Hi, I am brand new to the group and this is my first post. I am the mother of a 11-year-old who has had a medical condition called Encopresis. For years, I had no idea that this was even a condition. I thought that she was just being lazy and immature not making it to the restroom in time and having frequent bowel movements out of the blue, her pediatrician asked a question and I felt terrible. I spent so much time getting frustrated with her. I never really punished her, but she knew I was annoyed the end of this year her fifth grade year, we had to withdraw her from school and try homeschooling. She is in therapy and we are scheduled to see a psychiatrist in about a month but she has had school refusal since the first grade. I didn't even know what school refusal was. I have spent the entire summer educating myself. I am a single mother and I know as her primary parent and I am the one in charge of helping her get through this process her father feels that it's just a parenting issue and I have not been strict enough and does not except that she has any sort of "condition ". My support system is small. I'm basically on my own she is going to be repeating fifth grade starting in August and I am terrified because I know the struggle that is ahead of us. Homeschooling did not work. She refused to do anything she has a tutor but a tutor is not a teacher. I lost my job because I had to leave or stay home then ended up homeschooling. Does anyone have advice? I am exhausted! Her father tried to act like he was caring and concerned. Every time he said, send her work with me, she will do it. He always came up with an excuse as to why they didn't have time… Last time he had her, she actually did you some work. I needed him to work with her to see how difficult it really is all he did was give her the assignments and walk away. It wasn't until he started accusing me of being a bad parent. Did I go and actually check the work that she did. She obviously knew he wasn't checking her work behind her. She just had an almost every answer when I confronted him, absolutely no response he is now saying new year consequences are she's repeating the fifth grade. He will no longer help me pay for therapy or tutor, essentially firing her team that she needs so badly going into this school year I don't have the resources I don't know exactly where to turn some days I just cry and cry and cry and I suffer from post traumatic stress disorder, I am doing my best to put my game face on. I have done 105 hours of research I took a course on motivating students on Alison this summer. I still now that after the first day of school the panic is going to set in. It's truly heartbreaking to see her anxiety. I can feel it and she knows that I support her 100%. She is also very feisty and will fight me every step of the way. Anyone have some advice for me? All I want is a happy, healthy child, who is going to grow up to be strong and successful in whatever she does.
thank you in advance!
