Falling hard and fast

[Clarebear86]

So I’ve had a fair few days of feeling good. I had a bit of a busy day yesterday, did a lot achieved a lot. Today it seems I appear to be paying the price.

[Pocha45]

Why are you paying the price?

[Clarebear86 in reply to Pocha45]

I don’t know seemed to make complete sense at the time. Just sometimes feels like I’m not meant to be happy.

[Pocha45 in reply to Clarebear86]

Girl im laying here almost in tears I'm 36 and this episode is the worse! I left my job to get well and after all these months it is like up and down now my love left me i need to work i have no energy I'm still afraid of starting over my self esteem is low because of the depression the pills aren't working. One dayI'm ok the next I feel like crap. Everyone around me is happy and i want to be there again holidays are here and I can't even feel it. Sorry i sound negative but this is scary when you can't break free

[Clarebear86 in reply to Pocha45]

I’m currently off work sick due to everything going on. The tablets are working for me, i’m sorry to hear they aren’t for you. It just feels like such a fall, when you’ve had such a good spell. I’m sorry to hear about your problems. But hang in there and keep fighting, we all deserve to be here despite our thoughts and feelings at times.

[marigold22]

Hi, I've read this post of yours, and gone back to read your very first post. You are having a tough time. I have very recently recovered from a 36 year illness which was an auto immune disease - hypothyroidism (well in fact it turned out to be Hashimotos Thyroiditis after having a private blood test.) Hypothyroidism is a horrible slow progressive illness, which attacks the thyroid. The thyroid is an endocrine gland, which is vital for many body functions. If it is running low, there are up to 100 symptoms. I am also on the Thyroid section of healthunlocked and have learnt so so much from them. It's a very complicated illness to recover from, but only because GPs and even Professors of Endocrinology (the top specialists) do not understand or are incapable of interpreting the blood tests. On the thyroid forum there is an outcrying of pure frustration and anger at how they are being treated as patients. It does sound to me like you could have a thyroid disorder.

Also I have learnt that if our vitamin D and/or vit B12 is very low, we get symptoms of depression and anxiety. Also if our folate, ferritin & iron in our blood are low, then again these symptoms rear their head. GPs order blood tests but very sadly, in the main, do not do their job properly. If for example the blood range of vitamin B12 is 100 - 200 and a patient's B12 blood test result returns as 101, then that patient will feel ghastly, but the GP will tick it off as ok. Vitamin B12, for example, needs to be at the top of the range to feel well. I'm sorry if this is a bit confusing but this is what I have very sadly learnt from the thyroid forum. If you would like any more info - how to go about getting thyroid blood test or vitamin & mineral etc blood tests, how to interpret etc... please do contact me. I cannot bear to hear of all the suffering because of the medical fraternity not doing their jobs properly. Not sure if you have seen your GP, a cousellor, or you have any other diagnosed illness, but also I have learnt over the last few months from a Homeopath doctor that our diet is absolutely vital to get correct to feel well. Again I can send you details of how I started eating in August 2017 and by October 2017, I was magically like a different person. Until August 2017 I was still getting suicidal periods, deep depression, paranoia, agoraphobia, high anxiety. All gone now. Take care.

[Zoea in reply to marigold22]

What a good post! I would just like to point out, for our readers, from what I've researched (and I haven't exactly looked into it like a PhD lol) B12 is not greatly absorbed from the gut. If you look up High Strength B12 patches on ebay (or similar, I use an ebay supplier) you can get a square patch that you apply to your skin on your wrist or hand or 'good absorption place' that may also contain other beneficial compounds that really works surprisingly well. I've been using these patches for over a year and they are super effective. When you get proper B12 in you it's honestly like magic. I recommend this for everyone - you only need a patch every month or two really (the body is thankfully able to absorb and store B12 for up to a year I believe.... ..) and the results are completely brilliant. Try it folk.=

[marigold22 in reply to Zoea]

Thanks Zoea , I have never heard of B12 patches

[marigold22]

I have had fantastic results since August 2017 by cutting out all grains, cutting out as much sugar as possible, keeping in mind that fruit contains sugar. I have added good fats. I don't call it a Diet - I call it a Special way of eating.

This way of eating has turned my life around... at long last. I know everyone is different but worth a try.

I have explained the exact reasons why certain foods are cut out and certain foods are added in.

Carbohydrates and sugar spike the blood sugar up and the body has to work hard to get the blood sugar down again. If it has to continually work at reducing blood sugar, something will go wrong. …. …..Insulin and cortisol.

Fruit also has a fair amount of sugar so I’m only allowed to eat a small amount (one piece a day maximum, or some berries). Bananas are very high in sugar.

The above two – carbohydrates and sugar/fruit – diabetics will know to cut these out.

Grains – are all a form of “grass” & our body has problems digesting it. Cows eat grass and have three stomachs to digest it. For humans to digest any of the grains, it takes energy and causes problems in our digestive system. This way of eating is about cutting out GRAINS, so even any type of gluten free bread is a big No No.

Also all carbohydrates are to be cut out. Therefore no rice as it is a carbohydrate. Certainly not pasta, bread, Ryvita, porridge, biscuits of any sort, as it’s all made from grain of some sort. You need to think what a food is made of to work out if you can eat it. No grains, no carbohydrates, very low amount of sugar, absolutely no soy. Anything that has been ‘manufactured’ – you need to check the label to see what’s in it; many items have added sugar, added carbohydrates. In fact I don’t now eat anything that has been ‘messed about’ with by any manufacturer.

Our brain is made of around 80% fat, therefore it needs good fats in order to function properly. The advice we were given to eat a low fat diet, in my view, has caused a lot of depression in the population.

No doubt the pharmaceutical companies put that out so they could sell more anti-depressants (?)

Recommended to eat - full fat milk, cream, real butter (+ melted over veg), olive oil, cheese, cream cheese, eggs, meat including bacon (not sausages), oily fish (tinned mackerel is my favourite), white fish, plain bio yoghurt, all vegetables (I make veg soup with a blender), all salad items, avocados, nuts (not salted or roasted), beans (I buy tins of mixed beans & baked beans from supermarket & drain off liquid), tinned prunes (delicious with cream!). There are other foods that are ok – eg pulses, sauerkraut (which I’ve googled how to make & about to try making it), Hellmans mayonnaise, Bovril, cocoa powder (not drinking chocolate - it's 70% sugar) in warm milk, Lindt high cocoa chocolate slab, Not meant to eat potatoes as they are high carbohydrate (I have a little), also a small amount of sweet potato but all potatoes are carbohydrates which this diet forbids.

Example of one day’s meals & snacks ----

Breakfast : Hard boiled egg with cream cheese or Bacon & egg

Morning snack : Mug of warmed full fat milk & half an apple or Home made vegetable soup

Lunch : Tinned mackerel with any salad items (+ mayo)

or Handful of nuts + cottage cheese with tomatoes or any salad item

Afternoon snack : Bio yoghurt with cream mixed in + 3 prunes or a few defrosted raspberries

Supper : Chicken or any meat with mixture of vegetables with melted butter over veg

[gkskfangs]

Sorry to hear that you are not in a good time now. I do get what you're talking about. Sometimes it makes me wonder too, if something bad would happen when I finally feel better and happy. It never really lasted long, because my brain sure has its own way to drag me into the pit of sadness again. If anyone could help me stop overthinking/over-analysing, it would be very helpful. But I wonder if you could tell what has caused you to be in this low mood now? Or is it something you couldn't really define yourself?