin holidays, days out, long trips on the train by always thinking of how I can fix my habit.

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