i feel my ocd ruined a lot for me can i recover?

all my life i was ashemed of having ocd but now i have acepted it and decided to do something major about it. i am not sure where to begin as its so big in my life. my mum had it and i couldnt accepet that i had it as well but now i have accepted it. i havnt got hoarding like my mum but i have false memory ocd where i am convinced i did some terrible thing like sexual acts and murder. i k kknow its not true but sometime i can go out of my house untill i checked all the news of the areas that i was out to see if someone dies there. i think this all started when i joined a stupid cult. i never had this problem before. i had some different type of ocd like passing through doors i would feel something would happen. i manage to get over that. i know i am not an evil sexual predator. that i am sure of but then i fell in love with someone 7 years younger than me in the cult(he was an adult 19 years old) and as everyone called me a pedophyle i started to think this was true. now my mind is clearing i see that it was fucked up of them to call me that as 19 is an adult and i was only 7 years younger than him but people are so dumb and selfich that it triggered something in my head and when i looked in the mirror i saw a monster. i started to imagine i was some sick person who abuse children and creating false memories in my head of things i did. now i stil have a lot of shame even for loving this guy but i 30 i need to move on before it ruins my life. i also had religious ocd but i am completely over this one. hopefully.

the guy has his own problems and is hacking me as well so its making my recovery difficult