A new symptom?? Life isn't boring, that's for sure!! My new resolution was to laugh at everything instead of responding with anger. Well, here goes nothing! I was ANGRY!! But then I remembered!! Having a nice convo with daughter on cell phone, with morning coffee (well, that's "my morning" at 6:30 pm cause pain had kept me awake all night which meant sleep all day), coffee 3/4 gone, lukewarm (important to story). She said bye (arrived at work as RT at Univ of Tol H), laid phone down, picked up coffee cup, and WHAMO!! An MS moment! Have you ever had your foot battle with the air for a place to put it down on the floor? Who is going to win - the air or the foot? If the air wins, you fall!!! If the foot wins, you remain upright!! Well, never had that happen with my right hand. It had a battle with the coffee cup. I wanted my fingers to grasp the handle of the cup. My fingers wanted to play with the air making sign language to its shadowy friend, and refused to grasp the handle. As happens with the crowd in this group, our communication brain nerves are not a winning bunch of heroes; specifically, they are the underdogs, a bunch of loses who have lost their myelin clothing running around naked. So, the coffee cup goes splat***###%%%^^^ on my nice red Christmas tablecloth I have been negligent in removing and packing away til December. STOP! LOOK! WHAT!! As usual, my reaction time is zero! I look at coffee on my clothes, coffee on tablecloth, coffee on paperwork I was reading, coffee on oatmeal bars I was eating - and coffee on my coffee colored phone. What do I do? Mmmm......what is important here? My autonomic nervous system never kicks in (especially if I burn myself!) - I just stare for about a million nanoseconds! Did I say my pink phone is now brown? Brown phone. Mmm......BROWN PHONE!!!!! NOT RIGHT!!! Grab phone and rub off on pajama top quickly, dry quickly, rice needed? soaked? does it work? make a phone call? panic? scream? anger? is this gonna be a daily happening? can I not hold a coffee cup anymore????? NO - don't take that pleasure away from me, too!!! I'm not ready yet!!!
Phone works, pajama top covered in coffee stains, along with red tablecloth. Papers were just junk mail I was going through, and I will fix another cup of coffee and USE BOTH HANDS! First rule, find another way to do what I want to do, or gracefull enjoy the memories of what I once did. I may not backpack again, but I am enjoying my second cup of coffee, holding it with two hands!!! Ya'll have a creative day, you hear now? God bless each and every one, because He will!!
Written by
agapepilgrim
To view profiles and participate in discussions please or .
I sympthsize agapepilgrim ! I don't have MS related problems with my hands but due to weaknesses in my hand strength and tendinitis in my wrists and thumbs, I have to be vigilant not to drop things. And it still happens a lot! I have spilled more cups of coffee than I can count when my grip failed me. I can't blame this one on M.S. it's more likely 35+ years working with computers.
Oh agapepilgrim. You have done it again. Why don't you channel your energises into writing a book, I could read what you write for ever. Again you have made me laugh, so I thank you, but I am sorry about the coffee incident. I have got used to dropping stuff with my right hand. Only yesterday I broke my sons favourite pint water glass, which reminds me I have to tell him yet. My dinner services are not sets of 6 or 12 anymore, I have 5 of one, 3 of one and 11 of another but life goes on. When there are 12 of us for dinner I always have the odd plate, as long as it is filled with good, what does it matter if it doesn't match everyone else's. I have learnt to eat with my left hand, carry but I do struggle with learning to write with my left. Anyway pass it off as experience and move on. You might never do it again, and if you do it's a lesson learnt. May God bless you too, I love the picture, blessings always Jimeka
jimeka I believe in decorating that style is called "eclectic."! I definitely decided to go with it after dropping and breaking so many dishes. I do try to make it a balanced of odd dishes - you know, I gotta have 4 of one design, 2 of another design, no odd numbers for me (OCD getting worse!). Odd numbers are my OCD bane! What I don't break, I lose! After my last "guest dinner" I discovered I did not have enough silverware for 8 place settings! Does dishwashers eat silverware? Oh, I forgot. Our dishwasher started leaking after my daughter and her 2 sons moved out; my husband decided not to replace it and promised to be our dishwasher! He replaced the area with shelves for my foreman grill, pancake griddle, turbo skillet, and my pampered chef pieces, which was fine with me. And, he keeps his promise every morning at 6 am, while I sleep! That would be tough, writing with my left hand, but thinking about that, I do very little hand writing any more. So much is on my laptop or phone. My right hand does begin to hurt on someday and I must tell whoever, "time's up, right arm muscles #7 pain, must quit!." My niece will say, silly, use your voice to activate email. And I say, silly, my voice is so garbled my phone prints unintellige words!! Siri never understands what I say!!!!" (As usual, they just don't "get it."!) You know what???? My husband comes home tonight, brings his phone to the kitchen, says, listen to this voicemail you left me and see if YOU can understand what YOU are saying??" He plays the voicemail. Garbled gook. I sheepishly recover quickly, of course, I can't understand it! That's why I text you later and wrote, call me"!! (as I silently lmho) I was too tired at the time to leave an understandable message and realized it but didn't tell him. Was I mean??? Nah, just sick and tired of MS!!!!!!!! He thinks he has it bad trying to understand me? I have to LIVE with myself!!
jimeka thanks for the compliment of picture. a friend took us out to eat for birthday celebrations in November. I turned 70, and my husband 80! I have often wanted to write a book. Since I was 17, it was going to be about my totally, unbelievable, devastatingly humorous, deadly to the heart and soul but survived by humor birth family (which is continuing into the third generation and could make a tv series never ending!), but, yea, this MS thing would be a lot more fun!!! A close friend of mine said once I was verbose, and in Creative Writing in college, my professor wrote on all my papers K.I.S.S. - keep it simple, stupid!
@Jesmcd2 what fork??? I went back and read evertything I posted and can't find mention of a fork.. so what fork and I overlooking (only my daughter and I know that's the nickname for my husband so I know you have not hacked my texts!!!), so what are you referring to - or for you English majors - to what are you referring? (never end a sentence with a preposition said the English professor!). I can always make up a story what happened to the fork if you start me with the story I forgot!!
Omg l think l was having a flash back to a childhood terror, when l lost a fork and mom screaming at me😅😅😅 when l saw silverware all l saw was fork. Ugh! Omg 😅😅😅
Talk about flashback whoa... Someone bring me back🌠
Ladies, I have moved to nice decorative plastic dinnerware. I came across some pretty ones at Home Goods and Pier One. I had broken so many of Ky plates I just conceded. I have not gotten similar coffee cups but now agapepilgrim I think I better do it preemptively.
Karen-x My brother visited and said I have too many coffee cups (collected from too many places so I don't mind breaking a few), but they are all heavy mugs so I doubt they will break, but I did manage to break my very favorite 10" pyrex casserole dish which I cannot find a replacement for in any thrift store anywhere!!!
Oh pooh. I broke my stone 13x9 pan. And a few other things gs, baking wise. With my other cog issues I try not to cook much unless someone is home to watch me. Lol.
There is a warranty...but I just won't deal with those home sales anymore. I had a pampered chef representative steal everyone's money at my party....company was good. They gave everyone what they ordered but I just don't want to deal...I have cheap glass 13x9 anyway.
Believe it or not ladies, Agapepilgrim, Karen-X, erash, Angelite, and Jessmnd2 my sister-in-law counts her silverware after everything is cleaned up, before she puts dishes away when she has parties. That way if she's missing pieces she can go through her garbage and find them! I have not resorted to that yet. Of course I buy the cheap silverware so i can afford to replace it when I need to with other, new cheap silverware.
You know you were supposed to bring me back not send me back Fancy1959 😥😅😥 ugh is all l can say. If l had my way, we would use plastic forks and spoons. 😁
But l do use paper plates every chance l get! I love my boyfriend's cooking! I just don't love the mess😕 So less dishes to wash is always a good thing! AND I don't have to worry about breaking them😅
Oh my gosh Jessmcd2,. Aspen HASfit on their wedding dishes that I packed away when we moved into our new house. He wants to get them out bring them to the kitchen and use them. They're very fine Noritake China with the gold trim around the edge. I believe we've used them twice in her entire married life. Complete set for 12 - 1 cup and saucer maybe an iced tea glass and maybe one dessert plate and regular plate.. I don't want to attempt to use them. I know if you tap them on anything you're going to break them. So all I'll do is break them like you would crack eggs in a skillet. Thanks for going to be able to put them in the dishwasher to clean. I kept explaining but he won't listen that you can't put the gold edged China especially Fine China in the dishwasher. You're going to ruin them within 1 or 2 washings. I had planned on selling them to get Maybe $150 to $200 out of them. He is adamant about refusing to give them as well as it called it but I believe he's stupid not to Take the Money and Run instead of ruining them and getting absolutely nothing out of him but messing up the entire set. Sister-in-law, the one who counts for silverware Alma has Christmas every year and uses her fine china. Pre MS I would be on the crew of three or four ladies who would spend 1 to 2 hours after supper was over
Has he said why he is so determined to use them? Seems kind of Strange.😅Men are weird sometimes.😕 Just divert his attention 😅 Sounds like he has a pretty good reason tho, even if he is the only one that knows what it is.
I know there are some traditions that my bf and l had to get used to. Both of us was Christmas Eve, but l won that one.😁😅 So he got Christmas day😁 and l suck it up and eat icky food 😕😑😅
Fancy1959 and all others who have fine china packed away: I am 70, my husband is 80. I, too, have the 12 place setting that I gave my daughter years ago when my husband retired and we took off traveling in a motor home full time. After his stroke, and my "everything", we sold out traveling home and bought the farm home in Ky. By then, daughter had divorced the abusive husband, got college degree as Respriratory Therapist and supported 2 teenage sons, living in apt. Guess where chine is??? In a Rubbermaid container, along with others containg leggos, transformers, Thomas the train stuff, off season clothes, etc.,etc, in her storage bedroom!!!!! GRRRR!!! So, what did agape decide to do??? Since she is 43, and as JIm Nabors sang, Sunrise, Sunset, slowly days go by!! I dug out MY good china, 2 place settings at a time, and USE THEM!!!! AS I break them, I will dig out 2 more place settings and USE THEM, even all the serving dishes and absolute intricate piece of art tea pitcher!!!! What is the value of $200???? 5 nice meals at a really nice restaurant? I just paid my electric bill of $244!!!! Where is the logic here???? Enjoy that china, Fancy!!! Make a common meal of meat loaf FANCY with your beautiful china!!! Brink it out every Sunday because Sundays are special!!!! I don't use my china every day; I do use it only on special occasions because it is special!! But, I did have an epiphany one day along with that "dance as though no one is watching (because I will fall down), sing as no one is listening (because I will need water), and laugh when I break something because i did have something to enjoy for awhile and that's more than a lot of people have!!! (Ok, I will shut up now about unpacking and using china. MS has definitely changed my view on enjoying each moment while I can.)
I didn't know whether to laugh or cry agapepilgrim so l laughed! 😁 The way you had me involved in your story was amazing! I was right there rooting for you, and cheering when you won the battle!! You go girlfriend!✊😊 You should definitely write more!
I love your way of telling a story! I constantly (and unpredictably) lose control of my R hand. I have dropped so many things! I'm getting better at remembering to use my L hand when I need a reliable, working appendage. Keep laughing - it makes life so much less stressful.
Thanks so much, agapepilgrim -- you articulated the experience with vivid imagery, and a very touching sense of humor. I really enjoyed reading your post.
I, too, am losing right hand function and dexterity. I thank God daily that I am left-handed, and yet, reading your post (and the very thoughtful reply by jimeka ) gives me a powerful reminder of just how thankful I can and should be.
Here's praying that each of us has a dry and scald-free afternoon
I feel your frustration!!! Sometimes I think, maybe I've always been this clumsy?.... Then I retort to myself, No, no you haven't. This everyday game of fumble is growing tiresome. I wonder how much longer I'll be able to maneuver my eyeliner pencil to put my face on....as it is, I fumble to pick it up...along w/ my mascara, lipstick, eye shadow applicator, Q-tips....even silver ware to eat. Once I've got it, I've got it. It's GETTING it that first time that gets me....And that extends to over reaching for my glass of water, or no opening my fingers to grasp it and instead I punch it to the floor. These fine motor skills are slowly disappearing........At least we are all going through it together I hope your sleep comes easier and you get more rest
cassielynn71 I have given up sleeping at night and sleep during the day to see how that works. So far I am missing time with my husband! But getting 8 hours sleep during the day!
Oh, I could so relate to your coffee experierience. I buried two mugs last week! Finally my husband brought me an iced coffee (he left work to do it), God bless him, I really wanted that coffee. Two mugs in thirty minutes! It was enough to make me batty. But I loved your story, your beautiful picture. We will keep on working through these things together and laugh as possible. Kelly xx
Erash, it's funny that you wrote to me, as I was going to track you down and share something with you. I got an email from amazon, where I purchased my trike, and they have very nice adult trike covers for $20. I didn't know if you knew that, but thought you might want to know. I am doing okay, thanks for asking. In fact, two days ago I was so great, it felt like I did not even have ms! Alas, it was short-lived, but oh so sweet. What about you? Are your symptoms behaving themselves? How is your volunteer work? I hope you are enjoying it. It's really wonderful, jacqui I think her name here is Bygonelines, and I live about 3 miles apart and we are developing the most wonderful friendship. She is one of the sweetest, kindest, most fun women I have ever met. I really hit the jackpot with her as a neighbor. Let me know how you are feeling and adjusting to not working, okay? Keeping you in my prayers, Kelly xx
Kelly Amore55 so happy to hear you had a reprieve, even if only short lived. Perhaps it means the sunny days are trying to break through --poor poetic attempt
What is a trike cover? is it for transporting on the back of the car or something?
I have come to count on this site or the people in it as company with my morning coffee each day and I feel like wonderful friendships are developing. So great Jacqui lives that close!
Just heard back that I got a spot in the next birds of prey center volunteer orientation. I will be feeding injured raptors Sunday afternoons. I'm very excited even if it does mean I have to chop up lil critters for their gourmet meals. Hopefully, I will still have 10 fingers when I am done volunteering
Oh, Erash what a great volunteering job! You will get so much satisfaction watching those raptors recover. I guess you just get used to the gory stuff 😝. A trike cover is just what it sounds like, a tarp type thingy in the shape of an adult trike to keep the elements off. We don't have a garage, so I needed something to cover my trike, whenever it gets put together!😂 Hopefully by spring, if not before, but we keep getting dumped with snow so it would do me no good now anyway. You didn't say how you are feeling? Are you okay? Love, Kelly xx
WAshingtongirl I've shared my home with a love bird and a cockatiel but no eagles or owls. New adventures 😊
I'm an animal lover and I was worried if I volunteered for a pet shelter I would have a houseful of paws 🐶🐱
I'm safe. Can't take the raptors home 🙄
Although my husband says that the rescued and then released birds will remember me and come swooping down to say hello when we are walking in the neighborhood 😮
Tutu, don't feel too bad, I too am completely banned from shelters. Although I broke the rule a month ago, found the most darling11month old puppy, took my hubby to see it and he fell head over heels in love with her! Mind you we alreadyhad four dogs, but they are all gettingup in years and this little girl has breathed new life into everyone! But the rule is very firmly back in place.😁I simply adore all animals. How are you feeling,Tutu? I hope and pray you are well. Let's pray everyone has a good, healthyyear. I am concentrating all day, each day only on the most positive thoughts. Wishing you a warm and wonderful day. Let me know how you are doing, always concerned. Love, Kelly xx
Thank you Amore55 . I'm feeling better than I have lately, but I wasn't feeling nearly as bad as you were. Talk about concerned! We are all relieved to 'see' you here again. You were missed.
I'd say your hubby might need to be banned too! Five? My! I bet they keep each other company, though. And yes, your newest puppy has mostly likely perked up the older ones. My grandkids do that to me! (Of course, I'm wiped out for a couple days after they leave.) I'm sure it's the same with our pups.
You take care of yourself and rest, Kelly. Sure hope this latest relapse is on the way out. 💕Dawn
Tutu, I am concerned about Fancy. We usuallywrite everyday,but I haven'theard from her in some time. It seems quiet in her corner.Do you know if she is okay? I don't know if I offended her, I offeredan apology just in case. But mostly I am just sick with worry. I love her so much. Please let me know if she is in the hospital or something awful. Thank you so very much. With love, Kelly xx
Amore55 , I am sure you have done nothing to offend Fancy. I bet she is a bit run down from the holidays and maybe trying to catch a breath before catching up here. I am sure she will answer you in no time!
Amore55, it's fancy 1959 here. I've been battling a bit of weather related issues myself. We've had some extreme coldgear last day or two and my Ms has decided this year that it takes just being out in the cold. Oh Kelly my stamina, especially my legs, have flown straight out the door with this cold streak. Yesterday I mt my husband for supper. He tore his favorite jacket the Friday before and it was really bothering him. I couldn't even hardly see it but being the profession see if it bothered him immensely. I had gone by JCPenney and pick him up a nice jacket but it wasn't a lightweight with that new lightweight down in it. So it didn't suit him. After we ate I was still right next to pennies so I ran the jacket back and returned it. I was probably 200 yards away from a different department store that I love called Elder-Beerman so I ran in there. I found him a wonderful synthetic down jacket on sale with my bonus points are earned for about 40 bucks as I was taking the car and backing up to hang up the different jacket I didn't realize my shoe string was untied and I stepped on it and fell backwards hard. Landing on my bad side but my shoulders torn up. I hit my elbow and it still looks funky and my shoulder was beside himself so I stood once I got home and availed myself to death can you feel somewhat better this morning. Now today I just ran out to return to items and I went back to Elder Beerman first to pick me up a lightweight down comma after all what's fair is fair. Hand I had two more episodes weakness in the legs where I went down unexpectedly butt a little bit more gracefully and carefully. It's this cold weather. I'm feeling very frustrated and sore right side is mad at me my ribs are mad at me and my right knee is the site itself from going down twice today. I need to learn to stay in when it's extremely bitterly cold. It seems that's just as bad as the heat for me this season. Thanks for your concern and it seems I have to be extremely careful with the cold this season too. So unless someone text me I guess I have to stay home right now. And I will really need to stay shopping only in stores that have a little electric scooters in them. If there's no small electric shopping cart that you can motor around by yourself then I need not to go there right now.😩
Fancy1959 , I am so sorry to hear about your fall! 😱 And all that go-go-go. I hope you aren't even sorer tomorrow or the next day. You are so fortunate you didn't break anything.Take care of yourself. 💕
Fancy, I am so very sorry for your troubles. I have spokento a number of misers here who are very bothered by the cold, as am I. Your falls sound terrible, I wish I could come over and make you dinner!😍 I just knew something was wrong, it has been too quiet in your corner,and I missedyou dearly. I hope you know how much I love you and appreciate your friendship. Be safe, Fancy. I will write again either tonightor tomorrow. Love, Kelly xx
Oh Fancy1959 so sorry to hear all this. Shoe laces need to behave! I have that issue. Hubby says why don't you double knot...then I can't get the knots out. Hope u r feeling better. Sending u 💐
Fancy, how are you feeling today? I am praying for you morning, noon and night. I hope you are not in pain. Again I wish we lived closer so I could do something for you!😃 Let me know how you are feeling,okay? With much love, Kelly xx
Fancy1959 I use those electric carts all the time. so sorry about your falls. I have not been out of the house since Monday. Been hibernating like a bear under the covers in bed, staying safe. sounds like it was a wise decision. Cold = pain and fatigue. Looking forward to warmer weather this week so I can reschedule to medical appts.
I take all three boys overnight (hubby is here to help), but I'm wiped out for days afterward. They've asked to stay 3 nights (their mom and dad would love that too 😉). It's so hard to say 'No,' but I just can't do it. So yes, I totally understand.
The boys are 4, 6 and 9. I know you have 2 grandkids, right? Boys or girls? And how old are they? It sounds like your girls and grandkids live nearby. My grandsons are an hour away. Our three granddaughters live in other states. 😔
@tutu l have a grandson and granddaughter both 7 now💕 And they live about 2yrs away. I shooed them out of this town as soon as they were able. 😞 No jobs here and if your lucky to get a good one, there's no advancement for them. So l see them a few times a yr💕
I assume they aren't twins. And 2 hours away isn't too bad, Jesmcd2 .
With our grandsons being closer, I feel like I MUST offer to take them more often. I remember how much I would have loved a break when my boys were little. We never had family living nearby. But that's where I get into trouble. You love them so much and at this age (like yours are too), they think you hung the stars up in the sky! You just love being with them. Just wish I didn't overdo it and that having them over and spendingthe night didn't wipe me out so much.
Oh Lord!! TEENS!! And girls at that WAshingtongirl God Please Help Their Parents.!. The 6yr old is still adorable 😅😅 😑 Teen girls are scary 😑
No they aren't twins but close enough to be siblings 💕 Bubbies will be 8 in Jun and Lilli Bug just turned 7😊
I completely understand not having help. And trying to make up for it. Just a few yrs back l used to take them for a wk at a time. 😢 Both of them! I even bought them a "playground" swingset to pay on. OK enough of that l will cry!
Naw.. l used to foster dogs for them WAshingtongirl ,. Except there less and mine were quite different. After receiving the 2nd dog with no food or help in sight again, l wrote a very formal letter to her, and then proceeded to go up the chain. They don't like me much. *Shrug*
😬 Sounds like you did the right thing for the dogs Jesmcd2 . I fostered a greyhound that had been taken away from a family. Poor Bob. He looked like he'd been starved. He obviously had been neglected too. First thing he did when he walked into my home was lift his leg on the entry wall. 😱 It went downhill from there. But our greyhound rescue group was great. Just a shame how some pet owners are.
Wish I could say I've been back, by Thursday, weather here changed drastically. Freezing at night, raining during day. Between MS and OA, I spent days in bed staying warm. Finally have a nice day today, but doubt if I will venture out. Will try again soon.. Thank you for asking.
Not the best start to your day, Agape pilgrim ! I favour the wobble your drink away with spinal tremor method, myself lol ! I have noticed that my right hand does not always obey - if trying to grasp my purse from my bag or paperwork it sometimes just flails pointlessly about in the air before letting me grasp what I want. Putting keys in locks or a screwdriver in a screw head is fun ! I often use my left hand for drinking now, as right arm gets weak with the weight and lifting action. Glad you've found a safe solution : ) x
Agapepilgrim, it's Fancy1959 I absolutely loved your post. I have fought weakness in my hands for a couple of years now. But it seems to have gotten worse over the past two or three months. It is frustrating to pick up a piece of paper walk to the register with a coupon or try to file the paperwork at home and you get where you're going and look down and the paper's gone and you didn't know it!.😞
My motto has always been it's better to laugh at yourself then cry at yourself so I try to laugh it off when I do it. So I applaud or similar attitude. Besides if we cried at every curve MS throws at us, we would wind up with eyes so puffy and our cheeks so red you would look like we had permanent pink eye. Haha! But I do wind up with mysterious stains that I never knew I where i got them. They are on my pajamas, on my jeans, tops, and on my jackets. They're everywhere. How about you do you happen to find the mystery stains? One of the things I've started using it has helped a lot is to use straws where I can. I guess it'd be great with ice coffee but I'm not so sure how hot coffee would do with them. I have never gotten used to drinking coffee. I have always loved the smell of coffee but can't get passed its bitterness when I drink it.
I do so love your senseof humor. Please try to never lose it or misplace it. It would be a real loss for the chat room if it disappeared. Anytime I see your post up I know it will be pertinent, it will be fun, and I will love reading it. Thank you so much for continuing to be a major influence on the chat room. You keep your attitude positive, upbeat, and downright fun to get involved with. Fancy.
Hello! I can really relate to your post regarding the "mis-grabbing" of your right hand. I am a violinist....been playing since I was six. I am also an orchestra teacher. Last March, I started dropping my bow. I had been optimistic about my diagnosis and symptoms up until THAT happened. Playing that instrument and being a music teacher, which requires right-hand conducting, have been a huge part of my identity for so long. That's when depression really started to hit home. Thankfully, my neurologist understood how this pesky problem could turn into a career-ender. I received five, plasma transfusions, and began OT immediately. Thankfully, I was able to return to professional playing in the early summer. When I am teaching with my instrument, I have to be very careful not to do too many things at once, because it is when I am attempting to multitask that I drop things or make mistakes. Being a woman, mother and musician requires constant multitasking. Sometimes, I just need to give myself a break and remember to only do one thing at a time instead of my pre-MS five.
Content on HealthUnlocked does not replace the relationship between you and doctors or other healthcare professionals nor the advice you receive from them.
Never delay seeking advice or dialling emergency services because of something that you have read on HealthUnlocked.
I hope your sleep comes easier and you get more rest 
I'm Baaaaack!
