lost direction

[Aitch56]

Gosh where do I start? I am almost 56 and have landed with a large thud on the scrap heap of life. I have been on anti-depressants for about a year now, which at the beginning were a big help, especially with my hot flushes. (menopause). Too much has happened in my life since April 2015 when everything changed and went downhill and I find myself unable to cope with all the changes. Some days I wake up and think I look okay and I feel positive but most mornings I wake up and think 'oh gawd, another day has dawned'. I find it hard to leave the house. I would rather just stay safe at home and not have to see or speak to anyone. I am trying to find a job, which is fine when I feel upbeat but when I feel miserable and low everything becomes such an effort. Even eating. I thought about telling the doctor but she wouldn't be able to do anything constructive and anyhow that means making the effort and getting out the house which I really cannot be arsed to do. Not today anyway.

[Hidden]

Hello I am so sorry you are going through. this, it really sounds hard I am here if you want to talk. I hope you will start to feel better do you have any close people who could listen and support, the thing about illness is you need friends. I too struggle with getting out and low self-esteem I am sure your a truly lovely person who deserves tot be happy please keep going and look forward to better things

[Aitch56 in reply to Hidden]

aw thanks Newto for taking the time to reply. Yes I have a good support network, but they don't always want to hear me constantly moaning and complaining. There are plenty of people who have it much worse than I do and I feel guilty for feeling miserable when I have a roof over my head, food in the fridge and no serious health problems. But depression can bite and sometimes it just won't let go.

[Hidden in reply to Aitch56]

How are you doing better I hope😐

[Aitch56 in reply to Hidden]

feeling okay at the moment, thank you