Hard times

Hi,

I have been suffering with some form of depression for 10 years. I have my good times but I never feel totally connected with life. Like I just don't feel what other people feel. I don't get excited or really happy about anything. The only emotion I feel really acutely is sadness and when I am going through a tough time everything makes me sad. Like I physically feel the pain and sadness of other peoples bad times. Does anybody else feel this? I am having a tough time at the moment and I am finding it really hard to connect with my husband. I don't feel like I even love him anymore.

Thanks for reading, some insight would be great.

8 Replies

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  • Reading your message made me think it could have been me writing it Roosta . I can relate to everything in your post. I have found that everything is a chore and like yourself, I can't feel happy or excited about much at all. I was crying like a baby yesterday after reading the news about the flats in London that had burned and how many people died. What with all the terrible tragedies that have been happening in Manchester and London, it all seemed to hit me of how many people are suffering terribly and it hit me hard! So I fully connect with you regarding feeling other people's suffering. I then try and think that I should try and be thankful that I haven't had anything so tragic happen in my life, but it isn't always easy. As for the husband bit, I too have those feelings. I find myself moaning about him over the silliest of things and it probably isn't really worth even thinking about let alone moaning about it! It's hard when we all feel depressed as we all want to just live in our own little bubble and keep ourselves away from the world, but life won't allow us that. The good thing is, we can all relate to things on this site and in all honesty this site has helped me tremendously with a lot Iot. Keep in contact with us all and hopefully you won't feel so alone.

    Xxx

  • Thank you for your response. It definitely helps to know other people have similar feelings. I got so upset about the Manchester attack that I think it triggered this bad phase for me again. But I just couldn't help it, I felt like I had lost someone and yet I didn't even know anyone in the tragedy. I don't understand why I would feel such intense sadness about something that doesn't even directly affect me. Don't get me started on adverts, I cry at wateraid adverts????

    Thanks and I hope you feel stronger soon.

  • Due to the fact that you're feeling so low in yourself, I think it's perfectly normal for a person to get upset over others' tragedies. I too couldn't help but get upset when the Manchester tragedy happened. I felt so much for the people involved, especially with so many young ones also being cut down when they all had so much to live for. My youngest daughter is the same at as a lot of those that were killed and it started me off thinking about how would I ever cope. If that should ever happen to me or my loved ones. The thing with these kind of tragedies is that we tend to associate ourselves with the situations, as let's face it, it could have been us. It's all just down to being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Unfortunately that's life. My personal view is that even though we never knew any one person directly, it will never stop the caring you and most people have for humanity. It's the way most of us are built lol! Never feel that you are alone when you're thinking those thoughts there are many of us that suffer the same thoughts and feelings.

    Thank you for your kind words too. I am finding being able to talk on here with people who have more of an understanding is helping me, and being able to help others is in itself therapy too, if that makes any sense?

    Take care and keep in touch. Xx

  • Hi Roosta I am sorry you are feeling so bad at this time. It is good that you have come to this site as many of us feel and think pretty much the same, therefore we can all support each other and swap ideas. I think the word we are looking for here is EMPATHY, this is where we feel other peoples sadness etc. I feel like this too so these feelings are actually more common than we think. It is naturally instilled in us to feel love and kindness in humanity, I just wish there was more people like this in the world then maybe, just maybe the world would be a better place. Please keep in touch on here as its like a therapy too , Take care.

  • Hi Nessie71,

    Thank you for your response. Its good to know there are people in the same boat. It makes me feel less of a freak. Also it helps to not have to fight these feeling off all the time. Maybe just having a good cry at some of these things will help release it. I don't know but I am willing to try anything to feel a little less sad.

    Many thanks xxx

  • It's okay to feel sad. It's okay to feel like that, all the time. You just have to remember you have people around, people on this website, who are willing to listen to you. When you feel sad, because someone else it's sad, it acts like a trigger. But it's okay, it's okay to feel like that. It's hard to connect with life, but that's fine, some people see life I'm a different perspective. Many people can relate to you, you're not alone. There are people you can talk to, all around you. It's normal to feel sad.

  • Thank you for taking the time to reply to me. I really appreciate your insights and your help.

  • This sounds like my life. I was on a lot of medication & as I still wasn't feeling great, suicidal even, I took a leap of faith to come off all meds. This sent me into a spin (many around me called it 'hyper' & I upset my kids so much (age 13 & 15) that my husband felt it was best for me to move out of the family home. I now feel a lot calmer & that I've brought all this upset on myself & that I'm no use to anyone. I desperately want to not wake up again. I've researched so many methods of suicide but there's few that are full proof & I can't bear the thought of coming back to face my family in the aftermath of an attempt. Never mind find the actual courage to go through with it. Life, even as easy as I have been fortunate enough to have it, is too overwhelming for me on a daily basis. 😢

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