Hit a wall!: Hi folks - I've been managing ok over... - Headway

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Hit a wall!

trelfy1 profile image
16 Replies

Hi folks - I've been managing ok over the last few months really but all of a sudden I seem to have hit a wall with my recovery. My temper of late is really short and my poor wife and daughter are taking the brunt of it. I get anxious over the smallest of tasks that I know I can do and my memory doesn't seem to be getting any better. How do other people cope with brain injury problems? Should I chat to my doctor?

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trelfy1 profile image
trelfy1
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16 Replies

Hi Trelfy

i hit complete melt down and dissolve into tears under the slightest bit of pressure too. I hate it, one of the hardest 'effects' to live with.

I will be discussing it when I see neuro-psychologist in a few weeks. Might be worth talking to your GP and maybe getting a referral?

I find if I can remove myself from the situation that helps, a few minutes of slow breathing etc. But life doesn't always give you a few minutes space!

Good luck

cat3 profile image
cat3

I'd try anything which could improve my quality of life so see your GP Trelfy and tell him you need help.

I suppose the two main options are psychotherapy or medication (or both).

I know a few members here have had anger issues and opted for Anger Management courses after reaching the end of their tether, and realising also how badly it's affecting loved ones.

There's nothing to lose & you might just get the help that's needed.

I don't know how you feel about meds but, personally, I'd be in a mess without them.

Good luck & hope you find a way through all this. Cat x

Recovery will plateaux and you'll feel like you're stuck that way then one day you'll notice you're not running out of energy as much and you've recovered a bit more.

Try pacing your day, scheduling in relaxing, meditation and talking to friends. Stay happy and healthy and you'll get through.

trelfy1 profile image
trelfy1

Thanks everyone / I will book an appoint with my gp today.

jimboriley52 profile image
jimboriley52

When I go through episodes like this I have self taught myself to just ignore it and it usually does the trick. Mind you since my illness I don't really get that angry anymore. Prior to the such little things used to wind me up. So I suppose that my illness was a blessing in disguise. But other things like the memory loss and confusion says no

trelfy1 profile image
trelfy1

Booked an appointment with my gp, but they can't fit me in til next Friday!

Matt2584 profile image
Matt2584

Hi Trelfy,

I don't seem to lose my rag so much but i know what you mean about getting anxious over the smallest of tasks.

Years ago I was a proper hermit and I mean PROPER. Ilost loads of confidence and was not independent in the slightest. I got anxious over menial things and slightly bigger things like going out. Then once I had done that thing, I found there was nothing to worry about and I hated that part of me that would do that. I joined Headway, confidence and independence is on the rise, I get out a bit more, I don't get so anxious now, not with the small things anyway. But larger things I need to work up to. I can see myself doing these large tasks but I feel awkward doing it all by myself. In time, things may change.

Take care,

MJ

Bards profile image
Bards

Possibly you are, whether consciously or unconsciously, started to process more info now and it's all a bit of chronic overload happening. Recognising the issue, seeking advice here and making Dr's app = beingstatic.dailystrength.org/gr... out of concern for family. I salute you!

'Two steps forward, one step back' is how things generally roll(ed) for me - it's the only way I progressed. Just use as many Coping Strategies as you need to cushion things for you and yours.

I'm a nuts and bolts person, but whether this phase is reflecting a full revolution of that Wheel of Recovery thing might be what a neuropsch would explore. If unfamiliar, I'll try to link to an image... Hmmm, the link seems to have embedded up there. Hey ho...

Above all, don't beat yourself up - that just takes up much needed brain energy best saved for progress. I spent a good couple of years shooting myself in that foot to the frustration of many!

Bards

Sem2011 profile image
Sem2011

I can identify with what your experiencing and advice and strategies from my neuropsychologist saved me. I was rock bottom 18 months ago and could not see a light at the end of the tunnel . The right antidepressants helped me too. At first I refused the idea but, neuropsychologist explained brain injuries upset the serotonin level of the brain, almost it's has been shaken up like a snow globe, and assists my heightened emotions. My partner received the end of my temper /outbursts, I would feel awful afterwards and apologised profusely. It was very emotionally draining for both of us. Live does improve with correct input.

Good luck and take care

miracleman profile image
miracleman

Accept what you are saying about the plateau in your recovery! but as a few have said, view it as merely a rest; a chance to re-charge your batteries. Seek out advise; preferably a professional who has REAL understanding of acquired BI, (might not be the GP, but hopefully they can point you in the right direction.)

I can only give my own recovery as an example. A live threatening TBI in 2008, it has had many subsequent consequences, erratic mood swings, depression, family/relationship problems, etc! Though I have occasionally thought my recovery had plateaued, 6 years and 10 months on, I have continued to recover. Recovery must be balanced against my increasing age. At 51 it might be reasonable to expect my memory to falter, but it continues to amaze my wife and close friends! Though people who are aware of TBI do take it into consideration, and there are embarrassing exceptions; I still have difficulty with peoples names!

I was told by a Consultant Psychologist 5 months post accident, that any recovery I managed by 18 months, was likely to be the extent of my recovery!!!!!! B*ll S**T. Should be ashamed of himself. Fortunately I am a stubborn barsteward, and despite being anxious after 15 months, thinking, 'IS THIS IT?' He has been the spur in much that I have done since. If ever I see him I will thank him, (can't remember his name) then tell him how lucky he is. It could have been such a different outcome, had I not been a determined individual. His observation could easily lead to me succumbing to the depression and negativity that has haunted me post accident. Rather irresponsible of him IMHO.

My recover continues, yes it may well have slowed down, but I don't think it has 'flat lined'! Acquaintances and former colleagues who have not seen me for a long time, often comment about how much my mood, speech, self-confidence, appear to have improved. :)

'Keep on keeping on!' ;)

aqua4 profile image
aqua4

Hi Trelfy, I can't add any more, the others put so well. Hope you find the strategies you need.

This site has really made a big difference to my outlook.

Take care.K

ZEBLET17 profile image
ZEBLET17

I HAVE BEEN DOING THE HOUSE UP & WHAT I'VE DONE LOOKS LOVELY. THEN ABOUT A MONTH AGO I HIT THE WALL

HAVE NO INTEREST IN ANYTHING, DON'T CARE ABOUT ANYTHING, CAN'T EVEN BE BOTHERED TO DO THINGS THAT REALLY NEED DOING LIKE RETURNING A £300 PAIR OF EARRINGS. SO I LOSE THE MONEY, SO WHAT. THETHIBG THE 'FRIEND' DID THAT SO DEVASTED ME HAS REALLY KNOCKED MEOFF MY PERCH.

I CAN'T EVEN TELL PEOPLE JUST HOW BAD SOMETHING ID ID RECENTLY REALLY WAS. .

GP IS USELESS AT THIS & WOULD REFER ME TO A PSYCH WHICH I'VE DONE BEFORE & FOUND IT TO BE ONE OF THE MOST DAMAGING THINGS I'VE EVER DONE.

I KNOW THE AFTER EFFECTS OF MY BI WILL NEVER CHANGE (NEURO CONFIRMED THAT TOO) BUT THE THOUGHT OF BEING LIKE THIS FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE IS SOMETIMES TOO HARD TO BEAR,ESCPEIALY THE HEAD PAIN.

WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT? I HAVE NO IDEA. I DON'T NEED PLATITUDES LIKE YOU'LL FELL BETTER SOMETIMES. I NEED ACCEPTANCE FROM OTHERS THAT THIS IS WHAT IM'LIKE.

WHAT A MESS.

.

miracleman profile image
miracleman in reply to ZEBLET17

Hi Zeblet 17, I won't attempt platitudes or 'It will all be alright in the end/soon' Bullshine!

All I can hope is that you find some solace from somewhere. It will come from 'within' I suspect, as anything that others say, is likely to have a negative effect. ALL THE BEST.

I doubt it will be of any comfort to you, but many of the people who come on here have some understanding of where you are at the moment; I certainly do! and my thoughts and hopes are with you. Neal! :)

GuyM profile image
GuyM in reply to ZEBLET17

Hello

This is as honest a post as I've ever seen. We have to put on a brave face because that's what's expected - and people just want us to shut up sometimes. There is no easy solution: I remember how six months after my BI I got a cold: I thought, when this cold is gone, I'll be better. When the cold went, I was so disappointed that it just meant I didn't have a blocked up nose - the pain and the confusion was still there. But...here you are not alone; I'm rooting for you and I know many others are too. Good luck.

Kady profile image
Kady

Take life as slowly and easily as you can. In the end, the turtle wins the race. :-)

Meditation and yoga can help. Exercising the mind is as important as exercising the body. With other forms of exercise, do whatever you can without causing more aching in your head. When you can, please talk with at least one doctor about what exercises can help or hurt you.

Physical exertion can help the mind and body to heal, but remember to be wise.

Research what foods can help you as much as possible. Avacados, tomatoes and-if you're not vegetarian or vegan-fish are great. :-D Supplements can be helpful when they're needed.

Please do the best you can for yourself and be careful while you live the best days possible.

Everything has its fluctuations. We must learn what we need to do in order to adapt.

I wish you well. <3

To everyone else, good luck with all you face. May we all find some peace together and in our own world in the universe of perceptions. <3

trelfy1 profile image
trelfy1

Thanks again for all your replies, I find that this forum helps a lot

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