Fibromyalgia Action UK
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If this illness robs me of a life thats hard enough but when i cant give my 4yr old daughter a cuddle cause the pain is unbearable it tears me apart. really am at the end of my tether now just wish mr fibro & mrs m.e would give me a break I dont usually post on here but am so frustrated that i didnt know where else to turn sorry to moan just had to get it out to people who know what its like to live with fibro/M.E

8 Replies

Hello Sleepy, So sorry to hear of your frustrations and yes, I think a lot of folks on here including myself, know exactly how you feel. I only found this forum a short time ago but it is wonderful to know that we are not alone and that there are other people who can identify with our problems especially if support is a bit thin on the ground elsewhere.

My own children have flown the nest now but even hugging my husband is often out of the question :-( I don't know how you would explain to a young child why you can't do some of the things that other mums can. I find it hard enough explaining to my OH!

I really hope that tomorrow is a better day for you.

Sending you a virtual hug - at least they don't hurt!

Jane x


thank you for your kind words sometimes all we need is to know that there are people that understand ii havent been on here for long either but find the comments really helpful .virtual hugs to you too


Hello and bless you Sleepy! I feel your pain through your message. I can't imagine how difficult it must be not to be able to hug your small child without pain. Fibro can be incredibly unfair can't it.

I think we're all inclined before Fibro to take things for granted, like cuddling our children, hugging our partners etc., the normal things in life. I wish I could have those times again. I am sure many of us feel like this. My children are older now, but they've always been huggy and tactile, they still are. Whilst I never refuse a hug, sometimes I say to be a bit careful or ouch. They're used to it now. Hubby too.

Young children tend to be like sponges, they soak up information. Explain right from the start that Mummy hurts and show them where, they will soon understand and as clumsy as little ones can be they will learn. I know that's not much consolation when all we want is to cuddle them all the time. It's like most things with Fibro, we have no choice but to adapt.

Feel free to moan Sleepy, we all feel like moaning very often I assure you! We all understand here, we are all in the same boat. We are all here for you, to try to help and support you as best we can. You are not alone here. Here's a hug for you from me.


Hi sleepy

You definetly came to the right place to let off steam. Dont apologise!! Everyone on here can empathise with your frustrations and Im sure we would all agree with your sentiment that this condition is cruel. Not content with robbing us of our health and vitality it also strives to rob us of lifes simplist pleasures, and giving and receiving hugs from our loved ones has to rank highly on the pleasureometre. Plz dont get discouraged tomorrow as scarlett ohara says - is an other day and il say a prayer that your pains are minimal and your time spent with loved ones is happy and full of hugs and laughter - keep ur chin up x Dixie x

1 like

Hi sleepy, I too have a four tr old and it's not easy, most part when pain bearable I put up with pain, but I sound like a broken record " mummy hurts " it'll be nice not to have too say it but I think she understands, I took her swimming the other day as her auntie said shed take her, I wanted too do it, god I paid the price !!!! But we want to do as much with our little ones as poss don't we? Mind you she makes me get up in the morning otherwise I wouldn't do anything!!!!! There's no clear answer for you but I do understand how you feel, truly

Take care sleepy love nicki xxxxxx


Hi sleepy I know how you feel when I was first diagnosed my children were small only 3,4and 5 years old it broke my heart that I couldn't lift them on my lap and hug them, they have all left home but I now have the most wonderful granson he's only 14 months old and doesn't understand that Nana's in pain and can't always lift him on her knee or give him cuddles or play with him, so now my heart is getting broken all over again, I also have problems hugging my husband and I'm now going to gross everyone out but I have not been able to be intermete with my husband for at least the past 5 or 6 years I think maybe more or a year less I haven't kept count because I feel so bad about it, when you marry you expect to do certain things you just take it for granted that you will be doingthings you don't expect to quite literaly have your legs cut out from under you if you know what I mean. Sorry for grossing you out take care big gentle hugs. Sithy

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Hi Sthandra. Well done for bringing up sex! I’m sure the lack of it, whether due to pain or inclination, is a major loss for all of us 😐. Luckily for me I’m single so don’t think of it AT ALL ...... weird as it used to be so important! I can only imagine what it’s like to deal with the added complications of having a loving relationship through the fibro journey so hats 🎩 off to you and your wonderful hubby for your resilience, acclimatisation and acceptance.


Hello pal

You moan away ... that's what we are here for . For people o find support and help in their darkest days and also to add humour in the other days that people feel ok .... nearly everyone in here will be as supportive as possible with you . We have all been through it .... and most still going through it .... I haven't been to bad lately that I can't cuddle my granddaughter. But it the days I can't walk her to the park or sit and play with her when she visits me that gets to me ....

I hope you feel better soon .... and I'm so so sorry you are struggling like you are ....

Big hugs xxxx


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