No will power

Hi I am a 68 year old male ,play golf 2 or 3 times a week ,plenty walks, but just had my 3rd mini stroke. I know it's my eating habits as I don't smoke .I need encouragement


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88 Replies

  • Welcome

    This is an amazing forum to be part of. Many of people on here have different areas of concern but we are all trying to get to, or maintain, our desired weight. As you get to know us, and share experiences with us, you will find what a super supportive bunch we are, and that we don't pass judgements.

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    Have a look at the NHS 12-week plan; many people have had success with it. Also use the BMI checker to find your target calories, it's important to eat enough. This can be a major turning point, realising you can eat anything as long as the calories are accounted for and are within your personal limit.

    Don't forget to take your starting measurements and a 'before' picture, as they can be very motivating on days that the scales refuse to co-operate; that happens to me quite regularly!

    The forum also has group weigh-ins every day, just choose which day you wish to weigh, join the post for that day and weigh in once per week. The Daily Diary is a very useful thread where we post our planned menu for the day, including calories if you count them, any exercise you have planned and any tips that you can share. The posts can always be found in the Events section on the 'home' page.

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    I wish you well as you get started with a new lifestyle.


  • Hi Alan. Sounds like you get plenty of exercise. My OH is a golfer. I daresay your doctor has given you a diet sheet, and it will say reduce alcohol and get your five a day. I make sure we get loads (and I mean loads!) of fresh fruit and veg at every meal, and little or no refined sugar (bought cakes, biscuits, puddings etc). Have a look at the Daily Diary posts to see what people are eating, and ask us, we are only too happy to help if we can.

  • Hi, thanks for your concern and advice. It's hard putting into practice though. I was brought up on mince and dumplings etc. And always had a pudding ( only if I ate my dinner all up ), got to give it a go this time' I virtually don't drink alcohol and must stop drinking soft drinks even no sugar ones.

  • I was also brought up on dumplings, and pasta, and potatoes (not the healthy sweet potato, but regular one). Just do one small step at a time. Slow changes tend to be the more permanent one. I'd encourage you to change 1 thin per week or even per 2 weeks ;) Slow and steady ;)

  • Hi there alanhinde48, and welcome to this busy place! We can certainly provide you with lots of encouragement!

    Do you enjoy cooking, or do you see preparing food to eat as a chore? Do you have the company of someone else when you eat, or is it a solitary thing? I'm asking you these questions, because it's very easy to dish out lots of advise and ideas, but I feel although you've provided us with a great introduction, we need to know more about you..??

    Are you happy to share with us what your weaknesses are?? We all have them :)

    There's no reason why you should have to skip your puddings - but we can help you to ensure that perhaps your choice of "a little something sweet" is a healthier one!

    If I had known how much better I would feel for changing my diet, I'd have done it many, many years ago! I started my journey at 49 years old, an going to be 55 next month, but I feel better now than I did in my thirties! :D :D

  • Hi. Thanks for taking the time to reply, what do I like to eat?, everything I shouldn't probably, peach melba to fish and chips. Sunday roasts followed by ice cream. Kit Kats to treacle toffee pudding.washed down with diet coke. Need encouragement badly as I don't like pasta or brown rice what about our lurpack butter?

  • I eat butter - just use it for cooking though, as I don't tend to eat much bread.

    I don't eat pasta and rice as I try to cut down on the carbohydrates, especially the processed stuff - as that is what can be the cause of visceral fat (the fat the grows on your insides, causes a large midriff!)

    I eat fish and chips and roast dinners (one of my favourite meals) BUT I am careful about how much I eat and I always eat lots of veg and not so many roast potatoes and Yorkshire puds! Not sure if you eat out a lot, but pub meals tend to be huge and much larger portions than we should be consuming.

    Any fizzy drinks (as I am sure you already know!) aren't very good :( I really didn't like water once upon a time, but I am now happy to glug down a pint of water.

    Do you cook? I am lucky as I love cooking, so I don't see it as a chore. My husband also likes cooking (when I let him get a look in!)

    We were discussing (husband and I) yesterday how much we both love treacle tart and clotted cream! He used to live in Chesterfield and we had the best ever treacle tart (with custard) there..... oooohhhhh. Just as well the pub owners moved on! We'd love a trip out to the pub just for that sweet treat!

  • Stop it your making me hungry, I don't mind cooking as long as you can pierce the film and put in the micro wave. Wife's a good cook though just had baked potato, Gammon, cauliflower cheese and peas followed by an Apple, not too bad, water instead of coke. So I'm giving it a go. Only had cereal for breakfast, any ideas for a snack later might have a beef drink for bedtime .Is this too boring?

  • That all sounds good! We had gammon steaks last night with fried egg, oven chips and some roast Mediterranean vegetables.

    Well done on the water. I hope that your wife is encouraging you in your efforts to change what you eat. My husband has been very supportive, which makes all the difference.

    Only you can answer if it's too boring! One thing I used to rely on as a late night "snack" was sugar-free jellies! Make up 4 and keep them in the fridge. Another low calorie "treat" are meringue nests, only about 54 calories each. Add some defrosted frozen berries (raspberries, cherries) and a spoonful of creme fraiche. Mmmmmm.... :-)

  • Keep the advice coming much appreciated, golf tomorrow, salad sandwich instead of bacon and fried egg for clubhouse snack and glass of soda and lime instead of milky coffee or shandy. The lads will be well impressed as they drink there beer and stuff their faces with the aforementioned fried sandwich.

  • Soda and blackcurrant is what I go for! Low in calories, also cheap! Don't let your golfing mates tease you (or should I say, don't let their teasing bother you...) It's your life and your body and you are responsible for what you put into it!

    Well done in making these changes - planning ahead for how you're going to deal with a particular situation (eg, a golf day) is REALLY sensible!

    Hope it doesn't rain!

  • Cheers, this lot will take the Mickey, but I Will give the sodta and black a try, at least I can pretend I'm drinking rum with it. Planning ahead is a good idea. Got to get out of the habit of eating biscuits with every cup of tea etc. Trying nuts and bits of carrot instead, and of course the water instead of tea or coffee takes the temptation away.

  • You sound like you're really thinking carefully about it which I think is half the battle.

  • I think another thing is to try and experiment and gradually find what works for you. How do you get to the golf course? I don't drink alcohol and have had many years of incredulous surprise when I'm out at a social occasion. Gradually I just took to saying 'I'm driving' to fend off the questions until I knew the people better and was ready to answer.

  • I've never drank and drove and have not had a drink as such for a long time now, my problem is, alas, eating badly. Listening to people like yourselves can only spur me on. Mind over matter ( or stomach ) will be the order of the day or months

  • Sorry, I hope I haven't caused offence? It was when you made the comment about pretending to drink rum with the soda and black - it sounded like you were being put upon. Mind over matter definitely the way to go.

  • No offence taking,I just wanted to emphasise what was the cause of my problem.

  • Well done you!

  • Love the sound of that pudding will try it soon

  • Definitely not too boring! Whatever you like and works for you. When I'm at work I have the same breakfast and lunch every day (and they aren't very exciting ones!) because they are quick, easy to prepare and eat and I don't have to think about it!

  • Things like jacket potato are common-place. No wonder strokes and heart disease are rife; they spike our hormones.

  • What do you recommend instead of baked potato, it was only a small one.

  • Low glycaemic alternatives such as sweet potato

  • Trying to, hope I can keep it going. Are you following any particular trends? If so give me some much needed advice.

  • I'm not sure what you mean by trends?

  • Sorry, diets, healthy eating etc.

  • Ah, I see - I'm just counting calories. Used the NHS BMI calculator to get my calorie range and do my best to stay within that. I plan my meals and snacks for each day and am doing my best to be rigorous about recording any tweaks or additions I make to it so that I am always on top of the calories. I haven't cut anything out or restricted my diet in anyway other than calories. In the past when I've followed any kind of plan I would get fed up at being told what to do by the plan. This way I make the choices and if I want to have a higher calorie thing then I do - I just need to make adjustments elsewhere. The reality is that I don't end up eating much of the less healthy things because they are too high in calories and I can't!

  • We don't do trends here, Alan, just healthy eating. Your wife cooks healthy, fresh food, by the sound of it. Why don't you try eating off a smaller plate? It's a trick which really works. I read somewhere that Sandi Toksvig did it for a year and lost two stone.

  • All good advice. Nice to know I'm not alone.

  • Have a good read of all the suggestions Ceals gave you this morning alanhinde48 there is a wealth of advice available on this forum 😊

  • Trying my best, anyway reading all this advice is really working. I have not had time to go to the fridge.

  • Well that's a good start! 😊

  • It's about breaking some habits. I remember that when I went to an NHS weightloss education group, there was a man there who had severe mobility problems because of his weight. There was a discussion about bread and I vividly remember him telling everyone quite proudly that he would never give up his two slices of bread and butter he had each day with his dinner! That would probably have added something like 300 calories to his meal!

  • I confess to loving bread and butter, but I do limit the quantity!!

  • Day 3 of my new health drive, bran flakes for breakfast, planning prawn salad for later.Plenty fruit in, just found out strawberries are not very good for you though. Tried your merinque tip with blueberries, and very nice it was too. Drinking plenty of water, no biscuits for 2 days, might treat myself to a couple of rich teas later.

  • Oh? I'm confused about strawberries? I thought that berries were some of the better fruits.... so I'll be interested to hear what you've found out about them!

    Glad that you enjoyed the meringue idea! Rich tea are probably not too evil in terms of calories - there are only so many you can eat of them, but somehow chocolate digestives go down a lot easier!

  • Strawberries supposedly are very high in natural sugars. I keep saying a couple won't do me any harm but if I say that about everything that is not good, who knows what harm its doing. Just read 4 or 5 Cadbury chocolate fingers quite low in calories.

  • Ah! I see.

    Ok, lets take a look at this comparison:

    4 x chocolate fingers - vs 400g (punnet) of fresh strawberries



    Calories (kcal)112

    Protein (g)3.2

    Carbohydrate (g)24

    Sugars (g)24

    Fat (g)0.4

    Saturates (g)0

    Fibre (g)5.4

    Sodium (g)0.0112


    Calories (kcal)123.6

    Protein (g)1.6

    Carbohydrate (g)14.6

    Sugars (g)8.4

    Fat (g)6.5

    Saturates (g)2.6

    Fibre (g)0.4

    Sodium (g)0.048

    Firstly, yes, on the face of it, strawberries look to have a much higher percentage of sugar than your chocolate fingers. BUT there is a big difference between how the body processes "naturally occurring" and "refined" sugars:

    Link on difference between naturally occurring sugars and "refined" sugar:

    Then look at the difference in the "saturated fat". 0g in the strawberries and 2.6g in the biscuits. 10% of the biscuit is saturated fat.

    I'm sure you already know that "saturated" fat is the "bad" fat that we are encouraged to limit?

    Fibre: Hmmm, well we all know that we should be eating more fibre, the strawberries win hands down!

    "5 a day" - Strawberries count as one of these! Chocolate biscuits do not!

    Sodium (read "salt") - 4 x more in the biscuits than in the strawberries! We are not talking huge quantities here, but it all adds up.

    and finally.....

    CAN YOU STOP AT 4 chocolate fingers ??? :D :D :D

  • Just put me off chocolate fingers....but will give strawberries a miss as well.....nectarines, Apple's, pears, grapes, peaches should be ok ...bought a few today along with sweet potatoes and twice as much veg as normal. And no biscuits, did buy sugar free jelly to make up.

  • Alan!!! I am MOST impressed :-) Sweet potatoes are very nice made into oven baked potato wedges - leave skin on, cut into wedges, drizzle with olive oil and bake in a hot oven for about 30-35 mins, add S&P and "voila"!

  • Sounds really nice. Keep the tips coming please. Going to watch the football tonight,I would normally pig out a bit, crisps,pickled unions, cheese, cream crackers and maybe a wee tipple, but not tonight.

  • Leicester / Arsenal?

  • Yes,be cheering on Leicester even though I'm a Newcastle fan.

  • Me too, I'm a man utd fan though.

  • You must live in London then....only kidding...I think Newcastle will struggle again this season....hope it doesn't send me back to binge eating

  • London, I know one what you mean lol but no I'm from northern Ireland. I have always liked the Newcastle fans though. Will be a hard season but I think you might stay up.

  • Could do with wealthy owners like your club. Mr Ashley just been saying he's only rich on paper his money's all tied up in sports direct shares. He should join this forum as he could do with losing some weight

  • I think he could spare a few quid no problem.

    He deffo could do with joining this place lol

  • Going by the score it looks like it was a great game, I didn't get to see it. Good start to the season I think.

  • Yes a good game, couple of good substitute changes for Arsenal and a poor one by Leicester swung it.

  • Leicester sending out a message though I think. They might be in the mix again this season. 3 goals at arsenal isn't bad going.

  • With Vardy they are dangerous ...punting long ball forward good on the break. ARSENAL sloppy at the back. Come on the toon sunday.

  • Without vardy they might not function so well. It will be an interesting season and I hope Leicester have a good go at it.

  • My prediction for the title Man city then Chelsea 3rd Spurs then a surprise team May be Brighton..your manager to get the lip on and walk or get fired.

  • I don't know who to predict for the title this year. Your lot will stay up though I think. You could be right about Brighton and our manager can do one cause I don't like him lol

  • He likes himself though. You could do with another George Best.....come to think of it so could we.

  • A new George Best would be amazing. Not likely to happen though.

    Yes he does like himself and he likes to spend a lot too.

  • Chelsea are getting a right hiding lol glad to see it.

  • Aye....just getting back in....surprise result up to now.

  • Red card for Chelsea though.

  • And another.

  • Good win for your team best team I've seen this weekend....what was Shelvey doing for Newcastle...we're in trouble already

  • Yes a good win indeed for my team.

    What did he do to get sent off?

    Spurs are a top six team, you will win against the lesser teams, I think Newcastle will stay up.

  • Shelley stamped on Deli Alis foot 3 feet from the ref...thick or what

  • Oh well that was stupid, deserved a red card then.

  • Certainly did....

  • Who are you playing next?

  • Bakersfield away sunday

  • Huddersfield

  • Maybe a win for you in that one.

  • Only hope so...just sat back and invited them to come forward even with a full team

  • Wrong way to play in the premiership.

  • Might change my mind and pick your team for title....they haven't finished in the transfer market yet either

  • They did look good today I must say.

    The two Manchester teams are the favourites this season in my opinion.

  • Money talks and they've both got plenty....well time for tomorrow

  • True!

    Have a goodnight mate.

  • And you

  • Oh! My hubbie supports the Magpies!

    He originates from Cramlington!

  • Good on him, he will know what Stottie sandwiches are and Pease pudding with pork and stuffing dips. What made him move, must have been the love of a good woman.

  • Did your husband watch Newcastle today?

  • Hhhhmmmm.... you know how to hurt a person! He was listening to it as we worked in the garden. Didn't go very well did it??? :(

  • Couldn't be more upset than me

  • Yes totally agree. Old habits die hard, trying to eat no more than 3 slices a day. Proper healthy spread instead of butter. If I have mash no butter, more veg less potato, grill not fry, cut out toast and marmalade after cereal. Makes sense when you've had a health scare.

  • It's about 'spending' your calories wisely, just as you would spend the £££ wisely 😊

  • Over the course of my weight loss - I have moved back to butter (in small quantities, usually just for cooking) and away from these healthy spreads - as sadly most of them are not that healthy! I also use cream, creme fraiche, full fat cottage cheese. None of these in HUGE quantities. I'd rather have a small amount of something that taste nicer (in my opinion....) than a larger amount of lower fat / lower calorie equivalent.

    They say that butter isn't as bad for your health as the bread that many people spread it on!

    I think I may have said that I eat bread very rarely now. As I can only eat 1100 calories a day to continue my weight loss, it seems a bit of a waste to use 120 calories for one slice of bread!

  • I hope you are encouraged by the fact that I have no calcification, despite both my parents had heart problems. The cause is things that stimulate abnormally high levels of insulin and insulin-like growth factor (IGF-1).

  • You found the good place to start :)

    Here are a lot of good people who are changing their lifestyle for healthier. Check out Daily Diaries for some meal ideas ;) Check oit also NHS 12 week plan. I know it is weight loss, and I am not sure if you're overweight, but it will help you develop good eating habits.

    If you have problems with stroke, you should concentrate on changing "bad" fats for healthy ones. So increase amount of fish, sea food, avocados, olives, olive oil, coconut oil in your weekly menu.

    You can do it! Just one small step after another ;) Good luck!

  • Looks like you are doing all the right things like walking playing golf you have to sort what are eating you have to take control just one day at a time .i no it's hard

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