Reassurance

[Dempsey1919]

Hi all, just a tip I found helpful to me. You see we all spend to much time researching ocd. If you keep looking into things which is a compulsion,your feeding your ocd making it worse. We all know what to do but we are checking if something is OK to relieve ourselves of anxiety which is a temporary relief and then you think of another worry to beat yourself up, feel guilty about looking and searching online for reassurance. Reassurance seaking is a compulsion and everything you do it,you make your ocd worse. Try to slowly stop looking for reassurance from Internet and from people in general. It will be uncomfortable at first bit trust me once you start validating and reassuring yourself or even notice your obsession and don't give in to ruminating, confession or what ever compulsion you do,you will feel anxious but your ocd will start losing its power. Do not purposely go out of your way researching ocd all the time. Get a hobby,meditate ,learn a language there are ways to stop thinking of ocd. You can't stop if your on here every day. Life's to short to research ocd. Go to therapy, or you all know what to do, small steps confronting your fears and not doing your compulsions. Set a time a day, I do mine on evening, half hour normally. It starts losing its power. And stop asking on here for reassurance as that's a sneaky compulsion. Your feeding it bigger everything you do a compulsion. Keep busy, like a hobby that you can handle. I find learning Spanish good, as when I feel the urge to repeat rituals in my head I listen to audio Spanish book. It stops me ruminating and shrinking ocd. And once I don't look for reassurance and let it go, my ocd calms. Try it.

[AlfiePoppy]

I agree it’s hard to do at the start but worth it in the long term ,you find you have to suffer the fear of not actually knowing but once you say to yourself I’ve been over this thousands of times, I have driven myself mad, have doubted myself constantly - Why ? Why do I always look at the ‘bad’ side of myself why don’t I start actually looking at who I really am ‘ a nice person ‘ that’s what others see but I don’t see it or allow myself to see it as I’m so consumed with all the opposite thoughts , convincing myself I’m as bad as I think I am so I have decided at nearly 50 having had this ocd since I was 12 to start living my life ! I still have bouts of immense fear but nothing as bad as I used to have they are fleeting or try niggle at me for a few days but eventually pass I have to tell it ‘ I’m not putting up with you or to **** off!’ I’m not on medication I probably should be but have managed with years of therapy and about two years ago my therapist retired I felt I couldn’t start this journey over with someone else - everything has been said so I have left it there and now I have taken up a new course which is great and keeps my mind active in the right way ! Learning and enjoying something new . While writing this my partner and I were talking and I mentioned I replying to sometime in an ocd group and he asked you have ocd ?( I’m with him 10 years ) I said I told you that before but he never knew to what extent till I told him and he was shocked and said well next time you have a thought tell me and I said no that’s the worst thing for me I could do as it’s reassuring me I need to sit with it then tell it to go now, you have been dealt with before numerous times and no longer so good bye ! It’s not easy , I’ve had such lonely , sad , overwhelmingly fearful times in my life where I often thought it would be easier to end it but I had to keep going I have a daughter and I have to keep going for her she doesn’t know about my ocd I shield it from everyone , it does and can get better but you have to be willing to get power over it once and for all you will slip I have many many times but each time you get closer to taking control of it , I have posted here three times this is my longest post ever !! So apologies but maybe someone will get solice from it and give it a go x

[Dempsey1919 in reply to AlfiePoppy]

Well done,sounds like your very resilient. I look on the negative alot. I practice meditation and positive thinking to change my thinking. Tome weren't built in a day,it takes time but we still here. Take care.

[JoeS00]

Hey there you are right! Compulsions are what feeds the OCD. IT isn't easy no doubt therapy is needed with a good lifestyle and sometimes meds in severe cases but you got it right there how OCD works. You gotta confront fears and take risks but it gets easier.

[Dempsey1919 in reply to JoeS00]

Yes I'm on meds too, I'm on to many causing weight gain so I just want to go back to sertraline again.