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Late night trip to a&e (!!!!!!)

I'm still really struggling and last night confusion clouded over me and made me something dangerous last night I swallowed a message tablet (for thrush) and went about my evening as normal when the confusion cloud cleared (5 hours later!!) I thought it would be good to read the pamphlet and realise I had swallowed the plastic thing that was meant to go in the other end of me and went to a& e and broke down in tears for being do stupid I told both my mum and uncle and my uncle came and sat with me I had a microthing painfully shoved up my nose and down my throat and they saw nothing then I had xray and that showed nothing and they said what I swallowed wasn't going to hurt me it just scratched my throat so got sent home and got in at 2 am told my manager I was was going to be late in as I spend part of the night in a &e and my chest has gotten wider so I've gone in 4 months from a 32c to a 38E(!) anyway I feel like I'm.getting worse but I'm lucky I have next week off I'm spending Xmas on my own as every around me has bailed (and I have a mold issue in my bathroom that the landlord needs to see) but I'm really worried if I do something worse than trying to choke myself can I put any safety measures in place as I will be on my own next week until I see the hospital at the start of Jan (I have an a4 list of growing issues) or how do I deal with my injury for the first time in 17 years?

It's not a good start to my 30's

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Oh Bexx I'm so sorry to see how wound up & confused you are. I saw the same sort of behaviour yesterday in myself. I'm normally fairly organised, but yesterday almost had a meltdown as a result of mislaying & forgetting stuff.

It was all about my brain trying to process too far ahead whilst losing sight of what was happening in the moment. But after giving myself a good talking-to (plus a cuppa) I vowed to remember to slow right down and concentrate on the here and now.

It takes discipline and commitment, especially when busy, but if you can think 'STOP..........SLOW DOWN' whenever you feel you're getting ahead of yourself you should be more focused, and less likely to make unfortunate mistakes.

I hope your feeling of self-recrimination will soon be a distant memory..........and no harm done ! 😖 x

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I get brain fog often. I try to do something to make me remember when I took my pain pill. I need to start a paper with time and date and put it beside my meds.

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With my frequent medication I'm fine as its routine but this wasn't since I all this started 5 months ago work has been exhausting as it takes me ages to do stuff n my manager has criticized me do poor performance twice an it was until I explained look my brain is do I g funny things and I have an appointment with the hops that he has backed off he should be grateful I'm coming In so after work I spent most evening sleeping zumba is a nightmare as my brain refuses to keep up pace and my phone and kindle have been frustrating pieces of equipment when it comes to text as I'm having difficulty using the touch screen to the point where I got a Nokia but that became announcing/frustrating pressing numbers several times to get one letter (how did we cope lol) so I am trying to think of work around but I've had no luck so far and I need to listen to spin to win wheel of fortune tune as its going round in a loop (can't ya tell I grew up in the 90`s) and I didn't go out last night as Bristol City vs Man U were playing (wooo we won 2-1) so the part of Bristol I live in (Bedminster) would have been rammed to give you a idea of how close I live to Ashton Gate I can see the stadium from the bottom of my road and all I have to do it open the window to hear the crowd roar there was times in making running my craft group a nightmare and Ive realised I split my trousers in the seam in an unfortunate place (and when you work in a office full of guys no doubt they will look) so need to go back into down (which isn't hard as I work pretty munch in the centre (https://www.bristol.gov.uk/en_US/web/city-hall) but its just a pain as I spent my lunch in town yesterday getting things and Ive become sensitive to noise and light (I spent yesterday with my head under the quilt and for the past few weeks have had to run off to the toilet to get away from the annoying sound of the hoover and the street sweeper outside)

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I really feel for you Bex... i feel more brain fogged in the last week and i've been planning for Christmas since September. I am totally organised and ready for it and have a massive to do list which i have been methodically working through and crossing things off with dates at the side when i did them.

I personally feel it's just the general run up to Christmas which is giving me the brain fog.... colleagues and me wearing Christmas jumpers and a def holiday mood in the office at work. More traffic on the road, i work near a busy shopping centre. Fortunately i'm now done.,,,, i work part time and had sense to book tomorrow off.

So please don't be hard on yourself... sending you a hug!

Rachel x

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thanks my office has just gotten busy with empty desks and my hands are now cramping ...

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I keep doing similar things, like forgetting that Ive left a pan of boiling water on the cooker, not being able to remember if Ive taken the low dose aspirin etc.

Sounds like you have a lot to deal with and with all that stress are bound to make a few mistakes. Anyone would. I keep beating myself up for the mistakes i make and that just makes me more stressed and so more mistake prone.

You are holding down your job, dealing with your BI, getting on with things. Maybe you can forgive yourself the occassional mistake. Sounds like no harm done.

R

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thanks I have to tell myself its okay for me to cry and admit Im having a hard time and have alone time time

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