Head trauma over 39 years

At the age of 7 I had a bang to my head and lost my eye sight, at the age of 13 I was beaten by around 12 youths and my head was used as a football and I suffered some fits a little while after, at 15 I suffered concision playing rugby, at 18 I was beaten unconscious by bouncers, at 19 I was beaten around the head unconscious with metal bars, the same year I was hit over the head with a glass bottle, at 20 I was stabbed in the back of the head with a bayonet and drifted in and out of consciousness. And then more concussion and bangs to the head. And yet I am just depressed and angry

Any thoughts ???

17 Replies

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  • OH MY GOD THIS IS THE WORST STORY I HAVE EVER HEARD. MAKES MY BRAIN BLEED SEEM LIKE A CUT ON MY FINGER.

    YOU ARE COMPLETELY 100% JUSTIFIED IN FEELING LIKE YOU DO.YOU MUST BE A VERY BRAVE PERSON TO HAVE COPED WITH SO MUCH SO YOUNG, I AM FULL OF ADMIRATION FOR YOU.

    MY DEPRESSION & ANXIETY FOLLOWING THEBI HAVE BEEN HANDLED BY MY NEURO WHO, AFTER MANY DISCUSSIONS HAS PRESCRIBED AN ANTI-DEPRESSANT THAT REALLY WORKS, REDUCING THE ANXIETY BY ABOUT 30%. I DON'T CARE THAT IT IS AN ANTI-DEPRESSANT, IT WORKS I'LL TAKE IT. HAVE YOU DISCUSSED YOUR ISSUES WITH .YOUR NEURO OR A NUROPSYCHOLOGIST?

    IN MY EXPERIENCE THE GP ISN'T QUALIFIED TO DEAL WITH BRAIN INJURY SO NEURO PROFFESSIONALS ARE THE PEOPLE TO SPEAK TO.

    YOU HAVEN'T SAID WHAT YOUR OTHER DEFIEIENCIES ARE, IF YOU'D LIKE TO SHARE THEM THERE WILL BEPEOPLE ON THIS FORUM WHO WILL UNDERSTAND & EMPATHISE. THERE IS NO JUDGEMENT ON THIS FORUM, WE HAVE ALL SUFFERED BRAIN TRAUMA OF SOME SORT OR ANOTHER & KNOWWHAT IT ACTUALLY FEELS LIKE.

    THIS IS A PLACETO TO SPEAK YOU MIND & FEEL COMPLETELY SECURE & SUPPORTED.I HAD MY INJURY 16 YRS AGO &FOUND THISSITE FAIRLY RECENTLY BY ACCIDENT. IT HAS BEEN A REAL LIFESAVER FOR ME, , I WISH I'DFOUND IT EARLIER.

    SO WELCOME & SHARE AS MUCH OF YOUR STORY AS YOU WANT.

    SORRY ABOUT TYPING IN CAPS, MY EYESIGHT IS NOW TOO RUBBISH TO BE ABLE TO READ LOWER CASE WELL!

    TAKE GREAT CARE.

  • Your entitled to feel what you do, that is a long history, just don't take the anger and frustration out on your family.

    I learnt the hard way, it got to the point where I took all the stress of school exams and work on my parents, I got close to punchin mum for the third time, mum had to call the police. They talked to me in my room and I they said that I did well not to punch mum but I shouldn't scare her.

    After that things got worse with my temper, fuse got shorter, reactions more violent.

    I punched her again, the police came round again and asked what happened, this was over one small comment.

    Don't make the mistakes I have, get help if you start to feel like this, or you'll get like me

    Good luck

  • So sorry to hear of all the violence you've suffered and it isn't surprising you're suffering from depression. Aside from the physical/mental trauma I'm wondering why anyone would suffer so much violence & whether you're a tall male. It's often the case that boys or men who're taller than average are targeted as a challenge ; always by

    gangs of cowards but rarely by individuals. Yes, I could be way, way off the mark so I apologise in advance if that's the case.

    Not that this helps you in any way but I'm curious as I have a friend who is 6'3" and has a quiet disposition but has been picked on and challenged all his life by thugs.

    I wonder whether you're ever had counselling, particularly for PTSD, as if not, maybe you could arrange a referral from your GP. (Forgive me if you've already been down this route).

    And there's obviously the question of antidepressants ; what's your stance on them ? I know there's divided opinion on them but I, personally, would have a big struggle without them.

    Cat x

  • You ever thought of moving?;-)

  • Thank you for all the messages back, I used this site over 18 month ago saying that I had shrapnel in my brain, or so an MRI scan showed, but after further X-ray it never showed nothing. I am 5ft 9" and have just

    been medically discharged from the army after 23 years with mental health problems. Anger and alchihol were my biggest demons, my congestive function is slow and depression has been apart of my makeup for over 10 years. I sometimes feel suicidal and attempted suicide about 18 months ago, I was critical but made it. In the past when my kids were baby's I thought about drowning them and kept getting the urge to crash the car when kids were with me or on my own. The story goes on and on. I have spoken with CPN, saw neuro surgeon who initially believed there was shrapnel in the brain but other scans did not colabarat that information, the bottom line is depression, I don't agree with it but I have to live with it, I am on anti depressants and they help me sleep and help get me through tough days, but when my days are black and I know how tough it is for my wife and kids, suicide is never far from my mind.

  • Is your GP aware of these very serious issues ? And if so why are you not being offered more substantial treatment ?

    If head injury has not been the cause of your problems, as originally believed, this level of depression needs to be properly assessed by a senior mental health professional without further delay. You need to arrange a referral through your doctor a.s.a.p.

  • I have spoken to the doctors and everyone else you could think off, sometimes it feels as though they just don't believe me. The only reason I actually got this far with seeing anyone about anything was because I told the doctor I thought I was suffering from dimentia as my memory is terrible, not because of any head trauma that happened, I also have hearing loss of 35 percent in my left ear and 25 in my right. Most of this ties in with brain injury.

  • I still think that if the depression can be worked on, and minimised to a manageable degree, you would be suffering so much less in the meantime.

    What medication are you taking at present to help with this ?

  • Have you had any whiplash injury or been caught up in a bomb blast or stopped breathing for a short while? Just wondered if your difficulties were due to the old brain taking one shaking too many. The damage often doesn't show up on scans. Repeated concussion has a cumulative effect.

    You say your memory is impaired, what about balance, taste, sense of smell? Do you know what caused your deafness?Do you have problems learning new things?

    Just because a scan shows nothing doesn't mean that there isn't widespread microscopic damage.

  • The subsequent injuries, stabbings, beatings, the metal bars, and glass bottle, sound partially to be caused from errors in judgement. They can happen to all people, but many beatings usually do not. Perhaps the initial bang to your head at age 7, caused you to put yourself in harms way more often. Question if lost your eyesight at such a young age, how did you ever play rugby at age 15?

  • I was took to hospitol and after a couple of hours and a needle through my finger, bought my eyesight back. Don't ask me how because I don't have the answer

  • Thank You for being brave enough for sharing your experiences with us

    I too was bullied for being different luckily I struggled to have some sort of normality

    I found however that after one accidents whilst working, I managed to bang my head I suffered with more than my usual problems in particular I had a period of sleepwalking, lack of concentration, luckily I had a menial job.

    As previous writers have suggested i agree that it might be beneficial to seek medical advice

    I am only now getting treatment 50 years after my initial accident

  • Hi Dilm, I was never bullied just very daft when I was younger, although I don't suppose that gives anyone an excuse to use bayonets, bottles or bars to beat someone unconcious. But it is the last 10 years I have struggled and made some unwise desicions and found normal desicion making an issue as well as normal day to day living can be difficult. I have seen many specialists, every one says it is depression, guess wether I agree with it or not, only I will know how it affects me until I go to my grave.

  • Hi

    Sorry if i caused offence

    I have difficulty sometimes matching the words to what I want to say

  • My friend, you haven't offended me at all, so you have no need to apologise.

  • And whose fault was this? I was run down from behind by a bloke in a brand spanking new motor .... it happened once. I didn't get back on a motorbike again ----- but what was it that caused this more than once? I don't walk down the road and expect any of what you describe to happen to me ........ so what were you doing to provoke what happened to you? Pray tell ...........

  • Wow, well when I got stabbed I was protecting a girl, when I got beat with bars I was in a phone box but I like how u come to conclusions. Concusion from rugby and lost my eye sight from a severe bang to the back of the head as a kid, yes the odd altercation. But it shows how ignorant people can be jumping to there own conclusion with no evidence or even knowing the person. Gives me a clear perception of sort of person u are and I have never met u.

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