Kidding themselves?

I have lost 26 lbs now but it has been a battle, lots of saying "no thank you" to cakes, biscuits, crisps and counting my calories plus taking up exercise. There are lots of people I know who say they eat healthily but need to lose large amounts of weight and they have medical conditions such as high blood pressure, dodgy knees etc. But every time there are biscuits and sweets about, they grab some, I see them coming from the shop with donuts and they look guilty.

Why do people try to say they are making healthy choices when clearly they are not and with so many impacts on their health, multiple visits to the Doctor,mother keep munching. Maybe I am jealous or food is an addiction many of us suffer with. What do u think? Frustrated.

11 Replies

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  • Well done you keep at it Joolie! You will glad you stayed strong, you will definitely feel great in yourself!

    People say they are being good but still eat bad things, maybe you saw them on a treat day lol. My daughter is on a diet and lost half a stone in a week it is doing her good, we all eat some of her recipe's from slimming world they are lovely.

    I really believe sugar is an addiction and when you cut down gradually you find that those 'naughty 'foods don't have such an appeal as they used to.

    Good luck and keep it going.

  • I have given up crisps, chocolate, cake and reduced bread and track all my calories. It's heartbreaking to see people harming themselves and gaining weight when they have health issues already. I'm 52 and want to be mobile and healthy.

  • Amelia could be right, could be a treat day. Or, they could have a sugar addiction. There can be many complicated emotional factors involved with over-eating. I have lost count of the amount of folk who know exactly what they are doing wrong when it comes to their diet and yet, they cannot stop doing it. I have been one of them, and am very aware that I am not out of the woods yet, it's very early days. Although I've lost 32 pounds since early September, I nearly had a wobble the other night when my pain was getting the better of me. I wasn't hungry, yet my first instinct was to turn to food even though I knew it would be bad for me. Old habits die hard I guess, and this one was formed over and maintained for lots of years - far too many years. Luckily I got through it, with a good deal of help from the folk on the weight loss forum - this time. Food is a coping mechanism for some people, just like some people light up a cigarette when stressed, or drink a bottle of vodka, or take drugs. The biggest problem people who struggle with food have is that they cannot eliminate ALL food from their life as one can with the other addictions I mentioned, because everybody needs to eat to stay alive. There have been times in the past when it really wouldn't have mattered WHAT food it was I turned to, anything would have done, it was just a coping mechanism.

    I suppose what I'm trying to say is, you need to have a deep understanding of each individual to know what caused the overeating in the first place. When they told you they were eating healthily, that may well have been true at the time they said it to you. Then, just like an alcoholic, for example, the person may have "fallen off the wagon" that day, for whatever reason. They may be embarrassed to admit it and feel guilty - I remember reading somewhere about people who have food issues feeling the need to hide what they are doing. Sounds quite similar to other addictions/coping mechanisms doesn't it? Guilt and feeling bad about an episode of "falling off the wagon" can actually perpetuate more of the same behaviour to cope with the stress of it. Strange but true. "I'm no good at this, I've failed again, I might as well give in, here pass the doughnuts because eating's what I do when I'm stressed". Perhaps if you can see it from that perspective, you may be a little more forgiving and not get quite so frustrated about it?

  • So many of us are eating all for the wrong reasons and yet there is little education or help around to help us. Unless u join an expensive diet group and they don't seem to have the long term answers either, food is everywhere. As soon as I have one chocolate biscuit, I want the whole packet

  • I agree. There seems to be help available for other "addictions" that people use to numb their emotional pain, yet overweight people are viewed as lazy people who need to get off their fat behinds and exercise, and eat less. Sounds simple but it isn't! I don't know any people who actually WANT to be overweight - all I see is that it causes them utter misery. I know one person who won't even go out because they are ashamed of their size. It's so glaringly obvious that something is going on psychologically. Shaming and guilt tripping overweight people is only likely to compel them to eat even more. You are right, there needs to be far more awareness and education when it comes to food issues. Anorexia and bulimia are supported, over-eating should receive support too. After all, it causes health problems, so it costs the NHS money, and will likely lead to premature death. I really don't think it's taken seriously enough. Maybe if we could address the issues causing the over-eating early enough, it would save the NHS money in the long run.

  • I am convinced that we become addicted to those endorphins we get from the sweet comfort foods. We crave sugar and starch when stressed, tired or depressed. It is no different from the alcoholic who reaches for the bottle for that immediate and short term relief. Don't beat yourself up for those occasional lapses - praise yourself for the more frequent (hopefully) occasions when common sense and self-control encourage you to make the sensible choices. Looking back, I regret having wasted time feeling depressed in my 20's carrying that one extra stone - what I would give to be down to that weight now! I have to tell myself to keep positive, active, looking outwards. As they say - the rest of your life starts now.....

  • Yes, I agree. I don't think I've ever heard of anyone finding comfort in a stick of celery, it always seems to be those "bad" foods!

    And it's such a shame that we can't talk to our younger selves and tell them how great (and lucky) they are and to make the most of it right away! I have similar feelings to you..."wasted time" springs to mind. Can't dwell on it though, you're right, just got to keep trying to look forwards and counting blessings as much as the mind will allow. I'm a warrior, I do battle with various things on a daily basis and it's my intention to win the War, even though I may lose the odd battle here and there along the way! Charrrrrrge! :-D

  • Me! I love celery it's the crunch! I often nibble celery or carrot if they're being chopped for dinner! Because I love crunchy foods, I'm not displacing other naughtier foods with them. The thing that worries me is that there are opportunities to eat and drink everywhere. We never snacked in the fifties. We waited hungry for the next meal or ate enough at the last one to see us through. Food was more expensive in that it cost a higher percentage of our income so it wasn't lying around and we couldn't afford to snack endlessly. Now there are hot food shops with their smells and their pictures everywhere. If we hide away from them there is food in every advert on the TV. M&S's adverts are like food porn! Because we were hunters and gatherers when our bodies developed we are programmed to graze and nibble and to react to eating opportunities by eating. The only way I have found round this is to avoid temptation at every opportunity. I give in when I'm tempted so my only tactic is to avoid being tempted. I do this by not buying the foods I shouldn't have except for planned treats and yes, they call to me. So sometimes I can't plan or have them in the house. I also make sure that I make time to have meals that work for me because I found that when I am full I don't get triggered by the pictures or smells. And by keeping a food diary, I have learned what works and what doesn't. It's a constant work in progress. I am trying to lose my Christmas weight to get back to goal. And last week put on 2 lbs. So it is a project that will never be finished. But there are days and weeks when it works. So onwards and downwards. Hope JulieB has found her mojo and is feeling more positive after the last 10 days.

  • Hooray, I found one - I've never come across a person who actually enjoys celery before, hooray, hooray! I'm actually pleased for you and a little bit envious lol, I wish I could enjoy it but it actually makes me screw my face up in disgust! It's like an inbuilt reflex action to want to spit it out. I get that with prawns too, I have tried and I just cannot turn them in my mouth. That said, at least there are plenty of other healthier things I do eat.

    I agree about avoiding food outlets etc and I don't watch tv during the day, as I tend to listen to music to lift my mood, but the adverts - oh deary me! The worst thing about "bad" foods, I will call them, because basically they are bad for you and we all know it lol, is that hubby always buys exactly what he wants and there will always be something "bad" in the house. So I have to try to conquer my demons the majority of the time. I'm doing pretty well on sticking to my "eating plan for life". However, I am really finding that pain is the major trigger for me wanting to comfort eat. I think this is the most attention I have ever paid to what is actually going on with me, I mean REALLY going on with me emotionally. I have a little anxiety about how well I will succeed long term but the day to day approach works better, so I'm trying to just get through each day and hope the good days eventually outweigh the bad days...so far it seems to be the case thank goodness! I too keep a food diary and, although I've lost my Christmas weight now, I stuck last week and this week seems slow, hoping for a loss for Monday's weigh in. At least I didn't feel like comfort eating when I didn't lose last week, I keep going over what a daft response it would be to not losing weight. Now if I can just manage to drill that into my head and find another way to react when pain gets the better of me I'll be on the road to success I think!

    Hope you are having a great weekend, onwards and downwards! :-)

  • The trick is to have overweight family members who say they want to lose too! That means they eat all treats out of a paper bag on the way home so I can't judge! I wouldn't judge. But they enjoy cheating and feeling guilty. The other problem about living in a slimming house is if one of you feels like a treat it tends to trigger you all. Can you get him to agree to keep the naughtiest where you wouldn't find them? Or have your own good treats. Perhaps a more luxurious type of fruit? I found the grapes and persimmon (aka Sharon fruit) I had last week saved me from the choc biscs X 5 but not the sixth! Still if we get our eating 80% right, that should be good enough.

  • Everyone has different problems, mine is that I live alone and I've nobody to watch me! Last night I had a bottle of wine, a shot of brandy and 100g sweet biscuits (half a packet) for no reason at all. I even ate the biscuits in bed, which I hate to do. At five o'clock this morning I got my punishment - dreadful GORD (reflux) which I knew would happen even as I was eating the damn things. Sometimes I despair of ever getting the better of these mad moments.

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