I'm having a small but perhaps significant battle with a strong desire to sink deep into a bottle of wine tonight. During the 12 week plan I successfully banned myself from having wine in the house, and have now reached the point where I keep myself happy with a half pint (or two) of cider every now and then, and only have wine at special events. But today a combination of low energy after a testing couple of days, low mood from various jobs not coming through etc, and having a fairly unplanned solitary sort of day, is steering me back towards the bottle. But why? I really don't think I'm an alcoholic, having known some alcoholics in my time. I also know I shouldn't drink so much, partly for health reasons, partly for weight control reasons, and have succeeded in developing good habits now. Are these habits just not fully bedded in yet? Is there a lesser but still significant level of alcohol dependence that some people get, without being full blown alcoholics? Now I've posted this I'm going to really try to be accountable and not succumb tonight. But I'm so frustrated after all these weeks and months to be getting the same bottle glugging desire still! And also I really don't want to sink back into old habits and risk regaining the weight.
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