Ran my long run of 5 miles today, even when it was dark and raining! But the battle started afterwards...

[Redcello41]

Just got back from a really great 5 mile long run this morning! I felt great and so focused all the way through my run, utilising all the tips that I had learnt from my last run with a running coach (I will share the tips on another post, don't worry!) with epic orchestral music playing in my ears! I even got rid of a stitch and I felt like I was running more efficiently and a bit faster than my usual pace. I completed the run in 1 hour and 15 minutes and even had enough energy to sprint the final meters and my overall average pace was 9"19/km! I finished the run really happy with my efforts and I even enjoyed running in the rain!

But when I got home about an hour ago it all went a bit downhill mentally - I can't help but feel a bit disappointed about how long it took me to complete the 5 miles and I feel like I am battling with myself now. The logical part of my brain is saying, you need to be more patient with yourself, you have just returned to running having just had a hospital health blip, the run is called a 'long slow run' for a reason, you were running up and down a lot of hills today, there is no such thing as too slow, your run was 5 minutes faster than the last 5 miles you ran before you got ill, you ran on your own and you can generally run faster when you are running with someone else or with a group, you shouldn't compare yourself to others, you ran with good form today, you are not defined by those numbers and so on, you get the gist. But there is this other voice saying things like, you need to be faster, it's going to take you ages to complete the Bath Half if you ran 5 miles (8K) in an 1hr and 15 mins today, some people can run 10K in 55 minutes or less but it took you much longer to run a shorter distance than 10K, you ran just over 7K in just under an hour on Thursday therefore you should have completed the 8K you did today in a quicker time, you need to get into a routine of strength training to get faster before the race, are you even going to be able to complete the Bath Half, dardy dardy da...

It was never about the finish line, it's the process that is more important but I feel like I'm in a mental battle now and feel a tad disheartened and frustrated (I am known for being very hard on myself in general!). It's funny how my run was not a battle at all (I really enjoyed it!) but now afterwards feels like I'm fighting with the different/conflicting voices in my head. Anyone else feel this way? How do you combat mental battles do to with running? Any tips or encouragement will be greatly appreciated.

[cheekychipmunks Half Marathon]

Aww Redcello, please please don’t be disheartened with yourself. You are strong - I’m not sure how strong I’d be coming back from all the blips you’ve had. And there’s nothing wrong with your time AT ALL! Don’t compare yourself to others. You said you felt the run went well and you had the ooomph to up your pace for the last bit! 💪

It was your run. Yours, no one else’s. You loved it, you felt great and you loved your music 🎶 (I’m not telling you what tosh I listen to on my runs, knowing you have a beautiful orchestra in your ears!!) 😅

And as for the Bath Half, you’ll smash it no matter what. 👊 Again, it’ll be your race. 🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️ I’m not quick at all, and I’ve embraced it. I love running for what it is. I can run. So can you. 😀

You’ve got this Redcello. Let’s go and smash Bath with our VRBs and a few thousand others in 4 weeks time! Let’s have FUN! ❤️👍

[Redcello41 Half Marathon in reply to cheekychipmunks]

Thanks for being so encouraging! Yes, comparison is the thief of joy which I need to be wary of hahaha! Yes, let's go and smash the Bath Half (not literally hahaha)!

[linda9389 Administrator Marathon]

Ahhh, how annoying. I HATE the head battles, but get them all the time. There will always be something my head wants to argue about. My last long run was pretty miserable - a large part of the run wasn't enjoyable and the battle in my head was raging. I ran slower than I want to run the actual race (as we're supposed to!) but was wrecked by the end. How will I get the sort of time I want if I ran that so much slower and had absolutely nothing left to give? So you're already one step ahead of me - you enjoyed your run 😍

I know race magic is a beautiful and powerful thing, and when I take control of my head, I do still believe I can have the run I want on 15th March and enjoy it.

Give yourself a break young lady! Enjoyment comes first and you're on top of that. This is your first HM so there is absolutely no time pressure on you. Enjoy and finish - those are your only two requirements here. Keep on doing what you're doing, with a smile and a pat on the back 👏👏👏

(oh, and I loved your playlist by the way)

[Redcello41 Half Marathon in reply to linda9389]

Thanks Linda! I shall enjoy and finish and not worry about times! I am way too hard on myself sometimes which isn't helpful for me hahaha! Looking forward to the 15th! This month is going to fly by!

Yay, I'm glad you liked the playlist!!! I was listening to it on my run this morning and it really powered me through! Plus it made me feel epic, running through the rain and wind too!

[Beachcomber66 Administrator Half Marathon]

Ok , you have had the nice responses 😊 Look at where you were, not long ago, with serious pains, hospital stuff, the works. Where you are now represents amazing progress; better than you could have expected or even hoped for. Success in this HM is turning up and completing it alongside lovely VRBs. The only high risk you face is trying to go too fast; taking it slowly is the low risk sensible option. I might one day do a 55 minute 10k, but never in the course of running a HM!! So focus on strength building distance and keep it slow. Your brain is having trouble recognising what amazing success looks like. 👍

[Redcello41 Half Marathon in reply to Beachcomber66]

Wow that really puts it into perspective! Yes, there was a time where I thought it wasn't going to be possible because of hospital stuff and health, but the fact that the doctor gave me to go ahead and that I am able to get back into training with a month to go is great! And you are right, I am not going to push myself and risk getting injured! I am going to go slow as you say and my goal is to just cross that blasted finish line! Me standing on the start line is a success in itself considering everything that has happened over the last three or four months!

[Beachcomber66 Administrator Half Marathon in reply to Redcello41]

Spot on!! 😊👍

[Redcello41 Half Marathon in reply to Beachcomber66]

[Granspeed]

I think you’ve written your own answer: your run was 5 minutes faster than the same distance before you got ill! 👏🏼🎉👏🏼 No wonder you felt it went well. You are making a good recovery and meeting your own goals on a sensible training plan. What’s not to like? Listen to all the reassurance from the experienced folk on here and carry on. Those gremlins can leave with Storm Dennis. None of us will miss them, for sure!

[Redcello41 Half Marathon in reply to Granspeed]

Thanks for your reassurance! I am just going to enjoy training and take in the atmosphere on the day!

[Decker Ultramarathon]

It’s not easy to silence that voice some days isn’t it? It seems to always be there, egging us on to steal our joy and have us miserably comparing our efforts to others or to times. It’s a lie of course. That, I think is the inner challenge of running. Its physical but even more so, mental. I have fallen into this trap so many times too. In the end, it’s what you can look back and own on your own terms that really matters. This is your journey. Everyone has their own personal measures of success, relative to their own obstacles and challenges. You are doing great! Please don’t forget that.

[Redcello41 Half Marathon in reply to Decker]

I always think that the mental side of running is harder than the actual physical side of running. One runner said to me that your mind will always give up before your body! And yes you are right, this is my journey and what a journey it's been so far! Going to relax and just enjoy the process and race day and stop putting extra pressure on myself. I am already successful just being able to get back into training and so I will be so chuffed when I cross that finish line!

[Decker Ultramarathon in reply to Redcello41]

Awesome! You’ll be great!

[Redcello41 Half Marathon in reply to Decker]

Thanks! 😃

[wyrdwolf]

I too have been battling naughty brain, it is so hard, especially when other people are constantly going on about how fast they are, it makes you want to quit 😓 But! I think the secret is to not give up and carry on anyway! 😄 My runs had been horrid the last few weeks because of knee pain, but the two I did on Friday/Saturday felt a lot better, still slow of course (I will always be slow!) but more fun, I have a race this Sunday so hoping race excitement will boost me a bit - races are fun so I hope it works for you too! 😄

[Redcello41 Half Marathon in reply to wyrdwolf]

Yes that's the whole reason why I got into running in the first place, the concept of endurance and never giving up! Thank you, you've just reminded me of that! Sorry to hear that you have had a few bad runs, they are never easy when they do strike. How did your race go by the way?

[wyrdwolf in reply to Redcello41]

The race is this weekend, fingers crossed for some non windy weather for a change as it is on the seafront! 😄

[Redcello41 Half Marathon in reply to wyrdwolf]

Oh oops, sorry! I must have got my days mixed up hahaha! Yes let's hope that there is little wind for your race! Let us know how it goes and good luck! 😃

[Windoze Half Marathon]

Mate the fact you are here writing about running 5 miles is awesome! Keep going. Keep working on stuff! Most of all enjoy your running. 😎😎🏃‍♂️🏃‍♂️🏃‍♂️🎉

[Redcello41 Half Marathon in reply to Windoze]

Yes very true, thank you! I've got an 11K run to do on Sunday and I've never run that far before!