firstly thanks for all your kind words after my recent blog and i'm happy to say i made it to her second day at school and it was wonderful the tears were of happiness then. been quite bad since think i might of overdone it by walking instead of taking my chair but was it worth it, YES! but today feel awful as the pressure of this illness is starting to take its toll on my marriage. my husband screamed that i was lazy and selfish and blame everything on the fibro this has left me questioning our relationship but also myself ,he has tryed so hard to be understanding and supportive but the caring he does for me seems to be brewing resentment . i know that it must be hard for him as he suffers with sciatica(ouch) and is also type 1 diabetic ,the fibro is so unpredictable that it must seem confusing that one day i can help him a little around the house but am then bedridden for days ,but i didnt ask for this neither did he but its something i am trying to come to terms with i'm grieving for the life i had and all the things we had planned when we got married but i dont know how to help him come to terms with it.,maybe i should let him go so he can be free from the strain this illness has caused and have a life, as i feel thats what he wants although he says its not. i have tryed to talk to him about it but cant seem to find the right words i have tryed to talk about it ands and just leads to more arguing and really don't have the energy for this anymore sorry to be whinging again but don't have any other outlet as my family and friends have dropped off 1 by 1 and dont see anyone anymore thank for being there so i can vent even if its not read by anyone at least once i written it it does feel less frustrating
xxx
sleepy