A little advice and question

[Pikedale221]

So my family girlfriend and I have done some research and we're pretty sure I have mild OCD... My main theme is hocd it's my second time going thru this as an adult... After the first episode when I was 23 when it went away... I was exactly the same as before the episode my true self... It's kinda weird how everyone around me knows I'll be exactly the same as before and I can't see it at time... Weird how your head can mess with you like that right... My question is can the counselor or physiatrist tell you you'll be yourself again?

[FirstResponder23]

hello,

Welcome to the forms. I’m sorry to hear your struggles. I know from personal experience that seeing a therapist will at least be able to help you understand if you’re dealing with OCD. And if so, therapy is something that can be extremely beneficial, especially with someone who specializes with OCD. In therapy you’ll learn not only a lot about it, but also a lot of strategies to help reduce the noise it makes and be more comfortable with the uncertainty that OCD throws out there.

[Pikedale221 in reply to FirstResponder23]

My question is logically I know I've always been into women... So when you say uncertainty with OCD do you mean they kinda show you that it's you're head playing tricks on you?

[FirstResponder23 in reply to Pikedale221]

In therapy they inform you how ocd works and show you many other people have very similar thoughts and fears. Therapy has helped me understand ocd and to identify what thoughts are ocd driven and where ocd likes to attack.

[IStillHaveHope]

OCD tends to wax and wain over time. I've had years where I was "fine" and then inexplicably crash into OCD hell. It sounds like maybe you're going through the same thing.

As for you're question, you'll be growing so you won't "be yourself" again. You'll be better and greater than before. The point of OCD therapy is not to never have an OCD thought. It's to learn how to have the OCD thoughts and allow them to be there; not to try and force them away. In my opinion, this is better since it makes us stronger.

Part of my journey was accepting that I had OCD and incorporating it as part of my being. I spent a long time trying to run away and avoid it since it was so distressing. This really didn't help in the long run as I had no skills to deal with it when it was bad. I wasted a lot of years doing this. Therapy was very difficult and took a lot of work, but in the end it has been so worth it.

Sorry if I rambled a bit. I hope this helps.

[Pikedale221 in reply to IStillHaveHope]

I guess what I mean by exactly the same the thoughts completely went away... My sex drive came back and I felt like myself again until me and my girl had an argument and a few days later the thoughts... Logically I understand it happens with stress in my relationship.... And with the research they've done that's i guess called a cycle... So they'll pretty much completely go away again till something triggers me again like last time?

[deValentin in reply to Pikedale221]

When you recover from OCD, it's still possible to have OCD spikes once in a while, especially in times of stress or boredom, but, overall, unwanted intrusive thoughts, images or urges don't bother you with the same intensity as before. A stable recovery doesn't depend too much on external circumstances and triggers.

[Pikedale221]

I guess then last time... When I was 23 my family and girlfriend got me out of it I went on ssris for like a month didn't really like them it took like 6 months and everything slowly got back to my normal... So it's completely normal with OCD for the intrusive thoughts go away for years? I've never really had other themes as an adult.. I did something stupid with a bunch of reddit research and it seems like everyone has intrusive thoughts constantly

[deValentin in reply to Pikedale221]

OCD is a bit like a substance use disorder. You could be sober for years, and then, while you're in a vulnerable state of mind, a trigger could push to return to your old ways and start a binge episode that could last for a while. Likewise you could be OCD-free for a long time, and then, a trigger combined with a predisposing mood could push to dwell on some intrusive thoughts and fall into a downward OCD spiral. However, if you know some tools that you used before and are effective to stop an OCD episode in its tracks, you can be reasonably confident that you'll stay in control of your actions.

Everybody has, from time to time, intrusive thoughts that don't reflect their real values. However, most people don't give them any meaning and keep going about their business as usual. If you do that, they go away on their own. Trying to suppress them directly or ponder over their meaning makes them sticky.

[Pikedale221 in reply to deValentin]

Is it okay that right now I'm scared I'll never be myself again and sometimes it gets so twisty that I have thoughts of not wanting to be myself again.. everything I've read about OCD says it can switch and twist and at the end of the day it's all you're head messing with... Some of the people I've talked to said when something like this sometimes it's best to trust the people that know you not what you're heads telling you

[deValentin in reply to Pikedale221]

You're right. When you're confused, it's best to ask people who have your best interest at heart to help you clarify things. The human mind does self-regulate when given the proper conditions, but it's sometimes difficult to believe it when going through an emotional crisis. Other people see ourselves from a different perspective and can help us get out of the tunnel vision you may fall into.

[Pikedale221 in reply to deValentin]

Idk if you've ever went through hocd but it's weird how it can twist things I'm sure it's like that with other themes where you get scared then happy and just weird thoughts I can't wait to be myself again

[deValentin in reply to Pikedale221]

No, I've never gone through hocd myself. However, the content of the thoughts themselves is not the main issue in OCD. Instead, how a person responds to the thoughts is what matters.

[Pikedale221]

It's kinda funny how everyone around you knows you better then what's going on in you're head at the moment