dreams 2

[emparedados]

I remember walking around the school filed, I can remember the bushes and the bees and the smells. I walked around chatting to him, and he's not there. I can see him but he's incorporeal. I know I'm just talking to myself but I want it to be real. Its like a memory of a dream made real.

I'm talking to myself, I know I am. I'm re-living memories of happier times, I know I am. But it all felt so solid that I cant help thinking - did my past really happen? Am I really remembering somthing ? its all in my head and to be honest I'm finding it hard to find the line between reality and fiction.

---

When I wake I know it was a dream, and yet I have the same mental hang-over I used to get from LSD. That displaced and thick feeling - like stress when somethings not quite right mixed with extreme tiredness and strong coffee.

-- PS -- this isnt a post for help, I needed to write this down so I could articulate it. I dunno if anyone else if having dreams tat are making them question reality. -- TBH I keep thinking I see someone out of the corner of my eye. Maybe I'm just going crazy.

I've no idea whats going on anymore tbh hahha

[Hidden]

I question reality even when I'm not dreaming.

For example when I logged in on here about 10 minutes ago I somehow thought this was something where a computer just replied to your post, instead of an actual person.

Even though I have been on here before...

[emparedados in reply to Hidden]

I get that, phasing in and out and not knowing if I did something or not. I swear I think I'm loosing it XD

[Hidden in reply to emparedados]

Do you have a doctor you can see and explain all this too, to see if they can give you anything to help?

[emparedados in reply to Hidden]

I'm already on 100mg of sertaline, I asked for an increased dosage cos 50mg was just leaving me with full on rage.

I think its stress from my job change thats bubbling up and just exacerbating things :/

[Hidden in reply to emparedados]

yeah the job change could be the reason

well its good you asked your doctor for an increase. Have you been on the 100mg for long?

[emparedados in reply to Hidden]

11 days - big increase in outward mood, my head feels like a tornado in a bottle too small for my head thats in a tumble dryer tho.

[20Voices]

I have had dreams in the past where I have not been sure whether I have been dreaming or if I was awake.

I've even had dreams where I have known because of the stupid content of them that they were dreams and been screaming at myself to wake up, but haven't.

The mind if a wonderful and mysterious thing and it is fascinating how it can use our memories as well as imagination to come up with some really weird dreams and feelings.

The imagination is a great thing. I used to spend a lot of time when I was competing imaging where I was and winning. It can help build confidence and make you feel like you have done something a hundred times.

I hope writing down your dream has helped you.

Take care. XX