Taking too long to wash my hands and take a shower

[PLandes]

I’ve been working with my therapist and have made quite a bit of progress in overcoming my OCD, but I’m still having trouble with taking a long time to wash my hands and take a shower. I just feel like I have to wash one part of hands a certain amount of times before I feel like I can move to the next part and the same with in the shower. It feels like I’m never going to get finished. It’s excruciating and so frustrating. Really affecting the quality of my life. Can anyone relate or had success in overcoming these type of OCD issues?

[LuvSun]

I can definitely relate to you. It’s always been a problem for me. Just try reading and learning as much as you can about OCD. That and this forum has helped me get by tremendously.

[PLandes in reply to LuvSun]

Have you had the same problem of washing every section of your body a certain amount of times, before moving on to the next part until you’re finally done like an hour later. I’m making some progress in other aspects of my OCD by working with my therapist, working on the workbooks that he’s given me and reading books, but he and I can’t find a solution to this particular problem. I’m trying to find a therapist who has experience with helping a patient with this same problem. That’s the reason I wanted to join a support group is hoping I could find someone who has experience with this same OCD problem and could tell me what they did to resolve it. I try to apply what I’ve learned so far, but it’s just not working.

[LuvSun in reply to PLandes]

I find that I have a ritualized way of showering and feel I have to do it a certain way in order to feel clean. It’s definitely a compulsion and I’ve read that by switching up your routine ( i.e. washing certain body parts in a different order) is a way of practicing ERP. I myself am not good at practicing this unfortunately. At one point I had to have my husband show me how to shower in a “ normal “ way. It helped for a while but I find myself going back to my old ways😞

[PLandes in reply to LuvSun]

Well, I really appreciate your reply and the info. It makes me feel better that I’m not the only one who’s having such a hard time with this. It sounds like this is a pretty hard aspect of OCD to tackle. It’s so crazy, right now I want so bad and almost think I can, just to take a normal shower in the morning, but once I get in there and start washing, it starts activating the obsessions and compulsions. I read on the International OCD Foundation website about facing your fears and practicing the CBT/ERP and it’s kind of changed my thinking a little bit. I’ve always been a glass half full type of a guy, so I’m hopeful I’m still going to find a solution. When I start making some progress, I’ll let you know what has helped.

[avid_dog_lover in reply to PLandes]

omg I relate to this so much. I'm new to this forum, but a lot of what I've read here so far is incredibly and astonishingly relatable. I take about 1 hour minimum, 1.5 hours usually, and 2+hours on a bad day to take a head wash, which I do every Saturday. I try to justify it by saying that it takes so long since I detangle my hair in the shower, but the truth is that my OCD obsessive thoughts and compulsions are so time consuming and make me take even longer to do that along with taking a bath. A lot of times I feel that I can't move on to detangling another part of my hair until I finish thinking of a specific thought, and other times, I too feel like I have to wash a certain body part a certain number of times. It is sooooo frustrating and annoying that I take so long to just take a bath, and it eats up so much of my day. What's worse is that I feel so guilty if I think that I'm wasting water or electricity by taking so long to take a bath, since I care a lot about the environment. I also feel bad that sometimes, since I take so long to take a head bath on Saturdays and I usually do it before lunch, I miss out on eating lunch with my family, and whenever my parents scold me about it I feel so bad and I regret taking so long and what's worse is that they ask me what does OCD have to do with taking a bath and idk how to explain it to them and when I try it usually fails or makes them rlly concerned and I don't wanna do that to them and then thoughts come into my head telling me that if I really loved my family I would have gotten over my OCD thoughts to take a fast bath and spend time with them and it makes me feel so guilty and upset and sad. I sometimes feel like I forgot how to take a bath and I have actually coincidentally had the thought of asking someone to show me how to take a normal bath but obviously I can't do that. Anyway, I hope that you're able to tackle this problem, and if you find a good way to do so, please do share it with us! I really do agree that this forum could potentially help people a lot, so I'm gna try to keep using it! Now, off to go take a bath 😔 (sorry I just realised how long this reply is mbmb 🙏)

[Smilespurple502590 in reply to LuvSun]

I deal with OCD . I don't have that problem. I have checking OCD . I have good and bad days with it. It's the OCD that sends doubts. Good Luck.

[LuvSun]

Sorry I couldn’t offer more advice but please let me know of your progress and / or any insights you learn about. I’ll do the same.

[deValentin]

I understand your predicament even if my OCD theme was different. It seems you have trouble, when washing one part of your body, with moving to the next part at a reasonable pace. You may wait to get the 'just right' feeling before moving to the next part of your body and you won't rest scrubbing the same part until you get it.

I had the same experience when doing some research for a project. Sometimes I got stuck on a point that wasn't quite clear and I couldn't do anything else until I clarify it even if it wasn't essential for a reasonably satisfying completion of the project. I wasn't moving towards the completion of the project at a reasonable pace. So the pressure to speed up was extreme because I knew the reasons for my slow pace were questionable. I deflected that pressure by telling myself, "Let me just clarify that point, and then I'll return to normal speed". It then became more important to clarify that point as I perceived it as the only way to return to normal functioning. I was caught in a loop. In the end, even if I was able to clarify the first point, sooner or later I would encounter a second point that would grab my attention in an equally obsessional manner.

It was distressing because I found myself in a situation where I was damned if I gave in to my compulsions and damned if I never because I didn't know how else to appease my mind.

The solution I found was to distance myself somewhat from my confused emotions, and determine what was important and what was less important. Once I focused on what was essential I started to make timely progress towards my goals. It was a boost for my morale and I was able to tolerate the discomfort triggered by a lack of absolute clarity. That discomfort eventually faded over time. However, I know that's something I'll need to watch out for all my life, and I'm okay with that.

Likewise, you need to set reasonable goals in your hygiene practices. By focusing on those goals, it'll be easier to tolerate the discomfort caused by moving your washing from one part of your body to the next at a reasonable pace. Success is good for morale, and good spirits foster decisiveness.