I have had two consecutive good days at work. Work has always been one of my biggest triggers. Everything seems to be going fine. There are no fires to put out, and I am accomplishing all of my goals. I should be happy, but I have a little anxiety.
My main compulsion is checking. I am now looking for things to go wrong and creating issues in my head. I know a lot of these scenarios may never happen. I want to relax and stop myself from ruminating. Does anyone experience anything similar?
Hey I also have checking compulsion it’s not my main one. I have and struggle with Contamination OCD. I tend to rummuniate a lot and get stuck in a cycle with thoughts. I also tend to check things over and over a couple times and repeat things. I always assume the worst and rarely does the worst happen. As far as the ruminating goes my therapist says you just have to let it pass and learn how to deal with the uncertainty because that’s life. I find that distracting myself and staying busy is better than sitting and doing nothing. But to be honest I’m still trying to find the relief from intense ruminating thoughts. I wish you the best just know your not alone.
Thank you for your kind words. I just researched a technique called rumination-focused ERP. You may want to research this technique too. I hope your thoughts lessen.
Hey thanks for researching it. I’m actually seeing a therapist and we are doing ERP therapy and I’m on medication. That is still something we are working on some days and weeks it’s better than others. But still thank you for sharing. I wish I could give you more answers on how to stop the rumination but I’m still in the process of it myself. I wish you the best definitely use this community for guidance and help. It’s been really nice to have a community that understands what we’re all dealing with and going through.
Yes, yes and yes! OCD makes you feel like the shoe is going to drop. And I can definitely relate to the checking, I do that too. I’m 69 and I have had OCD off and on since I’m 15. As for the rumination, I call it “ going down the rabbit hole”. The more you do it the more OCD wins and I know exactly how it feels when it pulls you in. You will never find the answer that satisfies you, so I would advise you to try and resist the pull. It is HARD and it will create anxiety but I agree with your therapist you have to live with uncertainty. The more you do this the easier it will be, but it will take time. As for the checking, it’s a way to make yourself feel safe, but you’re right it’s a compulsion. When I find myself doing that I try and pull myself back to the present moment, sometimes it takes many tries.
Most experts agree that 'what if' questions feed OCD. People with OCD often wonder, what if something bad happens when I stop checking or ruminating at a certain time? Because it's possible that something bad may happen, they can't bring themselves to stop checking or ruminating when it would be reasonable to do so.
They often fail to realize that, as 'what if' questions can affect their behaviors one way, they also can affect their behaviors the other way. For instance, people with OCD could wonder, what if endless checking or ruminating doesn't bring the peace of mind I'm desperately looking for? What if OCD doesn't deliver on its promises? It's not always easy, but, by asking oneself 'what if' questions from the other side, one may gradually become more disposed to make decisions that take into account the whole picture. It's at least my experience.
Thanks for your reply. I've never tried the positive side of 'what if.' I guess OCD makes me see the negative. I'm glad this has worked for you!
You're welcome. I must add, though, that questioning the value of my ruminations or checking with appropriate 'what if' questions is not enough. For instance, if I'm lost in the desert without water, even if I say to myself "what if I never find any source of water?", I may nevertheless feel compelled to look for some, in spite of no visible signs of water around me. The "hoping against hope" survival mechanism kicks in.
It's why, if I ever want to have a chance to regain some freedom from OCD, I must also find other ways to find peace of mind than OCD. For instance, I practice exposure and response prevention (ERP): for the passing of time to wear out irrational impulses, I try, to the best of my abilities, to stop acting on them. I also practice some acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT): for the passing of time NOT to wear out my value-based intentions, I carry them out without unnecessary delay.
I think many of us here know how that feels! Feeling great, and then thinking that feeling great isn't normal, and expecting a seagull to plop on you at any moment.
I think one way of coping is to enjoy the moments - notice things, flowers in somebody's garden, or in your own garden, dogs playing in the park, coffee with friends - anything that floats your boat. Don't ruminate - just enjoy.
I think that the more we can enjoy the little things, the more they add up to contentment. Make sure that you have other things in life than work - hobbies and socializing etc - to keep you busy, but not so busy as to make you tired.
Some people find a sort of meditation in drawing, or learning to draw, whether at a class or on your own. It doesn't matter if you're any good or not - in fact most people can learn to draw competently. It's just about losing yourself in the moment. And it doesn't require expensive equipment or buying a lot of stuff. Just a cheap notepad or scrap paper (it can feel easier to experiment on cheap paper) and a few pencils or crayons.
Thank you for replying. I just very recently discovered a passion for art. I was able to find some very cheap supplies. I need to remember to draw or color more often. This board has been my socializing. I'll remember to post about good days also.
Thank you for your reply. Yes, that it helpful. I am currently working with a specialist. I recently discovered a passion for art. I started coloring and drawing with an online class. I have to focus so hard on making the lines perfect that I forget whatever stress I was dealing with.
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