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What a difference a year makes

This all started a year ago with a really painful knee and finger joints and then a surprise positive ANA. The fatigue and other symptoms had always been there in bouts for years but had been put down to anaemia and flu. Now my christmas tree is sitting in the garden for my husband to bring in where I would normally do it and as I am very picky about the decorations I always do that myself but this year I think I will have to ask for help as I am a bit stiff at the moment. I suppose I knew I had got quite a bit worse but recetly a few things have made me realise it and I don't like it.

I am a self confessed control freak and part of me is saying you can do it and another part is screaming be sensible I wonder which will win.

As you can tell I have not accepted this yet and don't even have a firm diagnosis either. I have an appointment on the 19th and I am hoping I get somewhere this time as my medication still does not have it under control.

This was meant to be an observation not a rant, sorry. Off to have my bath and consider whether I am going to be sensible or stupid lol.


5 Replies

Hi jonesy1

I know what you are going through I was the same not excepting what I have still don't to a certain extent. I am a bit of a control freak to.Most times I do what I want and may be I will suffer for it, but I feel it was worth it (my husband does'nt) I do give in sometimes after a bit of nagging from hubbie, and he is right (don't tell him I said that) This reply might not be much help, just to let you know we all know how you feel. Take Care Let your hubbie do the tree it might be funny. I let my kids ONCE. :)


Thank you for your reply it made me smile that you let your children do it ONCE but obviously not twice lol.

After chatting to my daughter on the phone earlier the tree had better still be in the garden tomorrow for her to do unless hubby does it tonight. I consider myself suitably told off lol.

As I was told I coouldn't do that I have been and tidied up the spare room for them to stay at christmas (I think the tree might have been easier!)

Thanks again

Sue x


Let us know how you get off on the 19th.

You are no alone we are all with you and understand

Love & Sunshine



Good luck for 19th!

My son (aged about 19 at the time) and his friend did the tree one year - it had silver baubles on one side and red on the other - it was great and it was fun!

I have found that you have to recognise that if you delegate things they may not get done exactly how you would have done them, but it's kind of other people to do things for you and it would be churlish to complain. Becoming more chilled about things is less stressful and less stress really helps lupus symptoms. (And I used to be known as Monica from Friends - complete control freak if you never watched it) Take care. x


Thank you for your comment and I bet your red and silver tree was fun.

I am getting better at accepting help and then not saying if it is not done exactly how I would have done it but it is a struggle, I even find myself trying to do some things before someone else because of this.

The tree is slowly getting decorated as nobody in my family is brave enough to volunteer to do this as they know how picky I am about it and I have realised I am happier doing it this way than having someone else do it. I have had help with the rest of the decorations.

When i read the bit about Monica from Friends it was a light bulb moment for me and like you I could probably give her a run for her money in some areas!

Take care x


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