Advice??

[nursejillian]

I have issues withy relationships due to anxiety. Sometimes i worry i don’t have feeling for my significant other and other times I’m over the top about him. I just want to follow my gut and that’s so difficult when it changes every single day. Any advice?

[Patientlywaiting5]

Are you on any medication for anxiety?

[nursejillian in reply to Patientlywaiting5]

No i am not. I was previously, but I’m not at this time.

[MAS_Nurse]

Hello nursejillian,

Have you considered talking therapies as these can help you identify the underlying issues, negative thought patterns and repetitive unhelpful behaviours, that may be driving your anxieties? You may find this info helpful:

mind.org.uk/information-sup...

What do you folks on here think, any advice?

Keep in touch, let us know how you are doing.

Best wishes.

[nursejillian in reply to MAS_Nurse]

I have not! Thank you! I guess i just worry that it’s not anxiety. But i don’t know how to tell.

[Frozenimages]

I'm sorry to hear you are feeling these up and down feelings. I saw your post and had to respond. I too am finding myself in the same predicament. My husband has mental illness that causes very wild mood and emotional swings. About three days ago, I loathed him. He was deregulating something horrible on one of his episodes. I even thought about grabbing our youngest child and running far away from him. Last night he was being happy loving playful. I understand that this is caused by his illness, but it makes it so hard to know how I truly feel about him.

Does your significant other do something that makes you feel this way? Is there something that sets you off? Or do you feel that they aren't doing anything different but your anxiety is taking control of your feelings?

[nursejillian in reply to Frozenimages]

I feel he isn’t doing anything to cause my fluctuating feelings. I’m sorry to hear about your situation!

[Frozenimages in reply to nursejillian]

Thank you. It's okay though. Was there maybe something in your past that might be the source of the fluctuation? I once was told that until I found the root of certain problems, I could keep pulling the weed, but it would keep coming back.

Did the medication you were taking before help at all? Do you think this might be something you could fix on your own or would need to go back on medication?

[nursejillian in reply to Frozenimages]

I was with a guy and forced myself to be with him. He was very good to me, but i wasn’t attracted to him, i never had that honeymoon phase, and it just didn’t feel right. This guy is different but i think I’m afraid of making the same mistake. Medication helps greatly. I’m just not exactly in the place to see a psychiatrist at this moment.

[AjMiki]

This has been an ongoing problem in my life to a point were I am now single for the last 4 years, but free of the relationship anxieties, which I think took over 90% of my live over the past 20 years!

Trust me nursejillian it's a problem that affects a lot of people out there, usually the ones who turn jealous over there other half, for no apparent reason!

You get moody, you get loving, you what them to feel your pain and anguish, you want them to love you, hold you, but ultimately you want it all on your terms!

What I've worked on over the last few years is changing my thought patterns, we can't follow our gut feeling when the mind becomes king...I've improved significantly thanks to. CBT therapy and sporadic counselling, so I would personally recommend you seek some help that way and trust me, this will help massively in what I call 'realisation'

[nursejillian in reply to AjMiki]

Thank you so much! It’s nice to know it’s kind of normal. When I’m with him i just feel happy. I guess I’m struggling to figure out what is my gut and what is anxiety.