First post, Dating a girl with bipola... - Mental Health Sup...

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First post, Dating a girl with bipolar disorders.

Voice_for_voiceless profile image

I've been in a relationship with my girlfriend for 2 and a half years, and for the most part it's been great. But recently we became a bit distant. She has hip displacia and has been weighting for an operation for years. She is scheduled to get the operation next month after having it put back twice in the last five months. She's been having a bad episode since before Christmas and after a few arguments recently she asked me to move out today, so she can sort her head out.

Any advice? Plus helpful information about bipolar would be Appreciated aswel.

Thank you

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Voice_for_voiceless profile image
Voice_for_voiceless
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8 Replies
MAS_Nurse profile image
MAS_Nurse

Hello Voice_for_voiceless

Thank you for your message. Welcome to this community.

You sound as if you are a very caring and positive person. It can't be easy for you being asked to move out at the moment. This is a supportive community, so our members may have more information and be able to help with your questions.

Perhaps you can tell us more about you and your girlfriend's relationship and what has been happening?

It sounds as if she has a lot to cope with while waiting for her operation which could have an effect on her bi-polar.

The pinned posts and topics may offer you more information about her conditions.

You might want to encourage her to speak to a support worker or GP about what is happening for her if this is possible.

Take care and keep in touch

Voice_for_voiceless profile image
Voice_for_voiceless in reply toMAS_Nurse

Thanks for your response. Our relationship for the most part has been great, in terms of the arguments to me they were just small disagreements but I think her mental state of mind made her feel worse. One of the big issues is while I try and get her to talk to me about how she feels, she feels at times she can't and I'm supposed to be the person she can open up to which is hard.

She is in touch with her gp and because she's at college she is talking to people there aswel.

Again thank you for your time and reply.

Betty30 profile image
Betty30

Hi, I know people get used to me giving the same ol', same ol' advice...:) but here goes: Voice, please...and keep this to yourself...make some appts to visit with a well qualified, certified therapist.... I think you need 'fortification' and sort of a 'help line'...it doesn't mean you are 'weak'...but YOU HAVE TO look out for yourself, too.... I am not speaking 'against' your girlfriend...but bipolar can be tricky to deal with...and I believe you would feel better if you were given some advice from someone detached from everything emotionally...to give you some ideas as to how to handle situations when they come up. You deserve that...please consider this...Best wishes!!

Vonnah profile image
Vonnah in reply toBetty30

Great advice. I agree👍

macaroonblue profile image
macaroonblue in reply toBetty30

if i may add-on; anything ur gf says or does, dont take it personally, let her have her space but dont go far from her - this is what my bf been doing to keep our relationship strong this far, he also put aside time for himself, for him to enjoy life and has his own hobby. I hope this helpful. I sometimes has my own breakdown moment and my bf just try to calm me down and really separate my episode from his feelings, I dont know how he does this but its really helpful and protect him from feeling hurt. Also, after everything is okay, we will talk about it and the talk is really helpful to make me rethink my action.

also this is just a sharing, im not trying to teach anything as im not a certified medical practitioners, i apologies if might not helpful or tryin to sound like a smartass 😁

side note: my bf has a schizophrenia sister, so maybe thats why he seems so understand towards my struggle aswell.

anyway, keep ur head up and thank you for being a great partner to ur gf.

Thank you for taking time to reply to me. And I will definitely consider your advice :)

Foof profile image
Foof

Wow. You’re a keeper 😊😊😊😊

Is she testing you? By asking you to leave when maybe she doesn’t really want that?

I concur that the above advice about looking after yourself and getting support regarding understanding her condition. I’m sure there are support groups for partners and close family members of people with bipolar...you may identify some common themes and coping strategies.

Take care x

I am now 60. Diagnosed with bipolarIl in2015. Misdiagnosed with depression from early 20s. Had 3 marriage and divorce. I was up and down emotionally and unaware of the way I was behaving. Since being on epilim for last 8 years I have been fine. So a decent psychiatrist, gp and perhaps counsellor are paramount. If she can become stable I am sure she will fine and hopefully your relationship will be better. Perhaps talk about it and give her space if she needs it. Hope that helps. X

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