I have been struggling with OCD.
OCD makes me doubt what I hear, say, and have the fear that my husband has the wrong information on different topics.
I try to sit with the core fear that my husband has the wrong information, but the process is so difficult.
First, the thought comes with intense anxiety, it feels like the end of the world.
This anxiety with the thought popping up, happens for few days.
Then, eventually the thought fades away in the background.
After this happens, OCD is fixating on a new thought.
The repetitive cycle of different obsessive thoughts does not end.
The victory is doing the therapy, and not allowing OCD to win.
When the doubting thought has arrived, it will eventually go away.
It seems like a big thing has happened, while the obsession is going on, but it is only temporary.
I still struggle with resisting checking compulsions.
I am just afraid to take the risk of making mistakes, and dealing with the feared consequences.
Sometimes I am able to resist checking compulsions, such as putting the detergent in the washer for washing clothes, and not checking. It becomes a victory for me.
Thus, I can keep trying to resist checking, with the hope that since I have done it before, that I can still continue to do it for various things.
I know OCD is horrible but there is hope that the obsessive thoughts will slowly disappear.
Please try to face the fear even though it is difficult. Since that is the only way to beat OCD, and not let it win anymore.
I face these struggles just as any OCD patient has to face them.
Thus, we are in this together.