What to say at work. : Hi All.I had an... - Men's Health Foru...

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What to say at work.

Clars1003 profile image
24 Replies

Hi All.I had an adult circumsion at age 35.

I took paid sick leave at work, initially I was taking annual leave but why should I when I am entitled to sick leave.

I had to inform my manager and HR that I was channing to sick leave due to having to go into hospital for an operation and it was approved.

But my manager asked what op I am going for, I said sorry it's personal...

While I have been out of the office,

I am sure other colleagues have asked where I was and it's probably known that I went to hospital for an operation.

I am just thinking about when I return to work everyone is going to ask me what I went for!!!!!!

Has anyone else been in this situation what would I say?

I guess I can sat it's personal to everyone that asks but I kinda feel like that will make people automatically assume

"oh must be something to do with his penis.

Has anyone else been in this predicament and how did you avoid the conversion??

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Clars1003 profile image
Clars1003
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24 Replies
NIMan38 profile image
NIMan38

Hi Clars1003. Yes I have been there buddy. I had 4 weeks off, and it was my GP who got me the sick note. I just kept saying I had to have a operation and because of where it is at I am not showing you the scar! A rumour went round that I had a hernia repair! I was happy enough with them knowing that. After a couple of days it was never mentioned again.

I would also say - try not to be embarrassed! It is no one else's business only yours.

NIMan38 profile image
NIMan38 in reply toNIMan38

I should add though, that after a while, I became comfortable talking about it. And now, if anyone asks I just admit. It is no issue!

Ryanr profile image
Ryanr

hi,

I had the complete opposite pretty much everyone at work knew about it and a few of the lads including my boss at the time were all circumcised but mentioned it when they knew I was having it done I didn’t know before but it was funny as we realised we all had something in common.

It made me realise it’s a lot more common than you think. I bet there’s a few blokes and a few women with blokes in the office who are circumcised also.

I’m pretty much an open book though I didn’t see it as something to be ashamed of or embarrassed about it’s just one of those things.

Again you could always make something up if you don’t want to mention it but I personally found it easier to open upto people and tell them why? And I felt much better about it.

nomad3 profile image
nomad3

I am circumcised and I was spotted having a shower after a swim at a public pool and the details were relayed to the office where I worked. One female asked me if I was circumcised, and another said her husband has a small penis as well. Just brave it out and it will soon be forgotten.

Phuoc profile image
Phuoc in reply tonomad3

So... someone rattted you out that you have a small penis?

fredwgarfield profile image
fredwgarfield

Tell them it’s none of their business… and if you want to ease their mind, tell them “nothing for you to worry about. I’m doing fine.”

Mixer83 profile image
Mixer83

tell them you had a hernia operation, I was off work for two months recently, thats what I said

Lex559 profile image
Lex559

Well I mean those ur options. U can also lie. Lol. Tell them it's none of their biz or that u were on vacation. Butlegally their not supposed to ask especially if it's under ur 40 hr of protected leave, even hr. And hr shouldn't be blabbing that u changed from vacation to sick. If they do talk to a lawyer

I was in the same position I had mine done 5 weeks ago I took 2 weeks off work as holiday leave no questions asked I found it better that way 😊

roddythescot profile image
roddythescot

There is no reason to tell anyone except HR anything at all about the reason for your sick leave. HR only need to see the GP's sick note that will give away very little detail but may indicate a time in hospital.

If you feel that you need to tell your colleagues something but don't want to admit to it being circumcision then 'Hernia Repair' is close enough in location and healing time to get away with. Nobody is going to ask to see your scar!

However, if you are proud to now be a circumcised guy, or you just don't care, then why not tell them the truth? Being circumcised is nothing to be ashamed of. You may find out that a colleague you'd never have thought of as circumcised has had it done - possibly even as an adult too.

Clars1003 profile image
Clars1003

No it's not that I am ashamed or shy to be circumcised,

I am just embarrassed about the fact that I had to do it for medical reasons due to a tight foreskin, the phimosis is what I am embarrassed by

Once I say I got circumcised people may say why now - But I guess I could say because I chose to have it done

drew15401 profile image
drew15401

you really don’t even have to tell HR specifically what you’re having done. All you have to do is present a letter from your doctor saying you are under medical care and must be off work from —- to ——. Because of HIPPA they are NOT allowed to ask specific questions.

When I had my revision done, the insurance form just stated Surgical procedure—minor.

CombatEngineer profile image
CombatEngineer

I also used the hernia repair story when questioned by the curious (maybe they were just concerned) but later I mention to a colleague that I took the opportunity to have circumcision done during the same time in hospital. The word probably got around but no one asked any more questions.

roddythescot profile image
roddythescot in reply toCombatEngineer

Nice one! Two jobs in roughly the same area for the mental price of one!

uncutnine profile image
uncutnine

While I’ll keep my thoughts as to why you did this to /for your self . I will say that anyway questions while you were not at work they don’t have a choice didn’t even have that right you told them I went on and I had a procedure done that I needed to have done and I take my time mind yours the end of the day what you eat doesn’t make them shit do you have it might’ve been too harsh but that’s how I see it

renegade70 profile image
renegade70

male problems as opposed to the often-heard female problems. better yet, " kind of a personal problem".I would not be embarrassed it's 2023.

B9bby profile image
B9bby

When i was done, i got asked and told my boss heres the medical certificate, which says, medical reasons, thats all they need to know,

my best mate whom i work with knew something was up as i dont normally take time off, he asked to catch up for a beer out of the blew, and asked straight up whats wrong. I trusted him and told him, we then had a great chat about experiences and why etc .no one else knows apart from my best mate and girl friend

jaglad profile image
jaglad

I had mine a few years back and just told everyone. Thought no point trying to hide it, in fact when I got back lot's of sympathy was on offer.

You be fine. Don't worry about it.

keithy007 profile image
keithy007

It really has nothing to do with your HR or come to that matter your manager, it is entirely up to you as to wether you tell your Manager, but HR do not have any right to know, unless it is something major that could result in you having a long time off sick.

For some weird reason being circumcised in the UK is seen by far to many people to be taboo and that you must either be Jewish or Muslim to be circumcised. Do not be ashamed of your penis status, sometimes being circumcised is often the last resort. In time I am sure you will not be worried or embarrassed by this minor procedure. Best of luck for the future.

Your an adult, just say I’ve been circumcised and leave it at that.

Nudeglans profile image
Nudeglans

Just tell them you’ve been circumcised. It’s nothing to be embarrassed about. Everyone knows I’m circumcised.

NivviN profile image
NivviN

I had mine done at a private clinic on Saturday morning and was back at work on Monday so no problem like that here.

Clars1003 profile image
Clars1003 in reply toNivviN

That's great, how is your recovery process going?

NivviN profile image
NivviN in reply toClars1003

Recovery was very good. Has glue rather than stitches. No pain at all and was healed in 10 days. Had a good surgeon do the procedure.

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