Ocd or anxiety

[Yani2302]

when i was younger i was very aggressive to my sister, then when i become older i felt sorry about it, but now my brain saying why you don't do worst, and my mom say to me even if i do it new thoughts, will arrive after this, maybe they will be worst, our maybe you will feel sorry you don't know, your thoughts come and go, one time my parents fight, i hate when they fight, but some in my brain said you want this and when they calm my brain ask them to fight again, my mom said that alot of thoughts come, even when we act on our thoughts they still will come up, i love that my mom more than i do, because she made mistakes and she learn from them, the problem is that when i'm alone i can realize that it's only my thoughts and brain, but when i'm with people my thoughts sometimes are not there, i just get stressed when I'm with someone, because my thoughts say do it, we will shut up and leave you alone, can someone help me how to stop my thoughts, because i feel that i want to act on them, but i know that alot of more thoughts will come up, how to stop thinking about it, it gets really bad, when I'm with my sister more of the time, i'm not aggressive since along time ago, i don't fight any body, i was aggressive in school and i ask my self why i cant control my anger, and i was angry at myself, aggression don't usually calm you it makes you more aggressive and it's not good, my doctor know that even if we act on it, our brains will never shut, they maybe will hunt us years later our in minutes, people change over time, because we will not let our brain controls us

[deValentin]

Maybe if you take a moment to express more clearly your thoughts and separate your sentences, it would be easier to respond to your post. Personally, I understood " can someone help me how to stop my thoughts", but I don't see plainly what thoughts are bothering you. Thoughts to harm your loved ones?

[Yani2302 in reply to deValentin]

Yeah, im like this from April, but i know before that it's a fear and i experience that it's a fear, now i don't even know, because i start questioning my everything, i sometimes I'm okey for like a 1 or 2 days or 1 day and after i wake up i get this thoughts again, without any reason

[deValentin in reply to Yani2302]

Maybe you’re suffering from harm OCD, which is a subtype of OCD. It’s an obsessional fear to hurt yourself or others, but that fear has no basis in reality because “people with harm OCD are not more likely to harm themselves or others than people with other OCD subtypes. However, they may view their intrusive and unwanted thoughts as an indication of a desire to act. This fuels their anxiety and drives them to engage in various compulsions aimed at eliminating this fear.” (Nicholas Farrell, What Is Harm OCD? Signs, Symptoms, and Treatment, October 2023)

Exposure and Response Prevention or ERP therapy offers hope to get better. It involves some personal work because when you start to engage in compulsions to eliminate the fear, you may think you can stop anytime. However, it’s somewhat like an addiction. The more you invest time and energy in compulsions, the least you’re ready and able to stop when it would be reasonable to stop. And the absolute certainty you’ll never hurt anybody is out of reach. So, you’re stuck: you can’t get what you’re obsessionally looking for and you can’t stop looking for it. The International OCD foundation offers a lot of educational ressources to help people get unstuck. Check their website.