Hi everyone,
I've been out of work for several weeks following colon surgery. I've got severe OCD involving contaminations, not necessarily dirt or germs but various objects or the majority of people I don't like touching me or my things.
It's especially difficult for me because once something is touched, usually it cannot be cleansed, done is done, so the item has to sometimes be discarded. That's been very upsetting for me if I liked the item or it was sentimental.
My car's one of those things, it's very sentimental to me because it was my first new car, my parents went with me, big event for me in 2018, just finished paying it off in the last two weeks...kept having intrusive thoughts something or someone was going to touch it recently.
The other night one of my coworkers stopped by my house, they left something on the windshield of my car wishing me well. While it's someone I like working with, I don't like people touching me but especially my car, only mechanics because they have to...while it was super nice, it's one of the worst case fears for me.
I panicked cause it's one of my biggest fears, I've spent years being cautious to not park close to others or not tell people which car is mine so they don't touch it.
What's worse is the guilt because they went out of their way to wish me well, to give me something nice, but the torment of touching my car upset me so much, I started crying profusely because of the effort I've put in these past few years to "protect" it from contaminations.
So here's my question, there's lots of pollen here, lots of dust from trees getting cut down on my street, lots of water spots from yard-sprinklers, lots of streaks from cleaners on my windshield....so I've tried to tell myself, they didn't touch my car, they touched the buildup of things on my windshield.
That's possible right? It's the only thing I've thought of to help me not completely be tormented by OCD thoughts.
Does someone here know science enough to help me get over this? Please, if you know & thanks