sorry!

[secondhandrose2]

Hi everyone

I just want to say sorry for not writing much on the site at the moment. I feel that you all supported me and that as a result I have been able to move forward, and I know I supported some of you at the time but at the moment I read what everyone has written but just can't get into taking it in and thinking about it in order to respond much. I feel it's taking all my effort to just keep moving myself forward.

I hope you don't mind that I'm not offering much back at the moment. I am doing well really, struggling at times with finding the energy to keep from being depressed but managing it. I am now walking each weekend, one week with one group and the next with another, alternately, and it's paying off in that although I am not losing much weight I am definitely losing inches! I am delighted to find I can now fit into trousers I doubted whether would ever fit me - really great stretch chinos in bright pink and a purply pink from M & S - and I always have wanted to be back in bright trousers so it's something of a milestone for me. Got a few health problems which are being investigated - I know they COULD be serious but am holding onto the fact that probably they are not. For once I am enjoying life most of the time, the weekend Rambles keep me going through each week.

I haven't forgotten you all and just wanted you to know that, I read on the site every day and although I sometimes respond often I don't. Perhaps I am scared of going back into depression, I don't know, but whatever it is I am grateful to you all, it's great to know you are all still there and respond when I need to post.

I ALMOST miss needing to post every day and reading your responses - except I don't really want that because it is good to be feeling better for a while.

I hope you all have some periods of respite too, it's positive for me to find I CAN pull out of depression for a while and that there is some light at the end of that dark tunnel some of you will remember my being in a year or more ago. I hope you all find some light moments too.

Take care,

Suexxx

[21esme]

Sue,

You've worked hard and deserve what you have achieved and continue to achieve. I have a few clothes in the loft I don't think I'll ever fit into again!

Your positive story helps a lot of people,me included. It shows that there really can be some light and hope.

I would love to know how the walk went on Sunday? How was the weather?

I'm proud of you.

Sarah xxx

[secondhandrose2 in reply to 21esme]

Hi Sarah

Thanks for your positive feedback - Sunday weather, well it was like winter apart from not as cold - driving rain, almost gale force winds and we walked across a high exposed ridge for miles then had to climb gates etc, pretty hard going for me, but I'm glad I went.

How are you? I hope you are feeling reasonably ok. By clothes that won't fit I presume you mean too big - or too small? If they are too small - well why not in time? If too big, how come?

Suexxx

[21esme in reply to secondhandrose2]

Too small. I always start a healthy eating plan and then don't stick to it. Best to stick to buying handbags.lol

I'm doing okay to goodish. Trying to be positive as well.

Xx

[Hidden]

Sue I am very pleased you are feeling so much better. Positive stories are great and give us all something to aim for. Don't apologise please as you are usually one of the first ones to respond to posts and you have helped so many of us including me.

Don't jeapardise your feeling better by getting too involved. If you need to opt out somewhat then that's what you must do and I am sure everyone is so pleased for you. Carry on trucking sweetheart xx

[secondhandrose2 in reply to Hidden]

Thanks, that's lovely. I just read how some people need support and feel that I should be reading them in detail and thinking about them but find that at the moment I just don't have the energy for that, though I do have energy for walking - and that makes me feel guilty.

What we do to ourselves, eh! xx

[Photogeek in reply to secondhandrose2]

Hi Sue I have replied to you earlier, and now I can see that you

May be feeling a bit burnt out. Sue you did in fairness tend to write

Quite long therapeutic answers to different people, whereas sometimes

All people want is a few words, as here everyone knows we cannot solve anyone's real problems in an answer, at least that's been my opinion.

Sue oh please don't feel you have to reply. To any Posts, you have

Always done that, so please take a wee break and a breather.

Sue the only worry I have about you is that you are taking on

A lot with all this walking, maybe you are overdoing it? And it's

Leaving you with no physical or emotional energy for other things.

If you think I am talking rubbish ignore me.

One way or another

Sue I have always loved to read your replys,. I got a lot out

Of them all so think of all

The people you have helped.

Is Themsy still around ?he hasn't been visible for ages . It would be great

If we had a bit of interaction here from the Administrators, as the Living

With Anxiety Site have a good few Administrators and you really get

A feel for them as they are so visibly present online every day.

Sue all this is just a thought really and maybe I am being out of

Order but at times this Forum feels like a rudderless ship.

Hannah xx

[Photogeek in reply to secondhandrose2]

Sue don't be feeling guilty because you have energy for walking. You

Are entitled to enjoy yourself in life . I.e. Walking etc. it's great that

You do it and are enjoying it. Enjoyment is allowed and just pop

Back in when you want to, Sue don't feel " you should " or that it

Is a duty. Take that pressure off yourself Sue

Hannah x

[SLSL]

Hey Sue,

Glad to see you survived the walk!

I really don't understand why you are apologising. I only joined two weeks ago and I think you're one of the voices I see here most and your posts are so helpful.

It's good to hear cheerful news and I am very happy for you and the last thing you must do now is to feel guilty.

Anyway I'm sure you'll be checking in from time to time anyway - between your walks keep enjoying them xx

[secondhandrose2 in reply to SLSL]

Thank you. xx

[Suzie40]

You give what you can, when you can, and that's the beauty of a forum like this. You have been a kind and supportive friend to me since the day I joined this site and you are often in my thoughts x

[secondhandrose2 in reply to Suzie40]

Thanks Lucy, that's a lovely thing to say. I value your support too. xx

[WantToChange]

Hi Sue,

Don't worry about neglecting the site. It is more important (and I'm sure everyone will agree) that you get yourself better.

I'm glad you're moving forward, I hope you continue to.

Feel free to pop in and say hello, we'd like to know how you are getting on :).

All the best xx

[Stilltrying_]

Sue I feel you are in demand because you are very wise, so in a way it is a compliment but also of course first and foremost it is important to look after yourself ; and of course we should never support when it is at the expense of our own growth or comfort.

I know that I treasure your input and always grow from what you have written to help me and so I am one of the ones guilty of "needing" you if you like but of course please only give what you can Sue. I am glad you are managing the walking and feeling that bit better in yourself.

Lots of love, Gemma X

[Photogeek]

Hi Sue

I'm late reading this Post as I have been away for a week.

Sue oh don't worry about feeling the need to reply to anyone or everyone. I usually

Too read all posts and I reply if I feel my reply would help a bit.

Mind you I'm I'm feeling well in myself, I don't find it Depressing to read other

Peoples posts, I seem to be able to separate the two.

Sue correct me if I have got the wrong end of the stick here, but are you saying

That you are afraid that reading the Posts of people with Depression could drag you down.

I'm really glad your enjoying the walking and losing a bit of weight, so good luck

With that, would you would feel if you don't stay in touch here. Even when your feeling well, that if a time comes when you feel down and need someone to talk to, that you

May have distanced yourself from the people here.

Sue it's just a thought, personally I would not feel the Forum would affect my happiness

If I was happy.

Sue I just get the impression from your writing and the unsaid that you don't

Feel you relate to us here.

Sue your replys to me have really helped me and made me think about a

Lot of stuff. So thank you for that. I would really miss you if you left the Forum,

All though I do admit that some posts can be repetitive and it's like reinventing

The wheel.lol

Sue please look after your physical health as that's important at our age.

Hannah x