Never give up

It's nearly 24 hours since I 'signed the no smoking pledge' again and thanks to the wonderful support I've received from my friends on here since yesterday I am feeling ready to get on with my quit.

For those of you who are reading my ramblings for the first time I am the type of quitter who can abstain for fairly long periods of time without experiencing too many problems. Unfortunately it's my long term staying power that I seem to have trouble with.

I know that most ex-smokers are always going to experience the odd fleeting thoughts that it would be nice to have just one more smoke, and that these thoughts are usually triggered by stressful situations (more often than not the kind of situation that, after a good night's sleep, isn't really worth worrying about at all). Whatever the reason I think we all know that smoking is no solution to any problem, I certainly know that I should.

In my case though, and if I am brutally honest, I think I give in far too easily. I actually think I just use these situations (which are usually something and nothing) as an excuse to smoke again and I do think that probably quite a few would be quitters are exactly the same.

I am beginning to wonder if the initial part of quitting is the easiest and I never thought I would say that. It seems that nicotine is very clever and can hang around in our brain just waiting for any opportunity to lure us back to smoking. This is most likely to happen when we are feeling a bit vulnerable or fragile so we have to be on our guard continually.

I seem to be learning more and more about this quit business all the time though and, even if it takes me forever, I am determined never to give up on giving up.

Evie x

22 Replies

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nsd_user663_49670

6 years ago

Well done Doug, you're doing great.

I have to admit that I never envied smokers. Even when I was 'enjoying' it myself I always felt a bit guilty and knew it was something I shouldn't really be doing - the price alone should have been enough to put me off before I even started to consider the damage I could have been doing to my health.

I think I've got past the cravings stage or at least I'm able to manage them now so I hope my willpower will see me through this time.

It's just so strange that I when I know I can go for months without smoking that I should be tempted back in a moment of madness or as some would say weakness on my part. I am trying so hard this time not to let myself down again.

As I said, I'm aiming for a smokefree Christmas and it would be the icing on the cake if I could go into the New Year as an ex-smoker.

Keep Going Everyone.

I'm not mad really Biggrin. The 'moments of madness' I referred to were really just a couple of unexpected, stressful situations that I was finding difficult to deal with.

In my 'moments of madness' I stupidly resorted to smoking. I suppose I used it as my coping mechanism - well that was my excuse but of course it didn't solve anything except to make me feel a failure.

I wouldn't care but I consider myself to be a fairly resilient and responsible person really, other than where my horrible smoking addiction is concerned.

I do know that smoking is a double edged sword for me - I don't want to do it anymore but deep down, and if I'm honest, I obviously still miss it, especially when the going gets tough.

It's really hard to explain but I will keep trying to quit for good and I know I will do it eventually.

nsd_user663_53649

I am the very same, I have gotten a few weeks before and then stupidity or moments of madness as you call them would occure and I would smoke.

I am on day one today, and every now and then the thought of a smoke enters my head and I go do something else. I am useing champix so hopefully they will help me to resist. Like Doug I am looking forward to a smoke free christmas. I will confess though I am not going to any christmas parties as they will derail my efforts, get a few beers on board and my will power on defeating the urge to smoke dissapears. I am going for a few days ski ing in Germany in january and I am looking forward to breathing the lovely mountain air and not ruining it by smoking. ( I am also looking forward to not smelling like an ashtray)

Biddypat you sound just like me but please think you need to avoid those pleasures, such as the Christmas parties, just because you think you might be tempted by the smokers there.

I just can't explain it - I hate smoking and everything it stands for When I see smokers standing outside their places of work in the cold and rain I think they look absolutely ridiculous and then I realise just how hypocritical I am because I was just the same. Granted I didn't stand outside my workplace or smoke in front of others, no because for the last few years everyone thought I had packed in my silly habit. Of course they didn't know that secretly I was still smoking only now I chose to smoke alone in my back garden or garage where nobody else could see me, something that didn't make me feel good about myself but that allowed me to continue indulging in what I used to describe as my 'one weakness'.

I am the type of serial quitter who on reflection used to look for any excuse to light up again because, if truth be told, I didn't have the bottle to see my quit through - I did (probably still do) miss smoking but I know I will learn to get on with life without. I know it is just a senseless waste of time and money.

Now I have finally come to my senses and I know that it is up to me to quit, I have got to WANT this enough.

I would say to you "Do not avoid the smokers", not if it means denying yourself the pleasure of going to social events just as a means of avoiding them. There are always going to be smokers around and probably most of them are like you and me and wish that they could just pack it in once and for all.

We can do it if we want to, we've just got to be ready for those times when the old nicotine urge raises its ugly head and try to remember what we are doing and why.

I am doing okay and looking forward to a smokefree Christmas as well as a smokefree holiday at the beginning of next month - no secret smoking on the balcony when I'm supposed to be getting ready.

We've just got to have the courage of our convictions (sometimes easier said than done) and grit our teeth and bear it - we can do it though.

Good luck.

Ha ha, I understood you Evie. I know what you mean about not avoiding parties as there will be smokers. I know I will be meeting smokers, I just want to get myself to a stage though where I am comfertable with them. Christmas parties are the sort of thing I always want to give a miss anyway, out with people I normaly wouldn't go out with etc. So If I went, I probably would over do the drinking and would then let myself in self pity because I would rather be at home, etc, then go outside to join the smokers. I too hate that standing outside thing. I always feel embarrassed to be there , and while I am there I wish I was a non smoker.

I also did the tell the world I am not smoking, and smoke in secret. I never enjoyed them, and I was always miserable trying to think of an excuse to get away from my husband just so I could go smoke. Sod that for a game of soldiers this time I am staying quit, and I won't ruin holidays, days out, long trips on the train by always thinking of how I can fix my habit.

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