I'm new here... I feel like i have to prove that I have OCD. Does anyone feel like they have to prove that they have OCD?

[dontletanxietywin]

I feel like I do not have OCD because I don't have the stereotypical kind of OCD and that people do not believe that I have it.

I am 22 years old. When I was 15 years old, one of my teachers told us that the world was an illusion because everything we do is because of our brains. I could not get that thought out of my head. It spiraled into so many others thoughts. "The world isn't real. When we die none of this will have happened, so nothing is real." "The world is fake. We are just controlled by our brains." These thoughts cause me severe anxiety and then my surroundings look "fake" and I don't really know where I am. For years this thought has been in my head. I use to spend hours googling to see if other people agreed with me to prove that I am not crazy. Years ago, on Yahoo answers (picture above) I posted to see if other people had similar thoughts to make myself feel better. I know this is OCD. I have had therapists tell me that it is. But sometimes I feel like I don't have it because I don't wash my hands or check things over and over again. I feel like i have to prove to others that I have it. I don't know why I am always asking strangers online for reassurance. Is this OCD?

Does anyone have similar thoughts?

[HannahMae]

Hi there, I just wanted to share this because I think it might be helpful. OCD runs strongly in our family and my mom told me that when she younger she went through a phase were she felt like she wasn't here or not present. It's kinda hard to explain it but they were really strong powerful thoughts and feeling and very scary. I'm sure the thoughts and feelings you're describing are really scary to experience and I'm so sorry. I'm working through therapy myself and I have to say it is really, really tough. Does your therapist specialize in OCD? I definitely think that is really important. Overtime with therapy I think this thoughts will begin to unstick. Hang in there okay? You are SO not alone!

[ChristianWolff]

Who can say whether or not the world we perceive as "real" is something else? It is a feeling shared by many, take the popularity of the movie series of "The Matrix". You are not crazy, and again the same question applies: Who can say what is crazy and what is not? Don't worry about it.

[Mothmanfan]

Hi, I recently came across an artucle that sounds a lot like what you’re describing: iocdf.org/expert-opinions/t...

I’m not an expert but the ruminating thoughts sure sounds like OCD, especially having read that article. It’s possible to have OCD without compulsions like checking things or washing hands. It can be purely obsessive thoughts, which it is for me.

[dontletanxietywin in reply to Mothmanfan]

thanks for the article!