I have been dealing with anxiety and panic for the past 3 years. I was on meds for about 2 years of that time but did so well and was not experiencing any anxiety that my doctor weaned me off the meds and I finally thought I was my normal self again. That was a year ago, since then my dad passed away and it has affected me so badly that the anxiety is back and even worse then before. I don't want to get back on meds but I feel like I'm losing my mind. I am having heart pains, constant depersonalisation and even went to my doctor to do a EKG which came back clear yet I'm convinced there is something seriously wrong with me. Incidentally my dad passed away from heart complications. My thoughts are constantly about the most negative, horrible things and I just can't seem to stop myself. On Christmas day i was terrified to have a glass of wine with my family because i am convinced that it will affect me in some bad way. i havent drank since i started experiencing anxiety 3 years ago but surely it should not terrify me to have a glass of wine. Please help.