Lost and lonely

[RacerT]

I realize that I see the glass half empty. I always think the worst of any and most situations.. I don't think I was always this way. I eventually became this way because of the people around me and my life experiences growing up. Nevertheless, I really struggle with my thoughts. Sometimes, my thoughts are so obessive to the point I feel as though they are being put in my mind by something else. Every little pain, pressure, tightness, tingling, stiffness, bulging, anything, anything at all, I think something is wrong. But is there something really wrong with me? I also drive away family and friends with accusations that aren't true and I'm sorry for it but can't help it. I have said I'm sorry but that doesn't seem to be enough what can I do to rebuild relationships

[Hidden]

Hello again

When we are growing up our life experiences can and do affect us as we get older which from what you have said is what has happened to you so first you need to stop punishing yourself for the way you are , we learn to keep a guard up , push people away but it is a habit we get into as we are just trying to protect ourselves and save ourselves from what we have always seem to know which is pain

We do however need to start to change this as we can start to push the wrong people away and that gives us pain to , I know easier said than done but taking small steps can be a good start

You have said you are sorry and in lot's of cases this should be enough but I think I have said in my last reply maybe choose one or two of the people you are missing in your life and sit and write them a letter , be honest about how you feel ,how life has affected you , how you struggle and react and ask in time ( maybe not now ) but would there think about getting to know the real you because you miss them so much and having them back in your life could be a huge step in helping you to get back on track

If after you have written something like that they still do not come round then as hard as it feels you may have to accept these people are no longer going to be in your life but concentrate on those that are like your partner and Daughters

When we are low and anxious we become very negative and we do start to believe everything we feel has to be something bad this is quite normal again the only way to change this is when we get negative thoughts remember that is the anxiety speaking and change those negative thoughts for positive one's so if you feel a pain and the anxiety says , " O this is it this time " change that thought to

" No nothing is wrong except anxiety is trying to take over , been here before and nothing bad happened "

Tell yourself enough times and eventually the positive thoughts will outweigh the negative ones

Take Care x