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[Noctstar]

I've not joined an anxiety community in about eight years or so. I've struggled with anxiety and depression my whole life. I recently decided to go back to school and since then things have gotten a bit better and in some ways a lot worse. School really gives me anxiety. Deadlines / homework especially. I've had recurring dreams of high school pressures and anxiety ever since my teens so I sometimes wonder why I'm even doing this. I get this very unhealthy mindset that i just can't allow myself to relax because there are simply things in the future that require my attention. It's pretty awful.

Ive also been having some physical trouble with my lower back and right leg. I'm going for an MRI but it definitely seems to all relate to my anxiety.

Long story short, things have been a bit tough lately and I thought I should reach out. My family helps out as much as they can but I try not to burden them too much.

Also something I've been struggling with lately: I sometimes get the feeling I should not own a pet. I love my two cats to death but ever since I adopted my first cat I've noticed that my anxiety levels had risen. He's a smart, lovable, but needy animal. He cries alot. Not as much as he had as a kitten but is overall the most noisy and needy cat I've ever known. I wrestle with the decision to give him and his buddy away. I simply think I would wound his heart or that his new owner would just get annoyed at him. I think all sorts of stuff, worst of all if he were hurt in any way. But I know I need at least a break from being a pet owner, I'm just unsure as to how to go about it.

Anyway, thanks to anyone who read this far. I've learned to use lots of different tools to help myself (breathing, meditation, exercise, yoga, etc) and while I wish I were more consistent, I have to say that these things really help. It's just become... harder, in ways that I never really expected. Difficult decisions and dealing with anxious situations I willingly place myself in.

Thanks again to anyone who's read all that and to anyone with feedback.

[sunandbutterfly]

Welcome and thank you for sharing. Many people deal with anxiety, especially school related. Know that you are not alone. Does your school have a mental health center? Some offer services to students. Or have you considered seeing a licensed counselor?

As far as the pets, have you considered a kennel or trying to talk to friends or family about taking them for a bit?

Sorry to hear of the health issues that you have been having as well. Follow through with your testing the best you can and let the staff know if you are overly anxious about the MRI. My grandma needed a dose of medication to help her get through the last MRI.

Keep on trying your coping strategies. Would be willing to point you to some additional resources if needed.

[lillyofthevalley37]

There is an anxiety support community too here on HU you could post this there as well

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[Bradley0210]

Noctstar thanks for sharing. You remind me of myself so much. Having a puppy at home can be very stressful. He is very high energy and requires A LOT of excercise. I remember having a very tough time in high school and thinking my whole life that I had been through the worst of it. But now at 24 it has been harder than ever. Never thought that this was gonna happen. Keep reaching out. Keep talking about your issues. Sometimes you have to let the cat suffer so you can spend time on yourself. That’s tough to do but you are the priority. Message me if you want.