Accepted BUT idk ...TIRED

I got accepted into the program for college starting this fall but idk if I should even try right now anymore with all my mental illnesses.

[Boomdiay88]

You definitely should go for it, might be what you need to help your mental health

[Hidden]

What if I don’t make it? Like what if I can’t focus or doubt myself...Or can’t get out the bed or something one day?I’m scared to mess up again. I’ve done this three times before.

Nursing degree-stopped @ clinical’s

Psych degree- stopped with only 3 classes left

Social work degree- 2 yrs left and I stopped

😪😪😪

[Fumble in reply to Hidden]

If it's a subject you like then go for it. It's nice to have some goals to focus on and it will get you talking to people.

We're not the easiest people to work with either, so any extra qualifications make it easier to find new jobs!

If you got that close to finishing Psych could you pick that up and complete it without doing the whole course again?

[Hidden]

Unfortunately unlike the other two degrees the psy degree would’ve been an associates not a bachelors degree

[PNIAuthor60]

I am encouraged that you are still trying and that speaks volumes to me.

I have difficulty processing info myself due to reduced blood flow to the brain but I love learning - and have studied online through venues like Coursera and other neurological studies on line. I've struggled through every class/course but I did my best and for my own interest and no degree or certificate.

Why do you so strongly doubt yourself?

What if you were to change your inner dialogue to confidence in your abilities?

As we liberate ourselves from our own fears and inadequacies, the sky is the limit!! It's hard I will admit, but there is more within you than your mental illness. Dare to believe in yourself!

[Hidden in reply to PNIAuthor60]

Wow. Thank you. You made me smile. I actually felt like I wasn’t a failure for once because you said “I am encouraged that you are still trying and that speaks volumes to me”

I guess I doubt myself because I’ve been told that I’m not smart for so many years. And in school people always divide and I’m left alone. I struggle to gather my thoughts and focus and comprehend sometimes. Although now I know it’s due to borderline personality disorder which can probably stem from mental abuse and bully so that in turn could probably create low self esteem, anxiety, and paranoia.

If I was to change my inner dialogue I would be very fortunate. My perception of myself is something that my therapist is working on. I’m struggling. Some days I have a grip and some days I don’t. Today I felt confident in myself. I danced in my birthday suit in front of the mirror with the lights on to Ciara’s new song called “I Love Myself”. That song does something to me. Normally I hate my reflection ‼️

Okay. I will test the limits. Thank you 🙏🏾

[PNIAuthor60 in reply to Hidden]

Glad to hear that you are blessed to be working with a therapist. You certainly are struggling with a lot but are resilient nonetheless. With your permission, I would like to add you to my prayer list.

I smiled to read of you dancing in front of the mirror - any chance you could give me a link to the lyrics/song as I might be interested in both!

You can't possibly be a failure, you haven't given up!

[Hidden in reply to PNIAuthor60]

Yes, this therapist is VERY PATIENT with me! I’m very grateful for her. Yes you can add me to your prayer list . Some days I feel like I do give up dealing with Suicidal thoughts to say the least on a daily basis isn’t easy.

Sure ! the link to the song is below. I have to search for the lyrics.

itunes.apple.com/us/album/i...

[Hidden in reply to PNIAuthor60]

Here’s a set of lyrics I googled below for the song called “ I Love Myself”

Ciara Lyrics

Play "I Love Myself"

on Apple Music

"I Love Myself"

(feat. Macklemore)

[Ciara:]

The best thing I could ever do for me is love myself

I was sitting on the bed, Atlanta, Georgia

All alone in my emotions, full of fear

Gotta protect this precious life, I got the future by my side

Be the last time that I cry these tears again, hey

No more drama, no more pain

No drama, no drama, no pain

I'm done making same mistakes, ayy

It's alright, I been to the bottom, and I've seen the end

Wanna forever be together 'til the end

And I found the problem, it starts with me

I figured out now what I want, got what I need

(Ladies, help me sing it out now)

Damn right, yeah, I love myself

I'm never gon' fall 'cause I love myself

Damn right, yeah, I love myself

And I can have it all 'cause I love myself

[Macklemore:]

Check it, now

If loving myself's a job, am I doing it?

Art's a weapon, a resistance, am I using it?

I got two girls, how do I get through to them?

Don't want the 'Gram telling my daughters what beauty is, nah

I ain't raising princesses, I'm raising warriors

Self-love is a bite, keep some extra in the holster

My children, I'm trying to teach them to love themselves

But I can't expect it if I haven't accepted myself

See, if Dad isn't sober, and Dad isn't honest

And Dad can't control it, and Dad got these problems

If Dad is so selfish, and Dad is lying to mama

Then that is gonna have an impact on Dad's daughters

If I'm not right with me, how can I pass it on?

I got a pact today, I know, and I can't knock it off

And if I'm blinded by the light, then I can't walk with God

Don't wanna realize later He was with me all along

Loving me, being free, bringing peace, leave these wings

Tryna fly to my peak, I reside eye to eye

The divine in my reach as I strive and I seek

Live light, proceed, love me for me

At ease

[Ciara:]

It's alright, I been to the bottom, and I've seen the end

Wanna forever be together 'til the end

And I found the problem, it starts with me

I figured out now what I want, got what I need

(Ladies, help me sing it out now)

Damn right, yeah, I love myself

I'm never gon' fall 'cause I love myself

Damn right, yeah, I love myself

And I can have it all 'cause I love myself

I'm not tripping, it's not fate

No, I'm not selfish, nope

No more holding back on me, I'm feeling free

Only happy tears I'll cry, I swear, this time, I'll get it right

It's the best thing God could ever do for me, hey

No more drama, no more pain

No drama, no drama, no pain

I'm done making same mistakes, ayy

It's alright, I been to the bottom, and I've seen the end

Wanna forever be together 'til the end

And I found the problem, it starts with me

I figured out now what I want, got what I need

(Ladies, help me sing it out now)

Damn right, yeah, I love myself

I'm never gon' fall 'cause I love myself

Damn right, yeah, I love myself

And I can have it all 'cause I love myself

Playing hopscotch with ya life

Couple heartbreaks 'til you get it right

Sometimes, you gotta fall

Sometimes, you lose it all

That's when you get it right

Taking shortcuts get ya cut short (Yep)

Never ever settle when you know your worth (Never)

You gotta free your soul, you gotta take control

That's how I got it right

It's alright, I been to the bottom, and I've seen the end

Wanna forever be together 'til the end

And I found the problem (I found the problem)

It starts with me (It starts with me)

I figured out now what I want, got what I need

(Ladies, help me sing it out now)

Damn right, yeah, I love myself

I'm never gon' fall 'cause I love myself (Ayy)

Damn right, yeah, I love myself

And I can have it all 'cause I love myself

Damn right, yeah, I love myself

I'm never gon' fall 'cause I love myself

Damn right, yeah, I love myself

And I can have it all 'cause I love myself

[Stilltrying_]

Wow, I can so relate to the "tired of being tired thing". I would suggest you give it a try. I know it is hard and you are worried about failing but just take it each day at a time and do your best. And try and keep yourself as physically healthy as possible; vitamins, exercise etc. and make sure you are not overmedicated as that can cause problems in my opinion. I am not saying don't medicate at all but make sure they are right for you and at a safe level. x

[Hidden]

I like your response! I haven’t figured out how to get back into exercising. I loved running and kickboxing. I use to have a personal trainer but I can’t afford one anymore. My body is so use to lack of exercise lately that if I tried to start walking fast (similar to jogging) my body would burn & itch badly. Which I’ve researched. Some call it runners itch but it’s also known as urticaria. It’s really uncomfortable...sometimes it goes away after working out overtime but you never know when. But I’m going to try. Maybe I should try to run at night. Just Incase I breakout 🙆🏾‍♀️😪

[Cara78]

Hi, my name is Cara, i have struggled for years with mental health. I now feel that the more i push myself the better i can get. I have learned that what other people think of me is none of my buisness and that no one really has that perfect life or mind, its an illusion, i dont go on social media, its false and makes me worse, i take magnesium for anti anxiety, i eat well when i try, im learning to love myself for who i am and how far ive came, i make mistakes still but im only human. Ive learned to forgive myself and others especially my mum as my relationship was poor with her throughout the years. No one has it easy on this planet, please believe me, its a tough planet to be on but if we give ourselves good thoughts, read good books, keep good company and forgive and love ourselves it gets easier, you deserve a life, your strong, go for it and grab what you can and own it. Ive been through the mill, im 40 now, you can create anything you wish. All the best, Cara

[Hidden in reply to Cara78]

Wow thank you for that response Cara ! Do you have any recommendations on books ? Please don’t be a stranger!?

[Cara78]

Il have a think on that and get back to you. Im working on forgiving myself and others at the moment, ive made mistakes, but im only human and if i can master living in today and not think too much about past or future i can get peace, and loving myself and accepting the way i am 100%. All i can do is my best and not put huge limits on myself, take it easy and remember im not perfect, not even the kardashians lol. Its all false and money isnt everthing either. Il get back to you on books babe, we are worth it. Xxx

[Hidden in reply to Cara78]

Okay thanks 🥰...oh, Happy Mother’s Day 🙂

[cowen2019]

The only way you truly fail is if you stop. So long as you keep trying you never truly fail. Make sure you ask for help and look into everything go to student support and get as much help as you can. Wish I knew about it when I was at Uni instead of struggling so much. The other option is to start a small short course and work your way up. Every time you finish and pass it will give you a boost. There are a few I can recommend depending on where you are. Have you tried asking if you can finish the courses you started? Good Luck.

[Hidden]

You made some valid points! I will definitely make sure I exhaust all resources. I am interested in your recommendations! I did consider finishing the previous programs but I decided not to.