4 whole calender months on the 18th Dec

Hi I havent been on for a while. Its been 4 months on the 18th DEC, and if Im honest I am going through a hard stage. I had my friends babys funeral on Friday and it was the most horrific experience ever. My urge to have a cigarette was so strong but my friends wouldnt let me saying I'd done so well and come this far. I think this is because I was so depressed/stressed an dthe normal thing for me to do a few months ago would be to light up. Im pleased to say I didnt but the urge worried me.... Again, will it always be like this??..the wanting??....:(

3 Replies

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  • Well 1st off congrats on making it this far and as you can see its a journey!

    It seems to me that you need to experience and get through triggers before they don't bother you. You have not had to endure such a horrendous situation before and have years of learned behaviour to get beyond. Its a credit to you that you didn't crack but you know that it wouldn't help anything.

    The wanting eases, and getting rid of it is about changing your thinking so that you don't see quitting as a sacrifice. Just keep telling yourself that your gaining not losing and eventually you will be there.

    Best wishes.

    Nic

  • Hi EmWem,

    I have a feeling Nic is right...we can't face up our triggers 'til we come to them. We can do some groundwork and have some actions ready to DO when the moment arrives, but now and then there will come an strong urge to smoke triggered by a particular set of circumstances and conditioned responses.

    I lost my quit after 4 months...so. well done you. Each time you encounter a strong 'Need to smoke' moment and go beyond it, still not smoking, you get stronger and less likely to slide.

    It might help to write down, or rewrite, your reasons for wanting never to smoke another cigarette. And maybe one or two things to do when you need to move on from that place where you really WANT one!

    From your sad story to my ridiculous one, just to lighten the mood a bit....I started again because I was getting married the next day ,and I was sitting in the evening sun outside the pub with the c-a-n-a-l running along in front of the veranda and a lovely cold pint of lager, and my old matey, who had also been stopped, had a packet of aromatic golden virginia on the table....mad mad mad mad mad :confused:

    Such is life!

    Bill

  • I have a feeling Nic is right...we can't face up our triggers 'til we come to them. We can do some groundwork and have some actions ready to DO when the moment arrives, but now and then there will come an strong urge to smoke triggered by a particular set of circumstances and conditioned responses.

    I so agree with you both - I think thats why the first weeks are worse because you come up against so many triggers through a normal day. But once you've faced them about 20 times you feel strong about them.

    Some triggers will take years to get to 20 and that is my theory as to why years later you'll get an odd sudden urge. If you an@lysed it I bet you found yourself in a situation for the first time or at least one you don't find very often.

    I'm preparing for the 3 - 4 month scare. I get the idea you feel you've nailed it - I'm two months behind you exactly - hitting two months on the 18th December.

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