My poor sister

[Miasgamgam]

Before my surgery 2 months in fact my 63 year old sister was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer.she had 3 rounds of chemo but they can't do anymore she's to week.I shaved her head and my daughter gave her a manicure ,geez she's fading so fast,can't walk anymore and she's sickley and very soft spoken now.mom died 7 months ago so as u can imagine I just feel like hell and almost guilty that I don't have cancer and she does.I'm so like a zombie and all I do is cry.there is no more hope and I'm a mess

[anrean]

Oh, Miasgamgam, you have been through so much recently. This evil disease has no regard for what happens and what it means to us. Please do not feel guilty - it is okay to celebrate your own success while coping with what your sister is going through. I remember how excited you were to not have cancer - please don't drag yourself through the pain of feeling guilty when you have no control over what happens. Love your sister as best you can, and try to enjoy the time that is left. She would not want you to feel guilty for being a survivor. No one gets to choose when this evil disease strikes, and we have very little control over what is going to happen. I am so very sorry you are in this position

God Bless all of you

Lauri-Anne

[FtB_Peggy in reply to anrean]

Oh my gosh, Miasgamgam, I am just so sorry. So sad. Please hear Lauri-Anne's wise words - she is absolutely right in all that she said. Your health is a gift, a wonderful thing, you get to embrace that, and your sister would want you to do that. Hold on tight to her, love her through this time, be in this moment - deal with tomorrow when it comes. You have been dealt many hard blows, please hold on to your loved ones and don't be shy about getting help through this time. Please know we are all holding you close in our thoughts.

[Miasgamgam in reply to FtB_Peggy]

Thank u so much.my sister passed away last week and the suffering is over though I miss her.my surgeon said I have healed so fast,its been about 51/2 weeks and I'm going back to work.I have learned something thru all of this life is short and precious and I will no longer live with toxic negative people.I was spared cancer and I will honor my mom and sister by being happy.I thank u all so much,it helps when strangers are kind just because they care.thank u

[FtB_Peggy in reply to Miasgamgam]

MIasgamgam, so many emotions coming at you, deep grief at losing the company of your sister, joy because of healing. You have a beautiful Spirit, and a very strong Soul. Stride forth with determination!

I am so very sorry for your loss.

[Denzie Moderator Volunteer]

My heart goes out to you and your family. You've been visited with too much grief and pain in recent months. Laurie-Ann has given you some good advice. So has Peggy. Please embrace it.

If your hospital offers a caregiver support group please consider attending. It will help you to know how others are coping.

If Health Unlocked has a pancreatic cancer board consider reaching out to other caregivers there as well.

If there is a Gilda's Club or Cancer Support Community in your area you might want to join the caregivers group there as well.

cancersupportcommunity.org/...