Energy

I somehow get that deja vu feeling, as if I've posted this already but can't find it any more.

I'm a late starter, was about 24 (Kung Fu until then and the teacher would have literally thrown me out the door) when I started smoking. Since then have quit one time for about a year and could feel the surge in energy I got. That's my main reason.

Apparently, the last time I quit for the wrong reasons coz I always had a craving for fags and started on purpose again when the company sent me on an assignment to Russia, the job was done in 6 month but the smoking stayed.

I've long lived under the illusion that if I'd be living at home where fags are real money it would be easier to quit. Nonsense! Went home in 2001, stayed for a month and didn't even think of quitting.

So here it goes once more just for me:

1. Energy

2. Wastes my time

3. Most likely does some damage to my health

4. Have to sneak out during meetings, which doesn't look good for the position i'm in and consequently for my future (actually a good reason, i love my job, shouldn't be on 4.)

5. Still looking for a girlfriend/wife

I don't really expect anyone to read this, I must admit I do this for myself. Roughly 36 hours to go until my first attempt with the help of this forum. I'm afraid, very afraid of failing again.

So here I am, out in the open, somebody who usually keeps to himself, never goes out, pushes the expression 'computer geek' to the extreme, typing this and crying coz I'm scared s******s now already.

Mods, if you find that i've posted this elsewhere already then please delete it. I did a few searches but couldn't find it. Thanks

15 Replies

oldestnewest
  • I somehow get that deja vu feeling, as if I've posted this already but can't find it any more.

    So here it goes once more just for me:

    1. Energy

    2. Wastes my time

    3. Most likely does some damage to my health

    4. Have to sneak out during meetings, which doesn't look good for the position i'm in and consequently for my future (actually a good reason, i love my job, shouldn't be on 4.)

    5. Still looking for a girlfriend/wife

    I don't really expect anyone to read this, I must admit I do this for myself. Roughly 36 hours to go until my first attempt with the help of this forum. I'm afraid, very afraid of failing again.

    So here I am, out in the open, somebody who usually keeps to himself, never goes out, pushes the expression 'computer geek' to the extreme, typing this and crying coz I'm scared s******s now already.

    Biox

    Dont be afraid of failing, i failed and failed and failed but at last i have got my head together and i know this time I am going to do it. If you fall down get back up the very next day and try again.... dont leave it ... keep trying.. learn to hate those cigarettes so much, that was an important part for me. I grew to hate them and myself for smoking them!!

    Im on day four now and I have to say days one and two were not bad, yesterday was a horror !!! But today i have woke up and I can feel the difference, even after 3 nights of disturbed sleep my body knows it is not being poisoned and I can feel a difference in the energy levels... already !!

    COME ON YOU CAN DO THIS.....

    STAY STRONG LIKE THE ENGLISH BULL TERRIER

    EBT GIRL

    ;)

  • Hi Biox :D

    EBTGirl is right don't be afraid honestly there is no need to be and how you ask could I know

    That's a very simple question and the answer

    Because I like many others on this forum have a whole lot of failed quits behind me I smoked for over 50 yrs and only once quit for more than a few days/weeks and that was for a year, then there was a death in the family and back I went to my crutch

    Then after talking to my Son one day he said he'd quit and about this forum and how it helped him after thinking about it for a few weeks I woke up one day and said that's it no more and I have now been quit for almost 5 months and only very occasionally get a fleeting thought about fags and then only when I do something for the first time since quitting

    So having said all that I promise you don't need to dread this OK

    Yes you'll have a few hard days but you'll also get a lot more easy ones, they easily outway the bad and you'll find all the help and support you need on here as we all fight the same battle, for our health and wellbeing

    So rather than being down hearted look forward to being finally free af that addiction we all have

    I now know that I will never again smoke another cigarette.I really hope this has helped to make you less frightened at the thought of quitting because the thought of actually stopping is far worse than the actual quit, also the benefits will kick in very quickly as well, you'll feel better, look better, have more energy oh and you won't stink of fags anymore and a whole host of others as well

    Love

    Marg xxxxxxxx

  • Hi Biox, Marg is so right, you don't have to be scared. Like you it was the a real fear for me, the thought of stopping. The fear of stopping is the reason I smoked for about 30 years. I knew it was 'bad' for me, that thought that one day something 'might' happen. No I think I believed that I would be one of the lucky ones and get away with it. I had to believe that because I was so scared of stopping.

    Reading the Allen Carr book helped me. He goes alot into why smokers are scared to quit and alot of it was as though I was reading about myself.

    I can honestly say that the first feeling I had when I began to quit was that I felt suprised and relieved that it wasn't scary. The benefits are huge and for me have been with days of quitting. This forum is amazing and I have not relapsed and had even a puff since I first logged on

    PLEASE DON'T BE SCARED WE'LL ALL HELP YOU. Give it a go and I bet you'll be suprised.

  • Thanks for the replies you three :)

    I'm not afraid any more already :D maybe just a little bit :o

    I know I would be happy if I could stop it. I haven't told anyone but you here on the forum so the phone will be off, Sat. night the fags left go down the toilet, I will be calm and relaxed.......I hope

    Funny part is, can you imagine how it stinks in my cave. It's getting warmer here so I have to run the aircon, all windows, doors closed. After about an hour I have to open the door coz i can't see myself any more. Blowing all the aircon money out into the open. How idiotic can it get?

    This time it's got to work otherwise I'm really worthless.:mad:

  • Hi Biox, Marg is so right, you don't have to be scared. Like you it was the a real fear for me, the thought of stopping. The fear of stopping is the reason I smoked for about 30 years. I knew it was 'bad' for me, that thought that one day something 'might' happen. No I think I believed that I would be one of the lucky ones and get away with it. I had to believe that because I was so scared of stopping.

    Reading the Allen Carr book helped me. He goes alot into why smokers are scared to quit and alot of it was as though I was reading about myself.

    I can honestly say that the first feeling I had when I began to quit was that I felt suprised and relieved that it wasn't scary. The benefits are huge and for me have been with days of quitting. This forum is amazing and I have not relapsed and had even a puff since I first logged on

    PLEASE DON'T BE SCARED WE'LL ALL HELP YOU. Give it a go and I bet you'll be suprised.

    Yeah, i've read Allen Carr countless times, but good idea anyway, I've got it on the computer and will re-read some passages tomorrow evening.

    Actually very difficult to surprise me but in this case I would be very, very surprised.

  • Hi Bioxx :D

    I am really pleased that you're no longer so afraid that's a definite step in the right direction

    Also glad you're going to flush any remaining fags down the toilet the best place for them HA HA

    Yes I can imagine how your home smells mine smelled just like it urghhhhhh

    It rarely gets hot enough here to want air conditioning but I can remember sometimes having to open the doors or windows to let some of the smog out and in winter that meant I lost heat as well another waste of money

    By the way you say if it doesn't work you'll be worthless!!!

    No one is WORTHLESS I repeat no one and this time you're going to succeed repeat after me This time I will succeed OK

    Try saying it out loud if necessary if/when a crave hits you'll find it will help

    Love

    Marg xxxxxxxx

  • This time I will succeed, said aloud, saved as file and set to launch during boot up, first thing I'm going to see on the screen.

    LOL I jump at every little help I can get, I will have to manage the first few hours w/o your excellent support coz GMT+7 but I'll handle that by reading what has been posted in the forum over my night.

    Unfortunately there are no support groups in Thailand for foreigners, only for Thais but smoking is not a recognised addiction here.

    Thank all of you and good night for now, yeah I need my beauty sleep and I get up at 4.

  • Hi, and welcome to the forum. Fear is the main reason I smoked for 35 years! I didn't know what I'd do without the cancer sticks! I used them as a reward after finishing any task. You know, do the dishes, have a cig. I used them when I felt stressed, so I wouldn't feel like beating kids when they were getting on my nerves, lol. So, what was I going to do without them? I still function pretty well, and I havn't had a cig for almost 3 months. I can still do everything I did before, only faster and I have so much more time to do the things I need to do and want to do. Quitting didn't hurt me. I was afraid I would have serious withdrawals, you know the kind where you're rolling on the floor and screaming at everyone! No such thing. Only some thoughts that I would like to have a cig, but I choose not to smoke. That's what you have to do, choose not to smoke. It's that simple. Read everything you can. Education is very important to your quit. The more you know the better off you are. And remember, there is nothing to fear!

  • Hi bioxx :D

    We will all give you all the support and help we can, there is always someone around OK

    Love Marg xxxxxx

  • Yup.... what Marg said :) We'll be here for you! Listen..... I KNOW panic attacks when it came to quitting and I just want you to know that they do NOT last. Yes.... you will think about smokes.... A LOT.... and you will hate it and wonder 'when will I feel normal again and not think of them damn fags'...... and then it will happen..... just like Allen Carr says..... 3 weeks or so and your body will not miss them any longer..... I suggest a hypnosis cd to work on the mind stuff to cut down on the 'being obsessed' part.....

    You are 14 hours ahead of me!!! Crazy :D No matter.... will try to catch you on here anyways :D

    PS - STOP psyching yourself out! The truth is the quit is not that bad.... it is the way you think about it. So find that place inside you and be calm and happy..... cause you are about to be a non-smoker and that means FREEDOM

    See around :D

  • Thanks for all the replies. Didn't expect that, really.

    Somehow, in some very sinister way, that reading here seems to do 'something' to me:confused: It's Saturday morning and I know that it's supposed to be my last day of smoking. Usually I would seriously panic already but for some reason I feel normal ....... whatever normal means in my case.:) I know that this doesn't come from me still smoking, during the past attempts I smoked until the last minute as well. So what is it? It's gotta be you.

  • Hi, and welcome to the forum. Fear is the main reason I smoked for 35 years! I didn't know what I'd do without the cancer sticks! I used them as a reward after finishing any task. You know, do the dishes, have a cig. I used them when I felt stressed, so I wouldn't feel like beating kids when they were getting on my nerves, lol. So, what was I going to do without them? I still function pretty well, and I havn't had a cig for almost 3 months. I can still do everything I did before, only faster and I have so much more time to do the things I need to do and want to do. Quitting didn't hurt me. I was afraid I would have serious withdrawals, you know the kind where you're rolling on the floor and screaming at everyone! No such thing. Only some thoughts that I would like to have a cig, but I choose not to smoke. That's what you have to do, choose not to smoke. It's that simple. Read everything you can. Education is very important to your quit. The more you know the better off you are. And remember, there is nothing to fear!

    Sounds somehow familiar, although I don't feel like beating kids. At least I wouldn't try it with my students, there're usually 60 of them, aged 24-26 and 50% of them are women, I don't beat women, nevaa evaa:)

    Anyway, what you are saying is precisely right, there is no real withdrawal pain, cramps, vomiting and the like, it's just in the blaady brain. I wish I could turn the sub concious part off for a few days, that's where the bodies are buried, smoking isn't really a concious 'decision'. Allen Carr repeats this time and again and he's right, of course.

    When I read his book the first time some light years ago I had to smile at his admission that he couldn't change a light bulb w/o lighting up first coz climbing on the chair would get him too far away from his beloved fags. I'm not smiling any more coz I've managed to get myself into the situation. Can't turn the washing machine on w/o lighting up first. This thing stands a whooping 3 metres away from where I'm sitting and the idiocy is that I don't even take the fag along, I put it in the ashtray and let it burn away.

  • Hi Bioxx :D

    That rings bells for me I was just like you and the majority of people on here Had a fag before doing something to get me there than another afterwards as a reward for doing it what a sad lot we are/were

    But I don't do that now and life is so much better and easier for me, no longer having to make sure I don't run out, looking for somewhere to smoke when I'm out

    Yes I am much, much happier without those blasted fags and so will you be

    Love

    Marg xxxxxxx

  • Hi Bioxx :D

    That rings bells for me I was just like you and the majority of people on here Had a fag before doing something to get me there than another afterwards as a reward for doing it what a sad lot we are/were

    But I don't do that now and life is so much better and easier for me, no longer having to make sure I don't run out, looking for somewhere to smoke when I'm out

    Yes I am much, much happier without those blasted fags and so will you be

    Love

    Marg xxxxxxx

    I want to be just as happy. For some strange reason i remember the energy I gained when i quit the last time for a year or so (long ago) and i want this back. Please:)

  • Hi Bioxx :D

    There is nothing to stop you having that again

    You really can have it all back you just have to quit OK

    We're all here for you whwnever you need us Promise

    Love

    Marg xxxxxxxxx

You may also like...