New to this. Just wanted to say hello. :)

Hello,

Not sure quite how this works but hello. Trying to get some support and advice I guess and feel a little less alone with all of this. Hope this is the right place for that. Thanks

[Photogeek]

Hi there and welcome. Maybe if you could tell us a little of what's

Happening , it would be easier for you.

It's a supportive Forum if a little quiet right now.

Hannah

[Chris76]

Hi There

I can't say enough good things about this site it's full of really great people who will go out of their way to help people.

Photo is right, open up a little and people will help if they can x

Chris

[angse]

Hi Irish eyes

You are defiantly on the right site, everyone is so caring, and you will always have someone who will listen to you, you have not mentioned if you have seen a doctor, if you haven't don't be like me and leave it for a year, depression does not go away, lot of help out there, don't be afraid to use it, and Welcome. Annette

[Hidden]

Hello everyone,

I'll give a little potted history as per your suggestions and thanks for replying

I had some kind of breakdown some years ago in my early twenties and was sectioned in hospital. It's a pretty blurred period but I remember a lot of fear and confusion and depression and was treated for psychosis....due to completely losing contact with reality. I was involved with psychiatric services for a few years following and then managed to disengage from services. Apart from one particularly good and kind psychiatrist I don't have good memories of this time. I managed to come off most meds which I just couldn't tolerate (antipsychotics) and just stayed on anti depressants...which I really want to not be on. Anyway I managed to complete a degree and a masters and begin work with some difficulties along the way but seemed to be making headway. Then last year out of nowhere I became delusional, started to struggle (though I had little insight) then became very depressed, had to stop work for 4 months etc etc. This has been more shocking to me than the initial episode and things just feel like they've changed. I can't seem to get on since. I moved jobs, cities and house after the last episode so was able almost to bury it all. But I can't seem to manage. I'm scared of the future and the past now. I feel stupid and

disconnected from things. I guess that's why I came here. Sorry for the ramble. Thanks x

[Obriens3]

Hi there, have you been back to the GP or psychiatrist after this recent episode ? You don't say. I think this would be a first step as something's you can't just deal with alone.

[Stilltrying_]

Yes I would agree with Obrien. It must be very difficult for you facing all this again but at least you are recognising what it is you are going through which is a good start and I agree that you need to see your doctor or pyschiatrist if you have one and explain what is happening for you right now. Wishing you the best x

[Hidden]

No I haven't seen a psychiatrist again. I don't want to be in the system again. Nor to be told to take more medications. I can't live like that. Feels a bit fecking hopeless to be honest.

[Hidden]

SICK OF IT

[Hidden]

Am I the only person that can't deal with that? I feel stuck between a rock and a hard place. I'm angry about all of this. I want to be left alone... by everything...but I'm so scared. I'm writing on here to who I have no idea. I'm tired of failing tired of trying.

[Hidden]

I didn't mean anyone on here. I have been thankful for people's words. x

[Hidden]

Sorry

[Obriens3]

Don't be sorry. There is no need. I still think you should go back to the doc and get some professional help. Xx

[Obriens3]

There is nothing wrong with taking medication if it makes you feel better. I also take medication long term and am grateful for the relief that it gives me. I continue with a successful career and normal relationship. If you are delusional then that can be dangerous both to yourself and others so take the help available xx

[Hidden]

Thanks for your reply. I am grateful because I feel so confused and lonely with this. I feel so angry and frightened that things didn't work. I am losing hope and feel very trapped. I don't know what to believe now. I don't want to be tricked in to anything. It's all such a mess.

[Obriens3]

From what you say, you are trapped in your own torment, and not thinking rationally right now. Don't be afraid, you are not alone. Please take my advice and go to the doctor. Believe me there is light at the end of the tunnel, and if medication helps it's not your enemy. There may also be other solutions such as counselling. I wish you well x

[Hidden]

I feel like the options are limited. Everything's become filtered, sound, light, time. It all stops just before it gets to me but I can see it and feel it. I just don't feel I can interpret it anymore. There isn't a connection there that is purposeful. That to me is rational and that is frightening. I wish I wasn't part of this crap. I don't think I can be.

[Hidden]

It's all said.

[Hidden]

Thank you thank you thank you