Um, idk where to start. I was diagnosed with PTSD recently, apparently i have had it for a while. I have been researching it and researching it, b/c i want to know all about it so I can help myself, but i dunno where to begin.
So what's your PTSD like?
Hi -it’s great you are researching -I don’t have a lot to say on this for now personally-I was never diagnosed as having it but in past I’m pretty sure I had this several times- from traumatic events as a child! Have you looked into emdr I think it’s called a therapy for ptsd? I’m just curious also if it’s helped a lot of others a lot ?? Oh and also cognitive therapy is another treatment for this as well! Gr8 you’re posting here as well👏🏼👏🏼☺️🌻
yeah, so i've been in emdr before. I'm gonna start doing dbt soon because my safety team thinks that that will be the most helpful to me.
I’m sorry to hear you’ve been diagnosed.
My ptsd presents itself with anxiety, panic attacks, isolation and agoraphobia. I find the world overwhelming and have cocooned myself for a few years now avoiding a lot of life.
if it isn't too personal can I ask what all of that stems from?
I had a difficult childhood full of stress with disfunctional immature parents.
My siblings were violent and aggressive, I was the scapegoat and had a mother who never defended me. My brother assaulted my husband physically in 2011, then me in 2012’. He had been abusing his partner and children too. My mum and sisters hounded me asnpolice were involved in the assault and they cut me off for not forgiving me but hurled abuse at me for 2 years first. I then developed anxiety, agoraphobia and ptsd. Which all stressed my body and I ended up with CFS/ME and some other health issues. Which flared the anxiety even more.
I’m now in the process of healing and trying to recover years of stress and the damage it’s done to my mind and body x
I'm very sorry you have been diagnosed with PTSD, WiltedFlower.
Finding a specialized trauma therapist can make a big difference. There is a lot of work involved but can help reduce your symptoms a lot.
Every person is unique and experiences PTSD differently.
I hope you can find the right therapist soon...
yes, I have a safety team that is greatly supportive of me and they are setting me up with dbt to help me out.
Hi WiltedFlower,
Well, you've come to the right place. 
Welcome to our lovely, friendly and supportive community.
Your username is very similar to what mine nearly was. I considered calling myself wiltedwallflower but in the end didn't (I called myself wanderingwallflower before changing my username to my current one recently, which you can do twice).
I want you to know that, although that's how you feel and that's totally valid, I don't see you as wilted.
I see you as a fluid individual, somewhere along in their journey, capable of change and growth. I hope one day soon you'll feel you're starting to blossom instead. Indeed, in PTSD recovery it's possible to achieve post traumatic growth.
How to describe PTSD? That's a tricky one. There's the medical definition, of course, and then there's how it feels for each individual person, which is going to vary widely due to a person's background, beliefs, and the person's individual trauma(s).
Flashbacks are quite common in PTSD, but they aren't as clear cut as people commonly believe, so people may not be able to recognise they're experiencing a flashback based on the rigid understanding of what they perceive a flashback to be, which is frequently understood as having to relive the whole traumatic event, as if it's happening again.
Of course, reliving the whole event can and does happen, but people can also experience partial flashbacks, such as re-experiencing the emotions around the trauma (emotional flashbacks), or the physical sensations associated with it (body memories or somatic flashbacks). I get a lot of emotional flashbacks although, with therapy, it's getting easier.
It's possible to get emotional flashbacks and not recognise them for what they are. There may be a trigger in our environment that we're not even aware of, so strong emotions may seem to come out of nowhere, which can be scary if we don't understand why or what's happening.
It's common for people with PTSD to be in a frequent state of arousal and hypervigilance, continually on the look out for threat or danger, because the person's mind hasn't processed the trauma and established, at a deeper level, that they're safe now. This can take the form of fight, flight, or freeze. It can be very exhausting to live with and can interfere with nuanced, higher order functioning. It can make managing life stress very difficult because the little bit of adrenaline we need to nudge us to deal with anything stressful is already ramped up too high, and not sustainable to experience over a long period of time.
When the mind is overwhelmed and no longer able to cope, it's common for it go into a state of dissociation. This can take the form feeling like one's surroundings aren't real (derealization), feeling like we aren't real (depersonalization), to a more general state of dissociation of just feeling detached and not present, zoning out, or going passive. I tend to experience quite a lot of general dissociation.
I think I've just about covered the main points. I hope this has given you some more clarity. There are lots of great resources on here that explain different aspects of PTSD and tips for managing it and recovery.
I want to wish you the very best.
Xx
thank you, that was very helpful. you're really informative and super sweet, i really admire that. Xx <3
Your welcome WiltedFlower and thankyou 😊 that's very kind of you to say so. Look forward to bumping into you in the community. 🌷 xx
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